I originally got involved in training because of my highschool rival. It was a friendly rivalry, for the most part. We went at it in everything - from who could dress the best and get the most girls, to who could answer the most questions in japanese language class. It was downright hilarious at times, and it was frighteningly intense at others.
Well, he was devastatingly skilled in okinawan karate. I mean, he was lights out, and you would never be able to tell by his appearance or the way he carried himself. Heh, I remember when he knocked out an entire gang of dudes back in junior high without so much as breakin a sweat.
Me? I had no martial arts training whatsoever, and I could barely walk around without bumping into something.
My rival got into it with my big brother and they were seriously about to go at it. I knew that my bro was no match for this guy even though my bro could throw hands pretty well himself. So, I wondered what would happen if they actually fought, and I realized that neither one of us would win. Let me say that this is easily the most humbling experience I have had in my life so far. I had never lost a fight to anyone outside of my own family, and here was this guy who could cripple or do worse to me with relative ease. So, after highschool and a lot of self reflection, I retired from football and got into karate.
My goal was to be able to defeat this man. I know that it sounds like a corny kung fu flick, but I was seriously determined to challenge this guy and defeat him. While I was training, that little voice in my head would say things like "you are not going to beat him looking like that" or "I could hit harder than that and I am only a voice".
A funny thing happened while I was training - I began to grow, not only as a martial artist, but as a person in whole. I learned a lot of lessons about ego and humility, and well, just being able to accept myself without having to prove that I am better than someone else. I stopped trying to pursue this man, and started trying to defeat the real rival - my own ego and insecurities.
So, my martial arts training shifted from an attempt to defeat someone, to a spiritual/cultural endeavor that brings me peace and a deeper sense of self realization. It has become an inseparable part of who I am, and I couldn't stop doing it even if I wanted to. I would say that my training is the reason that I get out of bed every morning, and it is the centerpiece of my life. I thought about quitting when I first started, because like so many others, I struggled and wondered if this was really *for* me. My "quest" kept me going, and sticking with it is the best decision that I have ever made in my life. Though I have since switched styles, I continue to train hard to this day.
If I ever see the man again, I will no doubt spar him to measure my physical skills. He was so amazing, he was inspirational, and I would love to have the honor of sparring him. Then I will buy the beer, and we can laugh about the good ole days back in highschool.
I very much enjoy sparring, though. A lot.
