A revolution is already underway there ... see how successful it is against a world superpower?Hows the economy there?
I'm thinking maybe Ireland?
Well lass I'd be just returning to me roots s'all.
Besoides, ah thank ah g'ot a purty gud aksent n'all.
I posted this elsewhere, five years ago-it still applies (though I have to say that I have property and keep a boat in Mexico, so it could happen...)
Recently, I talked with a young guy who was bummed out because his girlfriend had left him. Carl and his girlfriend, Betty, lived together, but they had an open relationship (which means they could have sex with other partners). Carl requested an open relationship because Betty was not as attractive as the women he was accustomed to dating. Carl was unwilling to fully commit to Betty, and, as often happens, she found someone else-someone who was willing to fully commit. Im sure that nobody would blame Betty for leaving-except maybe for Harvey. I can imagine Carl and Betty at dinner. I can imagine Carl checking out the other women at the restaurant, looking for a more attractive partner. Carl was also bummed out because George BuSh was re-elected. Consequently, Carl is thinking of leaving the United States.
Before he goes, Id like to introduce him to his next girlfriend, Ginger. I met Ginger the day after I talked to Carl, and I think theyd be a terrific couple. Ginger is also thinking of leaving the country, but she doesnt want to move anywhere; she just wants the Blue States to divorce the Red states. Ginger cant sleep at night while her country is bombing people-though, as Ive railed about before, she had no problem when it was Clinton bombing people instead of BuSh. Like many others, Ginger thinks the united States Is so divided that we should simply become two different countries. There are problems with Gingers plan. For example, if America did get divorces, Im fairly sure the Red States would want custody of all the bombs. Maybe Ginger would sleep better if she wasnt politically connected to George BuSh, but I dont think the people getting bombed would sleep any better. Also, about 144 years ago, quite a few of the Red States tried to divorce the Blue States, and it turned out pretty badly.
I have friends whove been talking about moving to New Zealand for months, fearing BuShs re-election. Also, for several weeks, Ive been getting-mails praising the virtues of Canada, where my wife and I have a few friends and relatives, who cant understand whats happening south of their border. America must feel a lot like Betty right now, with so many citizens checking out other countries, looking for a more attractive companion. I think there arte about 50 million Republicans and 50 million Democrats in this country, The rest of us are swing voters. Swing voters, just like Betty, are looking for someone willing to commit. While Im sure that John Kerry is committed to America, Im beginning to believe that many Democrats are not. Is it possible some voters were turned off by all the Democrats whove been talking about how much they like Canada? Since the election, Ive heard Democrats complain that America has left them, but maybe its the other way around. Democrats have been looking around the restaurant for months, checking out other countries, getting ready to bail if things get rocky.
I though it was interesting that Ginger wanted to divorce the United States. Unfortunately, America has gotten very comfortable with divorce. Many Americans, when they hear the word divorce, imagine an oppressed woman from an Ibsen play, struggling to live a full life in the face of overwhelming cultural oppression. For these people, divorce represents our ability to transcend the restraints of religion and tradition. For other Americans- those who embrace tradition and religion, for example-divorce represents selfishness, and the inability to transcend personal happiness for the good of the family.
Sadly, most Republicans are thrilled to hear Democrats talk about leaving the country. Theyd love to have the place to themselves, to fix up America just the way they like it. Even those Republicans who value family and tradition would happily divorce those sniveling liberals who think that an Arab life has the same value as a good American. Maybe we could get a no-fault divorce do the whole thing without any lawyers-I know that would make the Republicans happy!
Im reminded of Zachary Taylor, who said that he would personally lead the army against any state that tried to leave the Union, and he would instantly hang any rebels he could get his hands on. That reflects my feeling on this subject: any American (Republican or Democrat) who thinks hed be better off without 50 million of his fellow Americans is a damned scoundrel, and he should get a whipping personally administered by Abraham Lincoln.
So, lets stop all this talk about divorce. Lets try to appreciate our boyfriends, girlfriends, and our husbands and wives, and our country.
and stop looking at Canada that way. It isnt polite and, besides, she doesnt look that good when you get up close.
