Need Advice?

[KungLE]

Hi,

I've recently been placed in a difficult situation. I've found a martial art that I think I like, but the teacher is making it difficult for me to really get into what I'm learning. They definitely have skill, but certain personal traits tend to make me leave a training session with a lot of disdain and anger. Not from being unable to do a technique but from a certain degree of hazing. I understand that when beginning at some new schools there may be a certain assessment period in which a student is tested to see if they can handle the training. However in each of my experiences I've come out with a higher degree of respect for my teachers and a love of the art. In this situation I feel completely antagonized.

The instructor seems very pretentious, and keeps stating that he's never been defeated and basically saying other martial practices can't match up to his. Doesn't seem to be able to remember my name, ridiculules some of the martial arts I've practiced, and keeps assuming that I've taken martial arts that I've already stated that I've never taken.

I do like the art and see a lot of promise in it, however I'm wondering if this negative environment offsets all of its positive aspects.

What would you do in this situation?

Thanks

 

[wade]

Leave.

 

[Cirdan]

Yes, leave now.

 

[Jade Tigress]

My first thought has already been posted, twice. LEAVE. This is not the kind of school you want to train at no matter what. Remember Poltergeist? "GET OUT".

 

[kaizasosei]

and keeps assuming that I've taken martial arts that I've already stated that I've never taken.

like he's saying ' you're not a part of this...'

hmmmn, sounds sortof familiar.

j

 

[KempoGuy06]

Leave.

Yes, leave now.

ditto

B

 

[morph4me]

At the risk of sounding redundant, find somewhere else to train. This guy's ego, has more than likely, far outsripped any level of skill he possesses. When you do leave, however, don't be suprised when he tells people it's becuase you couldn't take the hard training

 

[Jade Tigress]

When you do leave, however, don't be suprised when he itells people it's becuase you couldn't take the hard training

Yep. Ya know what I say? **** 'em.

 

[kidswarrior]

I've been there--twice. And so join the chorus advising you to leave--the sooner the better, since it'll only get harder as you become more vested.

 

[IcemanSK]

A guy named Gavin deBecker wrote a book called, The Gift of Fear in which he talks about that uncomfortable feeling that we sometimes get about people, situations or events that we tend to ignore because we want to "be nice" or think "we're being sily" or some such thing. deBecker encourages us to not ignore that because it's our gut telling us that it's a bad situation for us. I think this is a good example of that.

You're in a new school setting. It's different than others you've been in before. They haze the noobie, here. Hopefully....it will get better. But when you think about it outside of the realm of MA, is that what you want from someone you're paying to teach you something? If you were taking bowling lessons & your teacher said, "gee, nice shirt" (sarcastically) or "do you always stand like that?" would you stick around? I wouldn't think the teacher wanted to teach ME.

Listen to your gut....Is it saying GET OUT!:supcool:

 

[jks9199]

Hi,

I've recently been placed in a difficult situation. I've found a martial art that I think I like, but the teacher is making it difficult for me to really get into what I'm learning. They definitely have skill, but certain personal traits tend to make me leave a training session with a lot of disdain and anger. Not from being unable to do a technique but from a certain degree of hazing. I understand that when beginning at some new schools there may be a certain assessment period in which a student is tested to see if they can handle the training. However in each of my experiences I've come out with a higher degree of respect for my teachers and a love of the art. In this situation I feel completely antagonized.

The instructor seems very pretentious, and keeps stating that he's never been defeated and basically saying other martial practices can't match up to his. Doesn't seem to be able to remember my name, ridiculules some of the martial arts I've practiced, and keeps assuming that I've taken martial arts that I've already stated that I've never taken.

I do like the art and see a lot of promise in it, however I'm wondering if this negative environment offsets all of its positive aspects.

What would you do in this situation?

Thanks

Doesn't sound like a place I'd like to spend my time or money...

If you like the style, but not the instructor -- look for another school.

Otherwise, find another style.

 

[searcher]

So I don't have to say leave, run as fast as you can away from there.

 

[HelloKitty]

You can find another school to learn the art you like. But you can't concentrate in an environment like that. Just leave.

 

[KungLE]

Thanks for the advice guys, I really appreciate it. I've already sent a notice to the instructor in question.

 

[Kacey]

As has been said - it's hard listen to that little voice in a new situation, but I'm glad to hear that you did.

 

[hongkongfooey]

Hi,


The instructor seems very pretentious, and keeps stating that he's never been defeated and basically saying other martial practices can't match up to his. Doesn't seem to be able to remember my name, ridicules some of the martial arts I've practiced, and keeps assuming that I've taken martial arts that I've already stated that I've never taken.

He's never been defeated because he's probably never been in a fight.

What system of MA is this?

 

[Sanchin-J]

Wow, just by reading about your instructor I got a very vivid image in my head of the Cobra Kai Karate instructor from that movie 'Karate Kid' and it sincerely ticked me off. This instructor sounds more like a man with little self esteem and a very very large ego which don't go well together in regards to the quality of training the instructor could provide.

His boasting about his "undefeated" standing and how no other martial art can match his is absolutely ludicrous and I almost don't believe he said it. If this guy was in any way, shape or form a seasoned instructor in his art, he would know better. Boasting that your undefeated and somehow "superior" to everyone else is ridiculous, no matter how good someone thinks they are, there is always the possibility of someone being out there who is better. As for the style being "unmatched" that's really a matter of his own personal opinion as there is no feasible way to truly prove it. I'd discard his boasts on the grounds that he's full of hot air and is NOT suited to teach others with the obvious brain damage he must have.

I'm gonna go with the others on this particular subject and say..

Leave. Find a new instructor or dojo to train at, don't get sucked into some egotists skewed fantasies.

Edit: Or if you really want to see something interesting, post the instructor's name, the address and class schedule of his dojo and we can all send out this guy's challenge to the world of Martial Arts. Garauntee he won't remain undefeated for long.

 

[Guardian]

Alot of experience here is telling you to leave. I'm adding my "Get the heck out of their" their to full of themselves to be of any benefit to you in the long run.

 

[Xue Sheng]

Thanks for the advice guys, I really appreciate it. I've already sent a notice to the instructor in question.

Sent notice means what?

If it means you are leaving good, you should leave this instructor, he apparently feels the need to assert his superiority by means of boasting which tells me he is lacking somewhere... bigtime.

Leave, leave now and don't look back. Find another school and continue your training with someone that is more likely to teach you what you need.

 

[Rich Parsons]

Hi,

I've recently been placed in a difficult situation. I've found a martial art that I think I like, but the teacher is making it difficult for me to really get into what I'm learning. They definitely have skill, but certain personal traits tend to make me leave a training session with a lot of disdain and anger. Not from being unable to do a technique but from a certain degree of hazing. I understand that when beginning at some new schools there may be a certain assessment period in which a student is tested to see if they can handle the training. However in each of my experiences I've come out with a higher degree of respect for my teachers and a love of the art. In this situation I feel completely antagonized.

The instructor seems very pretentious, and keeps stating that he's never been defeated and basically saying other martial practices can't match up to his. Doesn't seem to be able to remember my name, ridiculules some of the martial arts I've practiced, and keeps assuming that I've taken martial arts that I've already stated that I've never taken.

I do like the art and see a lot of promise in it, however I'm wondering if this negative environment offsets all of its positive aspects.

What would you do in this situation?

Thanks

The best system in the world means nothing in the end if the student and the instructor cannot have a relationship. And All I am talking about is the student instructor relationship. If you cannot learn there then move on. You may choose the same art but a different instructor. That instructor might be an hour away versus the 5 minutes the current might be.

If you do not like it you will not stay.