I've always thought it made more sense to call in well. "I'm sorry, but the day is too beautiful and I'm too happy to spoil it by coming to work."
It's a condition I refer to as "rectal glaucoma", because sometimes you just can't see your *** going to work.
I so laughed when I read that. I'll tell you a funny story...
I used to work for a very powerful corporate entity. Once in a while they would hire people as political favors and place them in powerful positions for a year, so they could have it on their resume and move upward, laterally, somewhere else. So they appoint this nitwit who decides he's going to to clean up the attendance problem. Except we didn't have an attendance problem. Not even a little one. He put in a rule that when we called in sick, we had to give the medical reason why,
in detail. (a direct violation of the HIPPA laws)
We (federal cops) laughed our collective butts off. I said I'd fire the first salvo the next morning. A female cop, Betty, asked me what time I'd call in - as she would call in five minutes later and put an end to it with a flourish and a serious f'n bang. I called in sick, with anal glaucoma, and stated exactly what you said when dispatch asked what the medical reason was.
She calls in sick five minutes later. When asked why by dispatch, what the medical condition is, she starts to sob. Explains (between gasps and sobs, all RECORDED) that she has a vaginal discharge that's just wrong, and starts crying loudly, then hangs up. She immediately calls Human Resources, which just happens to be ninety percent female. Their office was directly above our floor. From what I was told, you could hear a dozen chairs behind shoved back from their desks, as a crazed and irate dozen human resource folks charged down to our floor, yelling, "are you people out of your God damn minds?"
The nitwit appointee was immediately canned. Betty got a month off with pay and man, they treaded carefully around her from there on out. And we just started to bang in sick every other day just for sheets and giggles.
I admire the heck out of Betty. She was a good cop, and she absolutely rocked.
Score one for the workers!
