I'd like to get some advice

[Themsah]

Hey guys first thread on this forum. may get a bit lengthy sorry in advance. So basically I am fairly new to TKD and it all started with my son (7yo).He was having some discipline issues in school, and the counselor suggested martial arts. We first put him in a Moo duk Kwan TKD class at the local community college and we were not very pleased (although it was very inexpensive). We then found an ATA school close to our home and were very impressed with the school, instructor, and all around atmosphere. My son has been at this school for 8 months has made a complete change. The instructor and owner of the school has basically taken a very special interest in my son. He has even visited my sons class to talk to my sons teacher (really above and beyond). We have been so happy in fact that my youngest son (4yo) my daughter (15 yo) and myself (35yo) are all now students at the school. Here are the issues. I think most of my concerns are with the ATA.

Firstly all of us are now coming to a point in our training where we are beginning to spar and need sparring gear. Looking around online I can get a decent set of Macho gear for around $100 each set, but I was told that we must use ONLY ATA sparring gear which costs $300 each set. Secondly I was interested in weapons training and self defense. After asking, I was told that these were a separate curriculum with the ATA and costs $50 extra monthly and also has a $150 registration fee. Not to mention the weapons must be purchased through the ATA. Finally my last concern comes down to sparring itself. We have always had "light contact" sparring sessions in class. Mainly I thought this was to demonstrate "self control" and to not injure some of the other adults in the class. I mean we all have to wake up and go to work the next day right. I just assumed that competition sparring would be full contact. Well there is a tournament coming up in my area and I was interested in trying it out. So I did some research and found that the ATA sparring rules are "non-contact". I'm sure everyone can image the problems with this so I wont take up the time to express them.

So in closing I am very unsure, and have the following questions:
1) Is the ATA an association I should stay away from? and should I let that dictate what Dojahng I train at?
2) The whole point of starting TKD was for my son to learn things like Discipline, Respect, Self control. All of which are preached heavily at our school. Am I not accomplishing my goal, even tho the material maybe not as "hardcore" as other schools?
3) Would it make sense for myself to train at a different school than my kids, seeing as I am not looking for such a family friendly atmosphere in my own training?

as a side note, I would like to say that I have looked into a few schools in my area. Trying to find either a WTF or ITF school. I have found non. I have found a million schools that all have their own association and all claim to be the best (within their own organization of course) So finding a new school isn't easy.

thanks for taking the time to read and reply

 

[Instructor]

Firstly welcome to MT. Thankfully you will find scores of TKD schools out there, you should shop around to see if anybody is more reasonably priced.

 

[Steve]

Okay. I'm not a TKD guy, but like you, I got into martial arts for many of the same reasons. So, take this in context.

1: First, I won't/can't comment on the ATA. I have no experience here.
2: What do you want from the training? Are you looking to create a fighter out of your child? If so, maybe you're in the wrong spot. But if your son enjoys the training, is having fun AND is developing life skills, I would say that everything else is secondary. There are other GREAT activities that will teach your son discipline, respect and self control, but if your son likes THIS, then I wouldn't worry about it. Just make sure that he understands what he IS learning and what he ISN'T learning.

Regarding 3, again, it depends on your priorities and WHY you're training. If you're training to spend quality time with your kids, to bond, to develop something in common, then that trumps the quality of your training, in my opinion. I trained at a mcdojo for 3 years while my kids trained there. When they decided that they were bored with martial arts, I was free to find a style more suitable for myself.

Now, that said, if you want to train in a different atmosphere, are craving a tougher workout, more competition or whatever else, there's no reason you can't fully support your kids and also do what works for you. Be receptive to the idea, though, that what you might be looking for is something other than TKD (for yourself).

Good luck!

 

[dancingalone]

First, within the TKD world, the association/certification is not necessarily an indicator of training rigor or intensity. You can find within them all schools that veer more to the fun side and cater to children and have lots of fees for everything. The individual teacher is more important in terms of what he chooses to teach along with the direction he chooses for his school and business.

So, your decision point is whether you want to change things up for yourself and possibly your children as well. My gut reaction is that you should leave the kiddos where they are so long as you can afford (and stomach) the fees financially, since you say the environment and teacher has been good for your son. Why fix what is not broken? For yourself, look around at the local martial arts schools both inside and outside of taekwondo in both commercial and noncommercial settings (like the YMCA or boxing gym or even a free class in the park). The chances are quite high IMO you can find a better fit for yourself personally in intensity and cost if you're willing to look around and you don't need the nicely equipped commercial studio experience.

One more thing... If you don't like the ATA contact rules for their tournaments, nothing says you must compete in them, even if you remain an ATA member. If you live in a large enough locale, there should be ample tournament opportunities run by other groups and even the occasional bash thrown independently by a host school. There is a point-sparring circuit in my area that has TKD/karate/kung fu people all thrown in together. The contact level is supposed to be 'light', but in practice it's really up to what the judges will permit, and that will vary ring by ring.

 

[rickster]

So in closing I am very unsure, and have the following questions:
1) Is the ATA an association I should stay away from? and should I let that dictate what Dojahng I train at?
2) The whole point of starting TKD was for my son to learn things like Discipline, Respect, Self control. All of which are preached heavily at our school. Am I not accomplishing my goal, even tho the material maybe not as "hardcore" as other schools?
3) Would it make sense for myself to train at a different school than my kids, seeing as I am not looking for such a family friendly atmosphere in my own training?

as a side note, I would like to say that I have looked into a few schools in my area. Trying to find either a WTF or ITF school. I have found non. I have found a million schools that all have their own association and all claim to be the best (within their own organization of course) So finding a new school isn't easy.

thanks for taking the time to read and reply

1.) I had once trained at a ATA affilated school. The ATA is close to any other association, as they are a marketing/commercialized school

2.) If there is the positive result you are getting for him, then stay there as a family until he advances and then, perhaps, through advancement and age, you can try another school. To change now will "alienate and make your son uncomfortable"

3.) If you go somewhere else/different than where he is, he will be confused as to why. Per, maybe his school is lacking because his parent his going somewhere else. I would stick it out with him, leading by example and as per #2.)

Findng a good school isn't easy. Unless you are near a large metro area. Many of my students whom have grown/matured, and became independent, either going to or out of college, those who have moved away, are constantly contacting me with links or information about a school in the area of their new residency.

I usually pull no punches when I examine these they present to me.

They are mindful of my recommedation/suggestion

 

[Dirty Dog]

Hey guys first thread on this forum. may get a bit lengthy sorry in advance.

Welcome to MT. You'll find more than a few taekwondoin here. Hope you enjoy it.

So basically I am fairly new to TKD and it all started with my son (7yo).He was having some discipline issues in school, and the counselor suggested martial arts. We first put him in a Moo duk Kwan TKD class at the local community college and we were not very pleased (although it was very inexpensive). We then found an ATA school close to our home and were very impressed with the school, instructor, and all around atmosphere. My son has been at this school for 8 months has made a complete change. The instructor and owner of the school has basically taken a very special interest in my son. He has even visited my sons class to talk to my sons teacher (really above and beyond). We have been so happy in fact that my youngest son (4yo) my daughter (15 yo) and myself (35yo) are all now students at the school. Here are the issues. I think most of my concerns are with the ATA.

Sounds like you've found an instructor that really clicks with you. That's good. That may well be THE single most important (and difficult) part of martial arts training.

Firstly all of us are now coming to a point in our training where we are beginning to spar and need sparring gear. Looking around online I can get a decent set of Macho gear for around $100 each set, but I was told that we must use ONLY ATA sparring gear which costs $300 each set. Secondly I was interested in weapons training and self defense. After asking, I was told that these were a separate curriculum with the ATA and costs $50 extra monthly and also has a $150 registration fee. Not to mention the weapons must be purchased through the ATA.

Welcome to the Wild World of Commercial Martial Arts Schools, where Making a Profit matters. Will the added expense affect your ability to train? Can you pony up the cash for sparring gear for your entire family at once, or will you need to spread out the cost? Talk to your instructor honestly about your issues.
Commercial schools are, as a rule, going to push (or require) you to purchase gear from them. And they're often going to have lots of seperate fees (like the "registration fee" people pay for handing over a piece of paper). Why? Because they have bills to pay too, and if they don't keep the cash flow up, the doors don't stay open.

Finally my last concern comes down to sparring itself. We have always had "light contact" sparring sessions in class. Mainly I thought this was to demonstrate "self control" and to not injure some of the other adults in the class. I mean we all have to wake up and go to work the next day right. I just assumed that competition sparring would be full contact. Well there is a tournament coming up in my area and I was interested in trying it out. So I did some research and found that the ATA sparring rules are "non-contact". I'm sure everyone can image the problems with this so I wont take up the time to express them.

This is actually a non-issue. Go find non-ATA touraments, with a ruleset you like, and spar all you like.

So in closing I am very unsure, and have the following questions:
1) Is the ATA an association I should stay away from? and should I let that dictate what Dojahng I train at?

Generally speaking, the org a school is affiliated with should have little or nothing to do with your decision on whether or not to train there. If the school and training fits your needs, that is what really matters. It sounds like your current school is a so-so match for you. If you can find a better match, then change.

2) The whole point of starting TKD was for my son to learn things like Discipline, Respect, Self control. All of which are preached heavily at our school. Am I not accomplishing my goal, even tho the material maybe not as "hardcore" as other schools?

Doesn't really matter what is "preached".. is your son learning these things? Preaching and teaching are not at all the same. If what you're getting out of the school matches (reasonably closely) what you want from MA training, then you're in a good place.

3) Would it make sense for myself to train at a different school than my kids, seeing as I am not looking for such a family friendly atmosphere in my own training?

You're really the only one who can decide that.

 

[chrispillertkd]

Hello, and welcome to MT.

We then found an ATA school close to our home and were very impressed with the school, instructor, and all around atmosphere. My son has been at this school for 8 months has made a complete change. The instructor and owner of the school has basically taken a very special interest in my son. He has even visited my sons class to talk to my sons teacher (really above and beyond). We have been so happy in fact that my youngest son (4yo) my daughter (15 yo) and myself (35yo) are all now students at the school.

First of all, I'm glad your son has made a lot of progress. That does, in fact, speak well of your instructor and your school.

Here are the issues. I think most of my concerns are with the ATA.

Firstly all of us are now coming to a point in our training where we are beginning to spar and need sparring gear. Looking around online I can get a decent set of Macho gear for around $100 each set, but I was told that we must use ONLY ATA sparring gear which costs $300 each set. Secondly I was interested in weapons training and self defense. After asking, I was told that these were a separate curriculum with the ATA and costs $50 extra monthly and also has a $150 registration fee. Not to mention the weapons must be purchased through the ATA.

Someone already mentioned that commercial DoJang have to make ends meet. IMNSHO, "the laborer deserves his wages." An instructor, in other words, is entitled to make a decent living. This, of course, must be measured against your ability (and willingness) to pay the prices he asks for. IMNSHO, the prices seem on the high side. But I don't know anything about where you're located, what kind of finances you have, etc. The bottom line is, do you value the things you have learned so far, and what is on the horizen, as much, or more than, the money you'll have to spend?

Finally my last concern comes down to sparring itself. We have always had "light contact" sparring sessions in class. Mainly I thought this was to demonstrate "self control" and to not injure some of the other adults in the class. I mean we all have to wake up and go to work the next day right. I just assumed that competition sparring would be full contact. Well there is a tournament coming up in my area and I was interested in trying it out. So I did some research and found that the ATA sparring rules are "non-contact". I'm sure everyone can image the problems with this so I wont take up the time to express them.

People already mentioned you can attend non-ATA tournaments. I do know, however, some schools that are pretty insular when it comes to tournaments they "let" their students attend. Yes, "let" is in quotes because you're an adult but I know instructors who tell their students to keep away from non-organizational tournaments or they won't be able to keep training their. I have no idea if your teacher, or the ATA for that matter, has a similar policy. One important thing to keep in mind, regardless of the situation, is the importance of keeping harmony within the school and between yourself and your instructor.

So in closing I am very unsure, and have the following questions:
1) Is the ATA an association I should stay away from? and should I let that dictate what Dojahng I train at?

This is, ultimately, a question only you can answer. Despite what people say about organizations not being important they are to an extent. Most people like to talk about themselves, their accomplishments, their abilities, etc. when it comes to martial arts. Sometimes they'll mention their immediate instructor. But the fact of the matter is, lineage - and that is something that gets bound up in organziations, for good or ill - counts, too. You don't spring fully formed from some martial arts deity's forehead. You come from somewhere and trained with someone and those people joined some organization that sets some sort of technical standard. It's like the old saying, "Show me your friends and I'll show you yourself." This is applicable for individual instructors, as well as organizations. There are a couple of organizations I will have nothing to do with because I know people who hold pretty high office and I want nothing to do with them and wouldn't want to be seen as associating with them. But that's just me.

Organizations are, to greater or lesser degrees, about quality control. Some do a better job at this than others. Some are designed to set a higher standard than others. But the fact is, amongst many the ATA doesn't have what I'd call a sterling reputation.

That being said, I have friends who send their children to ATA school. They are happy with the experience their children receive.

2) The whole point of starting TKD was for my son to learn things like Discipline, Respect, Self control. All of which are preached heavily at our school. Am I not accomplishing my goal, even tho the material maybe not as "hardcore" as other schools?

That's an answer only you can answer. From your posting it seems you're happy with the strides your son has made. I also assume that both you and your daughter enjoy the training you receive and see some worth in it.

3) Would it make sense for myself to train at a different school than my kids, seeing as I am not looking for such a family friendly atmosphere in my own training?

If you can afford the extra time, travel, etc. that would be involved in such an endeavor. Of course, you might want to weigh that against the esprit de corps you experience with your children when you train together. You would also have to explain to your kids why you've chosen to train elsewhere while your old school is "good enough" for them.

as a side note, I would like to say that I have looked into a few schools in my area. Trying to find either a WTF or ITF school. I have found non. I have found a million schools that all have their own association and all claim to be the best (within their own organization of course) So finding a new school isn't easy.

You might want to check out the web sites of various national organizations. They generally have lists of schools affiliated with them and links to their web sites. If you're interested in ITF schools PM me. I might be able to help link yo uup with someone depending on where you live.

Pax,

Chris

 

[Gorilla]

That is allot of $!

 

[Dirty Dog]

That is allot of $!

Not necessarily. If you're talking $300 for hands/feet like http://www.centurymartialarts.com/Sparring_Gear/Gloves/Cloth_Forearm_and_Hand_Pad.aspx then yes, it's insane.

If, on the other hand, you're talking about high quality gear that includes gloves, feet/shin guards, headgear and a hogu, then it's probably not unreasonable. The OP doesn't say exactly what's included, but the Macho brand that he mentions is, in my opinion, fairly good stuff, but not top notch, and not my choice for my own gear.

And let's face it. When you buy through your local school, it's likely you're going to pay slightly more than you would for the same (or comparable) gear bought from an online vendor like Century. Online vendors don't have nearly as much overhead as brick and mortar shops.

 

[dancingalone]

That is allot of $!

Generally, ATA schools, at least the ones I am familiar with, are located in facilities that are nicely furnished and have heating/AC, bright lights, good parking, and close access to other businesses like restaurants. All those amenities come at a cost and should be factored in when one considers the tuition and other assorted expenses that comes with being a member. Also consider that a commercial school owner will likely understand he runs a business ultimately and will react accordingly to reasonable student requests.

In contrast there is the local kenpo curmudgeon in his garage dojo for example. It's his way or the highway. He only has like 3 students but the instruction is pretty good and the price is right too. But, summer classes are brutal in the heat and because he has only 3 students, sparring can become stale after a while because of the limited number of partners. For that reason, he sometimes asks if he can take his guys to one of my sparring sessions.

Anyway, there are pros and cons to every situation and savvy students need to be aware of what they are looking for first so they can look for a match with the options out there.

 

[Themsah]

WOW guys let me begin by thanking all of you for reading (i know it was long) my post and giving me your advice. You guy have made some awesome points and here is what I think i am going to do.
#1 The ATA doesnt seem all that bad except for the money aspect. And sadly I am sure my instructor is probably paying the ATA a TON of franchise fees and such to them as well. In other words I would feel much better if I knew that the money from my slightly more expensive gear was actually going into my instructors pocket. But in the big picture I guess this not such a big deal.
#2 As many of you said our goal as a family joining TKD was to learn respect, discipline, self control and integrity. In this aspect we are getting more than our money's worth.
#3 You guys have made it clear as day that if I decide to train at another Dojahng it will just send the entirely wrong message to my children, not to mention ruin the family time we now spend together. Also I would have to explain to the Master why I no longer train with them. As far as sparring goes, I never thought about competing in other schools competitions. I will try it and see how it goes.

Thanks so much for opening my eyes to the obvious..LOL

 

[Themsah]

Not necessarily. If you're talking $300 for hands/feet like http://www.centurymartialarts.com/Sparring_Gear/Gloves/Cloth_Forearm_and_Hand_Pad.aspx then yes, it's insane.

If, on the other hand, you're talking about high quality gear that includes gloves, feet/shin guards, headgear and a hogu, then it's probably not unreasonable. The OP doesn't say exactly what's included, but the Macho brand that he mentions is, in my opinion, fairly good stuff, but not top notch, and not my choice for my own gear.

And let's face it. When you buy through your local school, it's likely you're going to pay slightly more than you would for the same (or comparable) gear bought from an online vendor like Century. Online vendors don't have nearly as much overhead as brick and mortar shops.

I do consider this a lot of money and have a problem with it for a few reasons. Firstly what you get for the $300 is a set of hands, feet, head, and an ATA gym bag, all of which are made by Macho only with an ATA logo instead of the Macho logo. Here they are http://www.ataonline.com/ishop/main/content.asp?cat_code=736&code1=&group=030 and http://www.ataonline.com/ishop/main/content.asp?cat_code=039&code1=&group=030. I can buy a similar set here http://www.kungfu4less.com/machodynasparringgearset.html for $50 and ad a gym bag for $20 bucks and be done for less than $100. SO the price is extremely inflated. I wouldnt even mind if I knew the extra $200 were going to my school directly, but I am sure my school probably buys the gear from the ATA for $250.

Secondly like Dirty Dog says this gear is "fairly good stuff" and not top notch. Even if I wanted to buy top notch gear, I am not allowed. It has to be the gear shown above.

This is the only thing that still doesnt sit right with me. I guess in the gran scheme of things its not such a big deal. I will just have to live with it

 

[rickster]

Since I have access to printing machines and material, I'll buy the cheaper stuff and ink the ATA logo on top

That said, the ATA org I was with, did not mandate ATA Gear

Find out if the instructor mandates it or is willing to work it out with you

 

[oftheherd1]

WOW guys let me begin by thanking all of you for reading (i know it was long) my post and giving me your advice. You guy have made some awesome points and here is what I think i am going to do.
#1 The ATA doesnt seem all that bad except for the money aspect. And sadly I am sure my instructor is probably paying the ATA a TON of franchise fees and such to them as well. In other words I would feel much better if I knew that the money from my slightly more expensive gear was actually going into my instructors pocket. But in the big picture I guess this not such a big deal.
#2 As many of you said our goal as a family joining TKD was to learn respect, discipline, self control and integrity. In this aspect we are getting more than our money's worth.
#3 You guys have made it clear as day that if I decide to train at another Dojahng it will just send the entirely wrong message to my children, not to mention ruin the family time we now spend together. Also I would have to explain to the Master why I no longer train with them. As far as sparring goes, I never thought about competing in other schools competitions. I will try it and see how it goes.

Thanks so much for opening my eyes to the obvious..LOL

My father's mind tells me you have answered you own questions above. But it comes down to what is most important to you. Sounds like you are in a school that is giving you most of what you want except for the tournaments. If tournaments are more important, you should seek a way to go to them. If not, it sounds like you should be where you are.

Good luck in your decision.

 

[jks9199]

#3 You guys have made it clear as day that if I decide to train at another Dojahng it will just send the entirely wrong message to my children, not to mention ruin the family time we now spend together. Also I would have to explain to the Master why I no longer train with them. As far as sparring goes, I never thought about competing in other schools competitions. I will try it and see how it goes.

Especially the parts I bolded -- these are among the worst reasons to stay at a school. The explanation you owe the instructor is simple: Your school isn't answering my needs/is too expensive/too limited. As to the family, it's the same thing, though you may have to explain it in more detail. I really don't get how you send the wrong message to your kids by being willing to recognize an error and correct it. Quitting entirely WOULD send the wrong message.

 

[Markku P]

I have some issues with this.

First, Did they inform you when you sign a contract about extra expenses?
Second, Did they mention in the contract that you must buy all the equipments only from the school? ( In my country that's against law, every customer has a right to choose where they buy their stuff.

In my opinion is that ATA Taekwondo is kind of "local" organization. They don't have many countries as a members. As example if you are a world champion in their organization, you can't compare them to ITF- or WTF-Taekwondo world champions.

It seems the instructor is good with his job but I believe training will be more expensive in the future. You might have to upgrade higher level programs, testing fees and buying all the stuff.

But if money is not a problem for you then it's OK?

I personally don't have any problems with ATA schools. I have visited many and what I have seen level is OK. What I don't like that too many of school owners won't inform before about all the expenses. ( Really good ones does that way )

/Markku P.

 

[Earl Weiss]

Welcome to the caveat emptor world of MA schools. Find out now abut any future financial surprises; Mandatory uniform changes, Seminar costs, test fees, etc.

$300 may be a lot of $ but like many things you have to amortize it over the life of the item. Kids may outgrow stuff in a year. Perhaps another parent has gently used hand me downs. . For an adut it may last 5 years of regular use.

 

[Steve]

Especially the parts I bolded -- these are among the worst reasons to stay at a school. The explanation you owe the instructor is simple: Your school isn't answering my needs/is too expensive/too limited. As to the family, it's the same thing, though you may have to explain it in more detail. I really don't get how you send the wrong message to your kids by being willing to recognize an error and correct it. Quitting entirely WOULD send the wrong message.

Absolutely! I certainly hope you didn't get the impression from my post at all that you are somehow locked in.

First, you don't owe the instructor anything more or less than what you signed in the contract (presuming you did sign a contract). You could explain to the instructor why you're leaving, and it might be the polite thing to do in some cases, but you certainly don't owe him anything... even an explanation. You are hiring him and he is providing a service.

Second, regarding your own training, if you're having fun and bonding with your kids, great. But I don't think it sends any kind of mixed message to one's kids for you to do what works for you. There's a lot we don't know about the relationship you have with your son, but I can tell you that my kids are happy that I'm happy and have no problem supporting me in what I like to do, just as I do the same for them.

And, truthfully, it's possible that while the TKD schools might be meeting the need, there may be another school, perhaps teaching another style that meshes more philosophically, financially and athletically with what you're looking for. And it could be that it works better for both you AND your son.

So, all of that to say, shop around. Do your homework. Talk to people and research on the internet the different styles that are available. My kids ultimately lost interest in "karate" and dropped out. I then found a BJJ school after doing research and it's exactly what I was looking for. A short time later, my older kids both joined and trained until they ended up in JROTC. Point being that if you're not having fun, the kids will know. And also, if you ARE having fun, perhaps you're genuine enthusiasm will be infectious. My youngest is almost 4 and she LOVES rolling around on the mats. She swears she's going to learn Jiu Jitsu and Ballet. Now, that remains to be seen, but I'll do what I can to encourage her.

 

[Daniel Sullivan]

1) Is the ATA an association I should stay away from? and should I let that dictate what Dojahng I train at?

Depends on what you want; whether or not a school is a good fit has more to do with the needs of the student and the training atmosphere (including the instructor) of the school than it does with the specific organization. I wouldn't stay away just because it is ATA; the ATA does very well with providing a family friendly training atmosphere for kids and parents. The deciding factor should be whether or not the school is a good fit for you and your kids.

That said, there are elements of different organizations that do impact certain areas; WTF tournaments have a full contact rule set that rewards high kicking. ITF tournaments have a rule set with a more even hand/foot technique mix and is, so far as I know, full contact. The ATA has a light contact, full padded rule set that from what I understand is similar to WTF in other respects.

Also, ATA tournaments are closed to non ATA members. Benefit: everyone is on the same page. Drawback: if you have aspirations of international competition, your options are much more limited, and if you go from ATA tournaments to open tournaments, you might find yourself unprepared.

2) The whole point of starting TKD was for my son to learn things like Discipline, Respect, Self control. All of which are preached heavily at our school. Am I not accomplishing my goal, even tho the material maybe not as "hardcore" as other schools?

The ATA is well equipped to meet this need. If that really is your goal, and if you are happy with it, then what does it matter how hardcore other schools may or may not be?

Keep in mind that you left another school that probably was more hardcore but which was not a good fit. You need to look at what you want from the class, both for your kids and for yourself. It sounds like you are pleased with what your kids are getting and that you like the instructor.

3) Would it make sense for myself to train at a different school than my kids, seeing as I am not looking for such a family friendly atmosphere in my own training?

Only you can answer that. If your kids are happy and you're happy with what they're getting from the school, and if they don't have to have you right on hand in order to train well, then let them train their hearts out there while you go somewhere else that meets your needs.

Also, does your schedule permit it? I trained at the same place that my kids did for years partly because it was logistically untennable to train at a different place.

Regarding the question of contact and equipment: the contact level is what it is. Part of what makes the atmosphere desireable for families is that the program is not pretending to be some kind of boot camp or old school boxing gym. The contact level doesn't create any problems in my opinion; it is what it is, and since the primary goal was self discipline for your seven year old, this is really a superfluous issue. How does your daughter feel about the contact level? Since you aren't mentioning that she's clamoring to get into hard contact, it sounds like the only one who may not be having their personal training needs met is you. In which case, it may be worthwhile to train elsewhere. If you are having your training needs met, and if you can afford the costs, then I'd stick around.

Let me ask you: Since it sounds as though your kids needs are being met, what do you personally want for yourself from the school?

 

[Themsah]

Let me ask you: Since it sounds as though your kids needs are being met, what do you personally want for yourself from the school?

Every ones needs are being met, including my own. Personally for me, the main concern was the non contact sparring. Something about this just didnt sit well with me. I mean if you PRACTICE martial arts, at some point in your training I would figure you might actually put your skills to use, and not just pretend. I mean I wouldnt go to a restaurant, order a steak, then PRETEND to eat it, then walk away satisfied.

On the other hand I am aware of the fact that full contact might not be for me either. I know I am new, not a young man anymore, and I might participate probably get my butt handed to me and decide "You know what, I liked it better when people only pretended to kick me in the head"