There's a discussion in the Tae Kwon Do area regarding etiquette.
In that thread, I asked the question:
That thread's focused more on specific etiquette practices in Tae Kwon Do. I want to expand it here... How far do you take etiquette?
Let me start by noting that there are courtesies in the training hall that are essential to being safe, especially around weapons and dangerous people. Some examples are how you pass a blade, gun, or another weapon to another person, bows or other indications that you're ready to begin working with a partner, and so on. Others are simple courtesies, owed to teachers and seniors in the art, or to our training partners. In the training hall, like in life, etiquette and courtesy are the oil to keep interpersonal friction down, after all! But there are also things we may do in the training hall that are brought in as aspects of another culture. Bowing rather than a handshake or military salute, for example, or styles of dress, or styles of address.
Another post in that thread brought up the issue of what a student should do for an instructor. That post mentioned a student driving an hour each way to run a teacher a few minutes to the store. I've heard horrific stories of people bringing someone in for a seminar or to visit a training hall, and that person expecting things as extreme as providing "professional companionship" for the instructor, being expected to cover insane bar tabs, and generally drop one's life to be at the instructor's beck and call during the visit. (Yeah, some of that could be a topic all it's own...)
I'll admit to having gone quite out of my way to help my instructor out, altered plans at the last minute to assist in coordinating a seminar, and spending a lot of my own money along the way in training. In one case, someone bounced a check to me and never made good on it. I'm sure there was no maliciousness and no assumption that it was their due -- it just got lost in the shuffle, and because I was aware of some personal issues they were dealing with, I decided to eat it... Not bragging, just saying, y'know? A lot of that is in the range of what I'd do for a friend, anyway. There's a limit, and I've had to say on a few occasions that I just can't make that happen. Obviously, I'm not going to break the law for someone -- and, honestly, I'd question why that person is held in such esteem if they expected me to do so.
So... where do you draw the line? If your instructor is part-time, teaching at Y or simply working a full time job, would you bow if you came across them on the street? What if your teacher was also a plumber, and you called him to do a job for you? Do you bow to people rather than shake their hands? Where and what lines do you draw on moving training hall etiquette into the day-to-day world?
In that thread, I asked the question:
I'm curious...
How far out of the training hall do you carry your TKD specific etiquette? Do you bow to your seniors when you happen to encounter each other on the street or at work? Do you limit the meal etiquette to official dinners and the like, or do you practice it whenever you're eating?
This is coming out snarkier than I intended... but my school and my organization has never locked on rigid etiquette, especially off the training floor. I call my instructor by his first name, and my students address me by my first name. In some circumstances, we'll use formal titles, but it's rare. I've eaten many meals with my teacher, and with the grandmaster, in settings ranging from formal dinners down to sitting around a campfire. No special etiquette, other than trying not to put my foot in my mouth and making sure that they're taken care of. But I've seen and heard of TKD students (especially) who practice and take Korean etiquette practices well outside the training hall. When I see or hear that, I can't help but think of the guy who is so "serious" about his martial arts study that he speaks in fortune cookies and dresses like a Chinese peasant from 100 years ago. View attachment 18323
That thread's focused more on specific etiquette practices in Tae Kwon Do. I want to expand it here... How far do you take etiquette?
Let me start by noting that there are courtesies in the training hall that are essential to being safe, especially around weapons and dangerous people. Some examples are how you pass a blade, gun, or another weapon to another person, bows or other indications that you're ready to begin working with a partner, and so on. Others are simple courtesies, owed to teachers and seniors in the art, or to our training partners. In the training hall, like in life, etiquette and courtesy are the oil to keep interpersonal friction down, after all! But there are also things we may do in the training hall that are brought in as aspects of another culture. Bowing rather than a handshake or military salute, for example, or styles of dress, or styles of address.
Another post in that thread brought up the issue of what a student should do for an instructor. That post mentioned a student driving an hour each way to run a teacher a few minutes to the store. I've heard horrific stories of people bringing someone in for a seminar or to visit a training hall, and that person expecting things as extreme as providing "professional companionship" for the instructor, being expected to cover insane bar tabs, and generally drop one's life to be at the instructor's beck and call during the visit. (Yeah, some of that could be a topic all it's own...)
I'll admit to having gone quite out of my way to help my instructor out, altered plans at the last minute to assist in coordinating a seminar, and spending a lot of my own money along the way in training. In one case, someone bounced a check to me and never made good on it. I'm sure there was no maliciousness and no assumption that it was their due -- it just got lost in the shuffle, and because I was aware of some personal issues they were dealing with, I decided to eat it... Not bragging, just saying, y'know? A lot of that is in the range of what I'd do for a friend, anyway. There's a limit, and I've had to say on a few occasions that I just can't make that happen. Obviously, I'm not going to break the law for someone -- and, honestly, I'd question why that person is held in such esteem if they expected me to do so.
So... where do you draw the line? If your instructor is part-time, teaching at Y or simply working a full time job, would you bow if you came across them on the street? What if your teacher was also a plumber, and you called him to do a job for you? Do you bow to people rather than shake their hands? Where and what lines do you draw on moving training hall etiquette into the day-to-day world?