Well, what did you think?

IcemanSK

El Conquistador nim!
MT Mentor
MTS Alumni
Joined
Nov 7, 2005
Messages
6,482
Reaction score
181
Location
Los Angeles, CA
On Friday I was invited to a friend's daughter's black belt test. The girl is 8 or 10 years old. The standards of their school is quite different than mine. I focused on the possitives of how she did & was able to be encouraging. Discussing the differences between the standards of the two schools wouldn't be helpful to anyone.

Have you had similiar experiences (invited to another school to watch a test)? How did you approach it? Would you do something different next time?
 

searcher

Senior Master
Joined
Mar 15, 2005
Messages
3,317
Reaction score
59
Location
Kansas
Have you had similiar experiences (invited to another school to watch a test)? How did you approach it? Would you do something different next time?


Yes on watching and I have also set on testing boards by request.


I approached in a manor similar to yours. When watching, focus on the positive aspects. When on the testing board, look at it as if they were my own students.

Different next time? Yes, have plans and not be able to make it.
 

terryl965

<center><font size="2"><B>Martial Talk Ultimate<BR
MTS Alumni
Joined
Apr 9, 2004
Messages
41,259
Reaction score
340
Location
Grand Prairie Texas
Iceman I too set on many BB boards and I have to remember it is there school and look for everything positive and when I leave, I try to remember that not everyone has the same set of standard that I do.
 

Twin Fist

Grandmaster
Joined
Mar 22, 2008
Messages
7,185
Reaction score
210
Location
Nacogdoches, Tx
been there, done that.

it isnt easy. You want to be honest, BUT, you dont want to be mean.

I just try to avoid it when i can, and I am diplomatic when i cant avoid it.
 

Laurentkd

Master Black Belt
Joined
Jan 2, 2007
Messages
1,376
Reaction score
43
Location
Kansas City
I think finding the positives is especially important when you are a guest of the tester. The little girl can not be blamed for the standards of her instructor. Sounds like you responded well.
 

granfire

Sr. Grandmaster
Joined
Dec 8, 2007
Messages
15,980
Reaction score
1,594
Location
In Pain
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh

as Visitor, Guest, Onlooker....

Of a child no less....

Well, find the positive, not quiet in a Barney way, maybe give pointers where applicable (universal true aspects, like bio mechanics etc...or the origin of the Ki-Hap...) Other than that, nod a lot, and be quiet other than a hmm....

I think it is nice, and somewhat a sign of respect and trust that you were invited! Of course the parents are proud, and you gotta tread carefully around parents anyhow! ;)

For a moment I thought you had been invited to judge. I was kinda sorta guest judge...same organization, folks we used to have the grading with in the years prior, and of course I made a faux pas...telling a kid he could not touch his board after he had bowed in...but his instructor told them otherwise...(considering he is a Sr Master and I am just a freshman Black Belt...guess who had the final word! :D )
 
OP
IcemanSK

IcemanSK

El Conquistador nim!
MT Mentor
MTS Alumni
Joined
Nov 7, 2005
Messages
6,482
Reaction score
181
Location
Los Angeles, CA
I'm quite glad I wasn't on the testing board. It wasn't all bad by any means. But my students would be surprised by what passed for a belt test there.
 

granfire

Sr. Grandmaster
Joined
Dec 8, 2007
Messages
15,980
Reaction score
1,594
Location
In Pain
I'm quite glad I wasn't on the testing board. It wasn't all bad by any means. But my students would be surprised by what passed for a belt test there.


LOL, trust me, I am sometimes amazed myself...BUT, I am one of many, maybe a bit harda$$ed some time, but oh well....I'll live, I just put the thumb screws on in class... ;)
 

KGTKD

Yellow Belt
Joined
Apr 21, 2009
Messages
34
Reaction score
0
Location
Down South
Can I ask a follow up question?
My BB test was grueling, I had to break a bunch of boards, do a bunch of forms, fight a bunch of people, and defend myself, not to mention write a 10 page paper. I have seen bb tests that just have forms and a couple of boards. I have also seen 6 year old black belts.

Am I missing something?

I can't see a 6 year old being able to do a quarter of what I did, not to mention understand the meaning behind it.
 
OP
IcemanSK

IcemanSK

El Conquistador nim!
MT Mentor
MTS Alumni
Joined
Nov 7, 2005
Messages
6,482
Reaction score
181
Location
Los Angeles, CA
Can I ask a follow up question?
My BB test was grueling, I had to break a bunch of boards, do a bunch of forms, fight a bunch of people, and defend myself, not to mention write a 10 page paper. I have seen bb tests that just have forms and a couple of boards. I have also seen 6 year old black belts.

Am I missing something?

I can't see a 6 year old being able to do a quarter of what I did, not to mention understand the meaning behind it.


I appreciate the issues that you bring up, but I don't want to make this about whether or not there should be 6 year old black belts. There are more than a few threads on that topic. This thread is about seeing a difference in standards & being asked for one's thoughts by a parent.
 

jks9199

Administrator
Staff member
Lifetime Supporting Member
Joined
Jul 2, 2006
Messages
23,473
Reaction score
3,795
Location
Northern VA
I appreciate the issues that you bring up, but I don't want to make this about whether or not there should be 6 year old black belts. There are more than a few threads on that topic. This thread is about seeing a difference in standards & being asked for one's thoughts by a parent.
It's simple, to me. "It's not my style, it's not my school, but he looked pretty good. His teacher said he passed; that's great!"

It's a time for a bit of a white lie... unless it was really bad. In which case, fall back on the old standby: "You really should talk to his teacher about this, not me."
 

astrobiologist

Brown Belt
Joined
Aug 10, 2008
Messages
418
Reaction score
20
Location
York, Pennsylvania
I think you did the right thing. Maybe at a different time you could talk with the friend about their daughter's training, but even at that you should remain humble and not too forthcoming.
 

searcher

Senior Master
Joined
Mar 15, 2005
Messages
3,317
Reaction score
59
Location
Kansas
Here is a thought. Invite your friend to come over and watch a test at your school. It might help them see that they need to change where they are training.
 

miguksaram

Master of Arts
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
1,971
Reaction score
32
Location
Aurora, IL
It's simple...their house....their rules. If you don't agree with how they do things then kindly recline the offer to sit on their testing board. Else, the best you can do is focus on the consistency of what they are doing and if you have any questions about something being right or wrong, then ask one of their instructors.

Unless someone outwardly asks you how this would have been handled at your school, then there is no need to even approach that subject.
 
OP
IcemanSK

IcemanSK

El Conquistador nim!
MT Mentor
MTS Alumni
Joined
Nov 7, 2005
Messages
6,482
Reaction score
181
Location
Los Angeles, CA
Here is a thought. Invite your friend to come over and watch a test at your school. It might help them see that they need to change where they are training.


The family goes to my church (where I also teach my program) but they train elsewhere. Parents have said, "had we known you were gonna teach here, we'd have waited for your class." I have no interest in stealing another's student. (Especially after one child just tested for BB). If they decide they want to train with me it won't be because I told them the training they've received was bad or "less than" my school.

I was only a spectator at the test & not on the board. I child did have some great points that I focused on with her mom. The rest, I didn't need to mention. As others have said, "she's not my student." And frankly, I wasn't asked what I thought she could have done better.
 

miguksaram

Master of Arts
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
1,971
Reaction score
32
Location
Aurora, IL
I was only a spectator at the test & not on the board. I child did have some great points that I focused on with her mom. The rest, I didn't need to mention. As others have said, "she's not my student." And frankly, I wasn't asked what I thought she could have done better.

Then it sounds like you did the right thing.
 

Nomad

Master Black Belt
Joined
May 23, 2006
Messages
1,206
Reaction score
54
Location
San Diego, CA
Had a similar thing happen over the weekend, when an acquaintance was talking about his 9 yo just testing for black. I gave him a congratulations for her accomplishment, but he then proceeded to tell me more details, including several of her mistakes (in forms and 1-steps), and how he has it on video that one of her breaks failed because of a holder... *sigh*

The sad part is that I'm pretty confident that my daughter who is a very long way from black in our system has been training longer, has better forms and could kick her butt pretty easily...

but of course I didn't say any of this, and just kept it to myself.
 

dortiz

Black Belt
Joined
Jun 23, 2007
Messages
667
Reaction score
23
Location
Northern VA
"failed because of a holder... *sigh*"

Love that. Also I would have won the match but they fight different.


Dave O.
 

granfire

Sr. Grandmaster
Joined
Dec 8, 2007
Messages
15,980
Reaction score
1,594
Location
In Pain
"failed because of a holder... *sigh*"

Love that. Also I would have won the match but they fight different.


Dave O.


AHAHAHAHAHA, you never had a bad holder then....Bless you.

Seriously, if you got somebody flinching right as you strike you might not be able to break....that's why we got the rule that you can request different holders. But then again... is true for the match, too....would have won but they punch to the head, we don't... :D
 

Latest Discussions

Top