Signs your Ninja training might be questionable at best

Bester

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1- Your instructor is named "Master Sony" or "Master Magnavox".
2- Instead of training at a dojo, you train in your living room in front of the tv.
3- You want to be just like Sho Kashugi when you finish training.
4- You consider Michael Dudikoff an inspiration.
5- You bought your training gear at Walmart.
6- You have studied carefully the works of Ashida Kim, Count Dante or HaHa Lung.
7- You have a certificate showing a mastery of Dux-Ryu, Tew Ninjitsu or trained at the Golden Dragon Dojo in WNY.
8- You spell Ninjutsu, ninjitsu.
9- You made up your own art.
10- Terms in your made up art are in your own made up language.
11- You consider training to involve throwing yourself against trees at 2 am.
12- You're ideas are constantly ridiculed on web forums populated by serious practitioners.
13- You are a student of Ashida Kim, Rick Tew, Frank Dux, Robert Bussey or Soke Calkins.
14- The hell with that tradition stuff, pass me the nunchucks!
15- You think real ninjas walked around with ninja-tos, in black outfits and disappeared in puffs of smoke.


Add yours :lol:
 

seasoned

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#16 You yell "line up" and nobody is there.
#17 Your Ninja outfit subs for pajamas.
 

Omar B

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You bought some of your ninja arsenal off of QVC.
Your training is so secret even your instructor can't tell you about it, but it involves lots of time one on one in private with him
 
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Bob Hubbard

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This is your ninja sword.
[yt]IMuZoGVz9tc[/yt]
 
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Bob Hubbard

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Ah, but do you own such a magnificent weapon? I do....cuts snow blocks nicely...wouldn't trust it on anything harder. LOL!
 
OP
Bester

Bester

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You set off smoke bombs and yell out "Poof, I vanish" before diving behind the sofa.
 

jks9199

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#16 You yell "line up" and nobody is there.
#17 Your Ninja outfit subs for pajamas.
But wouldn't a really good ninja school also yell "line up!" and have nobody visible? ;) :D
 

Tanaka

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#18 You've been teaching a certain art(Ex. Karate), and all of a sudden you have a Ninja master teacher(that no one knew about) with ancient lineage. And you now teach Koka ryu Ninjutsu.
 

Bob Hubbard

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No, I don't buy crap.

But if I do buy a sword that would be a huge sign that I've lost my mind. Swords, who needs 'em but the insane and larpers?
Omar, I run 3 forums, admin several more......I -am- insane. :rofl:
Plus I own about 20+ blades....paid something like $5 for the one in question before I knew much about steel quality...or saw the video.

As to who needs em.....I do FMA...those are all more or less blade arts, including swords. Tell a Pekiti or Sayoc they're a larper.....but please, have a camera running....it'd make a good Youtube clip. :D
 

Omar B

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Omar, I run 3 forums, admin several more......I -am- insane. :rofl:
Plus I own about 20+ blades....paid something like $5 for the one in question before I knew much about steel quality...or saw the video.

As to who needs em.....I do FMA...those are all more or less blade arts, including swords. Tell a Pekiti or Sayoc they're a larper.....but please, have a camera running....it'd make a good Youtube clip. :D

Those guys I have no problem with, I'm talking about full on broadswords, claymores, katana and such. I don't see myself getting into many duels in the foreseeable future.

More to add to the thread:

-This is your master
5d5823eb-9bf5-49ca-919f-27044a1312e6.jpg


-This is your training partner
f0c17db5-b313-4bc8-93dc-04d3f63dd62e.jpg
 

Bob Hubbard

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Note: Omar has rendered me comment less with the 2nd pic.
 

Archangel M

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I admit I miss the days of the ninja craze. Running around in tabi and black gi. Reading Ashida Kim and S Hayes books, watching "The Master" on TV. Running around the neighborhood on ninja missions.

But I was 14-16 years old then.
 

Muawijhe

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Those guys I have no problem with, I'm talking about full on broadswords, claymores, katana and such. I don't see myself getting into many duels in the foreseeable future.

I think only the dillusional see themselves getting into sword duels in the future. Me, I just like working with swords from a historical/hobbyist standpoint. But truth be told, and in align with what you said, I think all of us who are into iaido and koryu kenjutsu are crazy... but in a good way!

Bester said:
4- You consider Michael Dudikoff an inspiration.

I do consider Michael Dudikoff an inspiration! He killed many ninja regardless of what color gi they wore!

And now that I have a black belt certificate in HakkyoKen Ninjitsu through Ashida Kim, I can be just like him!

rsz_hakkyoken_resize.jpg
 

Grenadier

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Careful, they may end up like the comic book character "Kick ***"


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OP
Bester

Bester

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If your ninja training involves Zords or Morphing

If your instructor shows up in the Horror Stories section of this site........more than once!

If your training involves such real ninja weapons as a batleth, ninjato, or blades made by Hibben.

You found your 'master' through a spam message he posted on internet forums looking for students for his 'live in training class'

Your instructor cites training under other organizations that no one can verify. Other than as names used in Japanese Anime and US Cartoons.

Your instructor has ever appeared in a National Geographic special and explained that his techniques can be overcome if you lift your toe or tuck your tongue.

Your 'kia' is "OUCH!"
 

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