A well-liked professor addressing lawyer-bashing

[RandomPhantom700]

bugs that eat waste and excrete petrol... aren't they called Lawyers??

I'd like to respond to this...viewpoint, if I can call it that..., but I believe that the soon-to-be late Professor Steve Gey from FSU put it much better then I ever could. I say soon-to-be late because he was diagnosed with ALS last year and, though he continued to teach up until the last 2 weeks of Spring 2008, he wasn't even healthy enough to attend our graduation ceremony. Anyway, here goes...

Professor Steve_Gey:_Inspiration_for_Lawyers

 

[RandomPhantom700]

MA-Caver, I don't know what run-in you had with a lawyer that causes you to hate anyone of that profession so much, but please know that many good-hearted lawyers, law students, and law professors really can't stand all the snide, off-the-cuff lawyer jokes that people throw around. Sure there are scumbag lawyers out there, but do me a favor and try to not lump every attorney that exists among them.

Sorry to have made a whole thread about this, but it's insulting to hear the constant lawyer jokes. Besides, it was a good opportunity to post the video.

/off soap box

 

[Sukerkin]

That's understandable, Phantom and it is unfair in a way for lawyers to take such a beating from all and sundry.

However, no lawyer has ever done me wrong and I still think that the 'bloodsucking' tag most often applied is by-and-large an earned one (outside of the criminal side of things). The fees charged for relatively simple duties are extortionate, especially those wherein someone else actually does the work - that's what annoys most ordinary people so much.

Mind you that does come from someone who qualified as an accountant at one point in his life (never worked as one tho' I hasten to add ).

I'll watch the video tho', out of respect for your goodself and the ailing professor :rei:.

 

[jks9199]

I've got kin that are lawyers. And there are many lawyers whom I highly respect. Most lawyers (like most folks in any profession) are people; some are exceptional, some are jerks, and most are average.

But there are others...

Ambulance chasers who could care less about their clients so long as they get their cut.

Defense attorneys who don't merely zealousy defend their client, but resort to silly and dishonest games like a string of continuances hoping the cop or victims won't show.

Attorneys who give bad advice to clients who are out of their practice area.

Sadly, some lawyers seem to try to live down to the stereotypes. I think it's much like cops. The small number that give the rest a bad name are the ones that get noticed.

 

[Twin Fist]

I used to admire defenders, then there was jonny cochran

I used to admire prosecutors, then there was Nifong

now I just dont know.........

 

[Kacey]

Honestly? I see lawyer jokes the same way I see blond jokes - they're not aimed at any particular lawyer, or at the profession in general; every lawyer I have ever known (including a former TKD student and a current one who is a judge in addition) has been a decent, honorable person - and one of them is fond of saying "99% of lawyers give the rest of us a bad name".

The speech was quite good, thanks for posting it. :asian:

 

[elder999]

Everyone feels the same way about lawyers, until they need one.

There is nothing like seeing a good attorney working for you, totally working the system, free of morality, scruples or judgements-completely within and part of the rule of law, and nothing but.

That said, I've met attorneys where I had to check my hand for all the fingers after shaking.....as well as attorneys who operate totally from conscience. The first sort is invariably wealthy, and the second, invariably lower middle class at best.

 

[Nolerama]

lawers= WordJitsu specialists.

Some of them can suck at life, like the ambulance chasers; but they provide a service as well. It's McLaw!

The ones I know keep on keepin' on because they feel it's important to represent those in need of real representation (immigration law, family law), even though they all hate their jobs, don't make any money, and are never seen by friends because they're always at work.

 

[zDom]

I have a cousin who is a lawyer. We were buddies as kids. But here's a story I found funny:

He and his brother were planning a fishing trip a few years back. They had some sort of crossed wires about some detail. So the lawyer says "No, no: according to my phone log we agreed..."

What kind of person LOGS casual phone conversations with a family member about a fishing trip? A lawyer.

As a kid, I wanted to be a lawyer and then a judge when I grew up. But somewhere along the line I realized there is very little, if ANY, justice in the "justice system."

It SHOULD be about who is right and who is wrong but it is REALLY about which lawyer can argue their case better.

Think about the high cost of insurance — any insurance. It goes back to lawsuits and lawyers.

All the silly warning labels and signs — it goes back to lawsuits and lawyers.

High cost of medicine? That's because of the high cost of malpractice insurance. And THAT, folks, is because of lawyers and lawsuits.

My dad got sued for malpractice once (he is the most dedicated, compassionate doctor most people have ever met in their life). Why? Because somebody's mom who was nearly 90 and dying of old age died of old age. He was vindicated — but at a great cost.

The worst part is, he loves practicing medicine but is getting near to retirement. He would love to practice part time but won't because there is no such thing as part-time malpractice insurance. By the time he paid the $70,000 for malpractice insurance (thats the last figure I heard — might be higher now) he would be better off financially to just NOT practice at all.

There are places people have to go hundreds of miles to have a baby because malpractice insurance has gone so high OB/GYNs won't practice there.

I could go on and on and on.

I'm not saying all lawyers are bad people. But as a profession, they have really screwed a lot of things up.

So sorry if they can't stand a few jokes.

/endvent

 

[Senjojutsu]

One of the better lawyer jokes I heard:

A recent study shows a new trend in clinical drug trials found that the industry was replacing laboratory white rats with lawyers.

In researching this trend it appears related to three major reasons:

1) Lawyers breed at a faster rate than rats
2) The laboratory clinicians do not become emotionally attached or have feelings of guilt experimenting on lawyers versus rats.
3) Lawyers will do things a rat would never contemplate
:boing2:

Seriously folks we hate lawyers and that hate is well deserved.

Why?

1) Because judges – also known as black robed fascists – are all lawyers. Three equal branches of government – hah! Come to think of it - most elected politicians in the USA by profession now are… LAWYERS.
2) In modern business mantra – do it better, faster, and cheaper to survive. Does that sound like lawyers?
3) Several years back I remember a very detailed series of articles on the current legal profession in that pristine state known as Rhode Island. The one detail of note for this thread was while the overall population of Rhode Island remained basically consistent from the 1970-to-2000 Census - the population of practicing lawyers (admitted to the bar) did not double. No, it did not triple – I think it was five-to-six times as many from 1970-to 2000. So they do breed faster than rats!!! But nature eventually deals with rat overpopulation we should be so lucky with lawyers.
:miffer:

 

[crushing]

Everyone feels the same way about lawyers, until they need one.

Even these guys. . .

http://overlawyered.com/2005/01/lawyer-joke-tellers-hirea-lawyer/

 

[FearlessFreep]

Everyone feels the same way about lawyers, until they need one.

That's usually because of another one in the first place.

 

[Nolerama]

That's usually because of another one in the first place.

That's the start of a Chicken Vs. Egg argument.

Could we postulate that many kinds of lawyers exist for a certain sect of litigious, stupid people? (i.e. Woman sues for burning cup of coffee) And many people sue for damages because there are lots of lawyers out there?

We live in a society where everything can be debated, itemized, and priced. We also live in a society where we can argue over damages from whiplash to murder, and get away with it.

Really, lawyers (as we see them) are the necessary evil to grease the wheels of our consumer-driven environment. If we bartered, would there be anyone suing for hot cups of coffee, or faulting some business for making them fat? No way.

Our priorities have strayed from the logical/practical, to the theoretical.

 

[Archangel M]

A lawyer falls overboard from a cruise ship in shark infested waters. As the passengers watch in horror, he is immediately encircled by sharks. Just as they expect the worst, the sharks form two lines providing a path for the man to swim back to the ship; "professional courtesy".

I have a lawyer in the family. He likes lawyer jokes. I would think they would have thicker skins.

 

[Big Don]

I have a lawyer in the family. He likes lawyer jokes. I would think they would have thicker skins.

I have several blond friends who live for blond jokes, they may not understand them all, but, they love them.

 

[Logan]

I have several blond friends who live for blond jokes, they may not understand them all, but, they love them.

Exactly People should take their work seriously but not themselves...otherwise they are ripe for parody

 

[punisher73]

Norlerama said:

The ones I know keep on keepin' on because they feel it's important to represent those in need of real representation (immigration law, family law), even though they all hate their jobs, don't make any money, and are never seen by friends because they're always at work.

Again, it's perception. I worked with the court system for about 4 yrs when assigned to the Transport Division of our department. About 90% of the local lawyers were all good people and were fun to talk with and would even help others out. There were a couple of local lawyers that were just sleazy, they would try stuff in court Johnny Cochran style to get their clients off that was just a smoke and mirrors show. It wasn't just their professional ethic either, they were sleazy human beings as well.

The two you mentioned family law and immigration law are some of the biggest money traps I have worked with. Our department deals with alot of INS inmates since we are one of the few departments that INS inmates facing deportation are housed at in Michigan. We had a case of one INS attorney who found a loop hole that said detainees awaiting deportation can still get married, although it would not stop the process and they would not be accepted back into the country. This lawyer got a couple of inmates married just to test the waters with our compliance. Then the next time two INS inmates were to be married and I had to provide security and act as a witness to the ceremony. The two women show up and didn't even know the guy's names they were supposed to be marrying and they lawyer filled out the marriage certificate for them, but used a different name on them. That way they would be deported under the name of "X", yet they would have a legal marriage with a legal US citizen under name "Y" and could come back into the country as a legal citizen. This is just one example of some of the things we have dealt with on immigration lawyers.

So, yes like every other profession you are going to get sleazy people who bring that sleaze to their profession. But, what are people going to remember or hear about? It's the bad sleazy ones. Unfortunately some professions just seem to have a higher sleaze rate than others.

 

[Ronin Moose]

I truly believe Shakespeare had it right.

 

[Tames D]

I used to admire defenders, then there was jonny cochran

I used to admire prosecutors, then there was Nifong

now I just dont know.........

Oh yeah... Johnny Cockring, what a piece of work he was. RIP Johnny.

 

[elder999]

Oh, and some really great men have been lawyers-I found this:

Discourage litigation. Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can. As a peacemaker the lawyer has superior opportunity of being a good man. There will still be business enough.
Abraham Lincoln