Soldier Skips Deployment

[MJS]

Thought this was pretty interesting. Link

SAVANNAH, Ga. – An Army cook and single mom may face criminal charges after she skipped her deployment flight to Afghanistan because, she said, no one was available to care for her infant son while she was overseas.
Spc. Alexis Hutchinson, 21, claims she had no choice but to refuse deployment orders because the only family she had to care for her 10-month-old son — her mother — was overwhelmed by the task, already caring for three other relatives with health problems.
Her civilian attorney, Rai Sue Sussman, said Monday that one of Hutchinson's superiors told her she would have to deploy anyway and place the child in foster care.
"For her it was like, 'I couldn't abandon my child,'" Sussman said. "She was really afraid of what would happen, that if she showed up they would send her to Afghanistan anyway and put her son with child protective services."

I'm split on this. Part of me feels sorry for the girl. I mean, its a parents natural instinct to care for their child. Seems like the girls mom is pretty busy caring for other family members, as well as running a daycare. Of course, I do have to wonder if there're any other family members in the area, that would be willing to offer some assistance.

The other part of me is wondering why this girl, who is in the service, who knows, or should know, that during these times, deployment over seas is a very real thing that could happen, would have a child. Did she have the child before she enlisted? If so, then that tells me that she didn't do her homework and assumed that she'd be able to stay in one spot, come/go as she wanted, etc. If she had it while she was already enlisted, then again, the above applies.

Now, I dont want to sound cold or make it seem like I'm trying to tell people when they can/can't have kids, but its really a matter of common sense here. Kinda like someone who had a childhood dream of becoming a fire fighter, takes the test, gets the job, but never wants to go into a burning building. You join the Military because you want to serve and protect your country, and for that I will always tip my hat to those very brave people. But, I find it hard to believe that this girl is the only one, out of every service man and woman in the world, that has a family or family issues. I'm sure there're men out there, overseas, who left a pregnant wife or girlfriend, who never saw the birth of their child.

 

[Ping898]

Last time I checked no birth control was 100% except abstinence. Are you suggesting that no single woman in the service have sex? What about single men who might end up in the same situation? There are lots of single dad's out there too, some I know in the military.

The way I understood this situation, she thought she had a plan in place, at the last minute it fell through. You can't always plan for that. Seemed like mostly she was not looking to completely avoid her deployment, but rather needed a little extra time to find a child-care solution as her first plan fell through.

 

[MJS]

Last time I checked no birth control was 100% except abstinence. Are you suggesting that no single woman in the service have sex? What about single men who might end up in the same situation? There are lots of single dad's out there too, some I know in the military.

No I'm not suggesting that. Are you twisting what I said to suit your needs? If so, please stop. And I beg to differ on the birth control. All comes down to how its used. Never said people couldn't have sex if they were in the service...thats how YOU translated that. Have sex, doesnt bother me at all. Men, women...God, I hope they are. If you read what I was saying, instead of twisted it around, you'd have read that I said this:

"But, I find it hard to believe that this girl is the only one, out of every service man and woman in the world, that has a family or family issues. I'm sure there're men out there, overseas, who left a pregnant wife or girlfriend, who never saw the birth of their child."

I'm saying that if you enlist and have it in your head that you'll never deploy, you're living in fantasy land, just like those that think they'll never have to enter a burning building as a firefighter or risk getting shot at as a LEO.

The way I understood this situation, she thought she had a plan in place, at the last minute it fell through. You can't always plan for that. Seemed like mostly she was not looking to completely avoid her deployment, but rather needed a little extra time to find a child-care solution as her first plan fell through.

She had someone, her mom, but as I pointed out, the mom was overwhlemed with sick family and a daycare. I also stated in my post that I was curious as to whether or not other family members were willing to step up and help.

 

[Nolerama]

This is a sticky situation. I wonder if there has been a history of noncompliance on the subject of properly housing her child.

On another note, people join the military for a variety of reasons; not just out of patriotism, and certainly not the culmination of a childhood dream to serve their country. To expect that is to expect the ideal in everything.

Many people join the military to better their lives, and the lives of their families.

From my perspective, this soldier seems to have failed in planning and was stuck between a rock and a hard place. However, I believe she should be reprimanded for her actions; just not criminal charges.

 

[MJS]

This is a sticky situation. I wonder if there has been a history of noncompliance on the subject of properly housing her child.

Good point. IMO, if someone wants to have a child, thats fine. But I also believe that the person should be ready to care for it and if they're not capable, then dont have it. Now, some will say, "Well, how can you ever be ready?" and thats a good question. Especially in todays economy, you have a job one minute and its gone the next, and your wife is pregnant. Another mouth to feed, no ins. no extra cash, etc. My point is, assess your situation. Why bring a child into the world if you can't properly care for it? If my wife and I each lost our jobs, the LAST thing I'd do is get her pregnant.

On another note, people join the military for a variety of reasons; not just out of patriotism, and certainly not the culmination of a childhood dream to serve their country. To expect that is to expect the ideal in everything.

Agreed and again, I tip my hat to those that do. A good friend of mine, who I used to work with (he moved on to another job) served in Iraq. He brought some pics. in, that he took while he was over there. He shared some story with me, and I was greatful for that. I give him credit as he told me things that I never imagined.

Many people join the military to better their lives, and the lives of their families.

Agreed. However, while those people are bettering themselves, they should not be deluded to the reality of it.

From my perspective, this soldier seems to have failed in planning and was stuck between a rock and a hard place. However, I believe she should be reprimanded for her actions; just not criminal charges.

Yes, it'll be interesting to see what happens.

 

[Ping898]

No I'm not suggesting that. Are you twisting what I said to suit your needs? If so, please stop. And I beg to differ on the birth control. All comes down to how its used. Never said people couldn't have sex if they were in the service...thats how YOU translated that. Have sex, doesnt bother me at all. Men, women...God, I hope they are. If you read what I was saying, instead of twisted it around, you'd have read that I said this:

She had someone, her mom, but as I pointed out, the mom was overwhlemed with sick family and a daycare. I also stated in my post that I was curious as to whether or not other family members were willing to step up and help.

What I responded to was this comment of yours:

The other part of me is wondering why this girl, who is in the service, who knows, or should know, that during these times, deployment over seas is a very real thing that could happen, would have a child.

You made it sound like she made a decision that she was def having a child, going to have a child during her enlistment. My point was that, the child could very well have been unplanned and a surprise despite possible precautions to avoid pregnancy....

 

[Ping898]

No I'm not suggesting that. Are you twisting what I said to suit your needs? If so, please stop. And I beg to differ on the birth control. All comes down to how its used.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparison_of_birth_control_methods#Effectiveness_of_various_methods

Birth control failure rates contained here...even with perfect use...

I'm saying that if you enlist and have it in your head that you'll never deploy, you're living in fantasy land, just like those that think they'll never have to enter a burning building as a firefighter or risk getting shot at as a LEO.

Where did she say she never expected to be deployed? I must have missed that....

 

[MJS]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparison_of_birth_control_methods#Effectiveness_of_various_methods

Birth control failure rates contained here...even with perfect use...

Hmm...interesting. My wife and I have been together for quite some time now and we have no kids. Neither does my sister and her husband. Luck?

Where did she say she never expected to be deployed? I must have missed that....

She didn't, I did. Simple hypothetical example. Kinda like those people who want to train in the martial arts, but get grossed out at the thought of kicking someone in the groin or poking them in the eyes. My point was...she is using the 'nobody is available to watch my kid' line as a reason for not deploying. Goes right back to what I said in Noleramas post....if you're not in a good position, then dont have a kid.

 

[Ping898]

Hmm...interesting. My wife and I have been together for quite some time now and we have no kids. Neither does my sister and her husband. Luck?

Yup or someone in the mix is sterile....

 

[MJS]

Yup or someone in the mix is sterile....

I doubt it. So, you're saying that everyone in the world who just uses the pill or a condom is sterile? LMAO! Thanks for the laugh today. God knows I could use one. There are millions of people who have sex just using the pill as the sole source of BC and are not pregnant. Are they all sterile too? LOL!

 

[jks9199]

It's not a simple question or case. We don't have all the details.

We don't know what she's tried, or what other options there were. The whole "go with your unit and throw the kid in foster care" sounds cold -- and I suspect it's not a faithful representation of what was offered to her. The military has become much more cognizant and much more concerned with taking care of families dealing with problems around deployments. I have to wonder if she sprung this on her command when they asked why she wasn't effectively at the airport...

I feel for her -- and I do think that something should have been worked out for her IF she gave them enough time to do it.

 

[Carol]

My cousin is serving in the Marines, and has five children. I don't think I have ever heard anyone micromanage his sex life.

The Army Spc. had to put a childcare plan in place before deployment. She did, indicating her mom was going to care for the child. Mom backed down after the plan was in place.

There are processes in place for an emergency like this. In Spc. Hutchinson's case, something broke. Why did it break? Misjudgement (or worse) on her part? On someone else's part? A little of both?

We don't know...and right now, neither does the Army. The investigation will reveal more.
.

 

[Ping898]

I doubt it. So, you're saying that everyone in the world who just uses the pill or a condom is sterile? LMAO! Thanks for the laugh today. God knows I could use one. There are millions of people who have sex just using the pill as the sole source of BC and are not pregnant. Are they all sterile too? LOL!

Look my response there was facetious, obviously lost in translation

I've got no clue what your whole point on this thread was, so I tried to respond as I saw fit initally. You seemed to suggest that if she enlisted and then had a kid alone it was irresponsible of her. I disagree. My biggest point is that I disagree seeing as how there is no way to 100% prevent pregnancy besides not having sex. If you look at the statistics there are many choices for which there is over a 99% chance that if you use BC 100% perfectly you won't get pregnant, but there is still always that small fraction that you will get pregnant and she could have been in that small fraction. If there is only a 1/2 of 1% chance of pregnancy it still means for every million who use it, 5000 will get pregnant. Even if you use no protection it doesn't mean you will definitely get pregnant. Lord knows pregnancy can be hit or miss, and depends a lot on the participants, if it wasn't, we wouldn't need in vitro or all those other methods to help people who want kids to have them, heck it wouldn't have taken my folks 5 years of trying to have me. Obviously for you, BC works great, I'm real happy for you. From what we know, for her it didn't, or for all we know she was 1 step away from the altar when the guy bailed, she never planned to be a single mom, **** just happened.

We obviously don't have all the details in this case as jks9199 and honestly I wouldn't be surprised if someone did say "so put your kid in foster care you are deploying" as a way of trying to force her to find a solution in the time left. The military as a whole does try to help families, especially in recent years, but my experience working with members of the various branches has shown me that, at the officer lower levels especially, there are at times....miscommunications of policy....in an effort to make everyone and everything conform. She could also completely be at fault in this, lying or never having told her command of the problem, wouldn't be the first time the media twisted a story to try and make someone a sympathetic victim to suit their needs.

But I still go back to this comment of yours

The other part of me is wondering why this girl, who is in the service, who knows, or should know, that during these times, deployment over seas is a very real thing that could happen, would have a child.

and take umbrage at what I feel is the suggestion that she was irresponsible just cause she had a kid as a single woman knowing that she might be deployed as part of her job.

 

[Archangel M]

Bet there are a few male's who wish they had a "pregnancy clause" in their recruitment contracts.

 

[Archangel M]

Mom backed down after the plan was in place

Or they cooked up a way to keep daughter dear from getting deployed.

..I know what I would bet on.

 

[grydth]

Cannot say I feel a lot of sympathy here....

I've personally seen all too many people willing to enjoy the status of soldier, and take the bucks & benefits..... then when its time to deploy they have all sorts of great excuses why they can't go. While I have no doubt that some happen and are genuine, the other 95% are simply chicken ****.

This does not appear to have been a sudden order, where some elite unit has to go a world away on extremely short notice. There is a lot of time and process built into most deployments, and its hard to see that there weren't many chances to address this.

What the service member(I don't consider her a soldier) doesn't seem to care about is the others in the unit..... soldiers train as a team and when one pulls a stunt like this, it can affect the performance - and even endanger the lives - of the others.

This individual will be given a speedy admin discharge and dumped at the front gate.

 

[Carol]

Cannot say I feel a lot of sympathy here....

I've personally seen all too many people willing to enjoy the status of soldier, and take the bucks & benefits..... then when its time to deploy they have all sorts of great excuses why they can't go. While I have no doubt that some happen and are genuine, the other 95% are simply chicken ****.

This does not appear to have been a sudden order, where some elite unit has to go a world away on extremely short notice. There is a lot of time and process built into most deployments, and its hard to see that there weren't many chances to address this.

What the service member(I don't consider her a soldier) doesn't seem to care about is the others in the unit..... soldiers train as a team and when one pulls a stunt like this, it can affect the performance - and even endanger the lives - of the others.

This individual will be given a speedy admin discharge and dumped at the front gate.

Sure seems like a reasonable possibility. I know the notice for deployments varies by unit, but my field guys that are in have given us tons of notice when they've been activated. One of our guys gave us 4 months notice, another was more like 8 months notice. That's a lot of time to put your affairs in order, and seek out help if you need it.

 

[MBuzzy]

Wow, this one hits home. My wife and I are both military. We are both eligible for deployment - under normal circumstances. She is pregnant right now, child due in March. We want children, but we don't want to leave them. We chose the best time and got pregnant and will be having a child. I will be deployed for at least the first 3-12 months of my kid's life. There is no doubt there. What about my wife though?

We are on 1:1 ratio of deployments now, plus 1-2 months of training up front. SO, we have two options. We can be on the SAME rotation and be forced to send our kid to one of our parents' houses for 6-8 months. OR, we can be on different rotations and send our kid to our parents' house for 1-2 months when our deployments overlap, but never see each other. It is basically a bad situation and a worse situation.

We have a family care plan, just like this SOLDIER did. Hers fell through, ours may very well fall through. My wife can't get out of her commitment and neither can I and neither can this soldier. Stuff happens and the Army has plenty of people to send in her place and it is NOT hard to work a replacement. In fact, it is commonplace. We're sending out a team and work replacements and swaps pretty regularly. Things happen.

This is not the old world of "you deploy with your unit." for the most part, people are deploying with portions of their unit, but for the most part, piecemealed units, because we are WAY too heavily deployed. Even if you do deploy with your whole unit, your shortfalls are filled from other units.

There is a procedure in place for shortfalls, for some reason it wasn't used here. The investigation will reveal it. I can tell you that there is A LOT more that we don't know. Trust me, in 7 years of working with deployments, taskings, and getting people out the door (with 8 months of that working rotations from Iraq and filling those spots), I can tell you that there is more to this story and there is a reason that she is being prosecuted.

 

[MBuzzy]

Sure seems like a reasonable possibility. I know the notice for deployments varies by unit, but my field guys that are in have given us tons of notice when they've been activated. One of our guys gave us 4 months notice, another was more like 8 months notice. That's a lot of time to put your affairs in order, and seek out help if you need it.

Not always. We frequently deploy people with less than 2 weeks notice. Army is a little better about that, but short notice taskings still exist.

The big thing is....when one soldier or airmen can't go, it gets filled with someone else. If that person drops out a week before the deployment, someone at another base gets tagged a week before they leave.

I guess what I'm saying is that things are so unpredictable that there are no givens any more.

 

[Archangel M]

The short notice/partial unit deployments are pretty much an Air Force thing.

I agree with grydth, when I deployed ALL kinds of excuses started to pop up. Color me cynical, but this story leaves me...well..cynical.