Addressing Someone's Lack of Hygiene

Lynne

Master of Arts
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
1,571
Reaction score
30
Location
Northeast, USA
We have a teenage boy in our school who apparently doesn't wash his Dobok. I think he's throws it into his duffle bag and leaves it there to sour. Not only is it sour, he has BO (or it's from the Dobok). And the icing on the cake is that he smells like he pooped his pants. Gee. No kidding.

Some of us ladies (like me!) have a weak stomach and have literally gagged when we get near him.

So, how doe one handle that situation? I thought about asking one of the black belt men to talk to him but that's probably not fair. Or maybe it is. I could ask one of the instructors?
 

EastCoastKenpoist

White Belt
Joined
Feb 2, 2007
Messages
5
Reaction score
0
Personally I believe that it is the instructor's job. It can be as simple as reminding everyone about the importance of hygiene, or if the next class he still hasn't cleaned up his act, then single him out and tell him to wash himself, his uniform, and to use deodorant.

But if people are talking about it and it is still going on, I would say the instructor is a little out of touch with his class.
 

Drac

Sr. Grandmaster
MTS Alumni
Joined
Jul 16, 2004
Messages
22,738
Reaction score
143
Location
Ohio
So, how doe one handle that situation? I thought about asking one of the black belt men to talk to him but that's probably not fair. Or maybe it is. I could ask one of the instructors?

I hope your Instructor is straight forward with his response..."Your Dobok smells".."Take it home and wash it NOW"..I was forced to ride an officer for almost a month that didn't bathe or wash his vest liner...I even clocked out and went home "sick" rather than spend another 8 hrs in a cruiser with him..When I had to go before the Lt for my reasons for clocking out I threatned to go to the media and OSHA if steps weren't taken..Another supervisor approached him and told him the to go home and wash his clothes and take a bath..He did...
 

terryl965

<center><font size="2"><B>Martial Talk Ultimate<BR
MTS Alumni
Joined
Apr 9, 2004
Messages
41,259
Reaction score
340
Location
Grand Prairie Texas
Honesty please take it home to get it clean it smells like a sewer.
 

Gin-Gin

Senior Master
MTS Alumni
Joined
Oct 25, 2002
Messages
2,496
Reaction score
6
Location
Austin, TX, USA
If I were in your place, I would mention it to the Head Instructor first, & ask him/her to make an announcement after class to remind everyone to wash their gi regularly. Then, if he still won't wash it, I'd ask the highest ranking male in the dojo to tell him to "go home & wash that thing--no odor du jour, please!" :rofl:

Good Luck, & I hope whichever solution you try works.
 

jks9199

Administrator
Staff member
Lifetime Supporting Member
Joined
Jul 2, 2006
Messages
23,473
Reaction score
3,795
Location
Northern VA
The instructors should be dealing with this. But, if it's as bad as you say, and they aren't doing anything about it, it's time for some of you to have words with him. (Given other comments about your school, they may simply not have noticed.)

Be direct, and honest, but not brutal. Depending on lots of circumstances, he may be unaware of good hygiene practices, and may just need some tips and guidance. Or he may not know how to wash his uniform... One of the adult men in the class may be able to talk to him, but a "motherly" voice might be at least as good. And you (or someone) could offer to meet him at a laundromat, and show him how to wash the uniform if it's a case of "I don't know how."

But, if things are as bad as you say, the intructors should be handling it!
 

Brian R. VanCise

MT Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Sep 9, 2004
Messages
27,758
Reaction score
1,520
Location
Las Vegas, Nevada
Honesty is always a good policy. If no one else addressed it then I would take it upon myself to do so. Of course I would do it in a nice way and as private as possible.
 

MJS

Administrator
Staff member
Lifetime Supporting Member
Joined
Jun 21, 2003
Messages
30,187
Reaction score
430
Location
Cromwell,CT
Address it with the inst. first. Hopefully they'll speak with this student. If nothing happens, then I'd say talk to him yourself.
 

Kacey

Sr. Grandmaster
MTS Alumni
Joined
Jan 3, 2006
Messages
16,462
Reaction score
227
Location
Denver, CO
I agree with the above - this is the instructor(s) responsibility, unless you have a senior student in the class who is responsible for discipline, in which case it could go to that person instead, or to both.

Whoever speaks to this boy needs to be polite but firm - if the odor is making people ill, it has reached the point that his dobok is a health risk due to the bacteria making their home within it.
 

Drac

Sr. Grandmaster
MTS Alumni
Joined
Jul 16, 2004
Messages
22,738
Reaction score
143
Location
Ohio
Address it with the inst. first. Hopefully they'll speak with this student. If nothing happens, then I'd say talk to him yourself.

That sounds like a plan....
 

stickarts

Senior Master
MT Mentor
MTS Alumni
Joined
Jul 6, 2003
Messages
3,902
Reaction score
60
Location
middletown, CT USA
An instructor should talk to the student. I have tried being indirect about it by talking about general rules to the whole class but that seldom works. It usually needs to be communicated directly to the student by an instructor.
 

Gordon Nore

Senior Master
Joined
May 26, 2007
Messages
2,118
Reaction score
77
Location
Toronto
If I were in your place, I would mention it to the Head Instructor first, & ask him/her to make an announcement after class to remind everyone to wash their gi regularly...

We had the same situation about a year ago. The air was a little foul in the dojo, and I figured out who it was coming from. I mentioned it to my teacher, who already noticed the problem. He made a general reminder to the class -- whether or not he spoke directly to the student, I don't know, and really don't need to know. Next week everything was fine.

We had a similar problem at a Yoga studio I used to go to. In that case it was bad hygiene combined with strong-smelling perfume in a room where the heat is turned up for practice. The owner put up large sign reminding all users that any scent is stronger and potentially offensive in close quarters. The studio's bathroom also had a private shower which the owner offered to anyone who needed it before class.
 

wade

Black Belt
Joined
Nov 24, 2006
Messages
695
Reaction score
19
Location
Saint Helens Oregon
I also think this is the instructors responsibility. I have had young males, US, that have no idea what a washing machine is nor what deodorant is for. I have had students from Europe, male and female, that also do not understand the concept of personal hygiene. To them personal "musk" is normal and sexy, it tends to make me gag. If the instructor doesn't tell them, then who does? The say goes "when is Rome, do as the Romans do" well, in the US, do as we do. Don't even get me started on those damn Speedo's that they like to wear.....OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
OP
Lynne

Lynne

Master of Arts
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
1,571
Reaction score
30
Location
Northeast, USA
Thanks for the advice. It is as bad as I say; the kid smells like Mr. Poopy-rotten cheese-pants. It's really, really bad. As far as the issue not being addressed, I don't know how the instructors could have not noticed. My guess is, because they're young, they may be reluctant to say anything without being directed to do so by the owner/senior instructor.

I am the kind of person who could approach him. We've become friends. I'm easygoing and "gentle" and about the only friend he has at the school. He has a lot of respect for me and I hate to blow that by damaging his ego. Then again, my nose is getting damaged! It's getting to the point where some of us ladies are thinking about stepping out of the class. A bunch of us are the same rank and will get paired up with him for wrist grips and one-step sparring combinations, too.

I'll bring it up to the senior instructor (second in charge). If they don't do anything (which I believe they will if alerted), I will be polite but direct, "XXXX, you need to wash you Dobok. The smell is making me ill. Do you need some help with washing it?" Can't be more direct or polite than that.

(I do want to make it clear that I'm not talking about a guy next to me sweating and having resulting BO. Or take the black belts - two mornings a week they have a 3+ hour training class and then go to regular class. I've been in the morning class with them. Sometimes, their deodorant fails. That's understandable. It ain't pleasant but it's not lack of hygiene.)
 
OP
Lynne

Lynne

Master of Arts
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
1,571
Reaction score
30
Location
Northeast, USA
I agree with the above - this is the instructor(s) responsibility, unless you have a senior student in the class who is responsible for discipline, in which case it could go to that person instead, or to both.

Whoever speaks to this boy needs to be polite but firm - if the odor is making people ill, it has reached the point that his dobok is a health risk due to the bacteria making their home within it.
I hadn't even thought about the bacteria issue, Kacey. And we have to do wrist grips and one-step sparring with him, too. Thank goodness, the mats get cleaned every night.
 
OP
Lynne

Lynne

Master of Arts
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
1,571
Reaction score
30
Location
Northeast, USA
I also think this is the instructors responsibility. I have had young males, US, that have no idea what a washing machine is nor what deodorant is for. I have had students from Europe, male and female, that also do not understand the concept of personal hygiene. To them personal "musk" is normal and sexy, it tends to make me gag. If the instructor doesn't tell them, then who does? The say goes "when is Rome, do as the Romans do" well, in the US, do as we do. Don't even get me started on those damn Speedo's that they like to wear.....OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Speedo's...oh, nasty! Spandex should be outlawed.

Personal musk - too bad it doesn't smell like Jovan musk.
 

Drac

Sr. Grandmaster
MTS Alumni
Joined
Jul 16, 2004
Messages
22,738
Reaction score
143
Location
Ohio
He has a lot of respect for me and I hate to blow that by damaging his ego

That was one of the biggest problems we had here..EVERYBODY was afraid of offending this officer, and it was we that suffered because no one wants to be the bad guy...



I'll bring it up to the senior instructor (second in charge). If they don't do anything (which I believe they will if alerted), I will be polite but direct, "XXXX, you need to wash you Dobok. The smell is making me ill. Do you need some help with washing it?" Can't be more direct or polite than that.

Be polite if you feel you must , but MORE important BE DIRECT...
 
OP
Lynne

Lynne

Master of Arts
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
1,571
Reaction score
30
Location
Northeast, USA
I hope your Instructor is straight forward with his response..."Your Dobok smells".."Take it home and wash it NOW"..I was forced to ride an officer for almost a month that didn't bathe or wash his vest liner...I even clocked out and went home "sick" rather than spend another 8 hrs in a cruiser with him..When I had to go before the Lt for my reasons for clocking out I threatned to go to the media and OSHA if steps weren't taken..Another supervisor approached him and told him the to go home and wash his clothes and take a bath..He did...
I can't imagine being "locked up" with someone like that in a car. Not much circulation. Gak. You'd think people could smell themselves after awhile.
 
OP
Lynne

Lynne

Master of Arts
Joined
May 4, 2007
Messages
1,571
Reaction score
30
Location
Northeast, USA
That was one of the biggest problems we had here..EVERYBODY was afraid of offending this officer, and it was we that suffered because no one wants to be the bad guy...





Be polite if you feel you must , but MORE important BE DIRECT...
True, sometimes politeness just doesn't work worth a darn.
 

MJS

Administrator
Staff member
Lifetime Supporting Member
Joined
Jun 21, 2003
Messages
30,187
Reaction score
430
Location
Cromwell,CT
Thanks for the advice. It is as bad as I say; the kid smells like Mr. Poopy-rotten cheese-pants. It's really, really bad. As far as the issue not being addressed, I don't know how the instructors could have not noticed. My guess is, because they're young, they may be reluctant to say anything without being directed to do so by the owner/senior instructor.

Yes, in that case, I'd mention it to whoever is in charge of the school.

Mike
 

Latest Discussions

Top