Toy guns and kids

[Cryozombie]

I grew up in a household full of guns, I had toy guns (back in the day when TOY guns looked like real guns... before the days of brightly colored plastic guns or even orange/red tips.), I grew up on shows like Dirty Harry and John Wayne movies (He was my dads favorite) AND I was a latch-key kid who basically raised himself while both of my parents worked.

I never played with the real guns. I never shot anyone, accidentally or on purpose. I respected the guns, and I knew better than to use them...

Why?

I'd say because:

#1 My parents taught me VALUES and RESPECT as a child. (Its ok, I grew out of them)
#2 SPANKING wasnt "abuse" and It was an excellent deterrent to doing things I was told not to do.

 

[Bigshadow]

Toy guns are not the cause of improper/unsafe firearm handling practices...however, they can facilitate them. If a child uses a toy gun to reenact their favorite scene in The Terminator, they are practicing using a gun unsafely. One can only hope that this behavior doesn't transfer towards the usage of real weapons...

Again, I think age or level of maturity is the determining factor (with age not necessarily being the same for everyone ). For instance children at an early age cannot tell the difference between reality and fantasy or truth and fiction. For example, I realized with my own son when he was very young that children cannot determine when a parent is joking with them or telling them the truth, so they believe everything. I learned I had to give him a REAL answer first, because that is what he will remember from that moment forward. As he got older he could tell the difference between a joke answer versus a REAL answer. I think the same applies to the video games and movies. At an early age they have nothing to compare it with and it can often be accepted as REAL but later they can tell the difference. So after some point in time there won't be an issue.

 

[Eternal Beginner]

My sister vowed never to let her kids play with any kind of gun. By the time they were 3 and 4 they were fashioning guns out of their Lego...so much for her vow.

My son has always played with guns, he even earned enough money to buy his own BB gun this summer. That being said, I have never, don't and will never allow "real" guns in my home. My son knows about gun safety as his uncle, who is an avid hunter, has taught him proper care and feeding of firearms, but it is nothing I will ever encourage. When he has his own home, he can do as he pleases.

I don't think it has desensitized him to violence. He is still a caring, sweet boy who can't stand it if a bird hits the window, no matter thinking it is okay to go out and hurt another human being because he played cops/robbers or soldiers with his buddies. I think parenting is the real issue, not playing with guns.

 

[hemi]

#1 My parents taught me VALUES and RESPECT as a child. (Its ok, I grew out of them)
#2 SPANKING wasnt "abuse" and It was an excellent deterrent to doing things I was told not to do.

Yes Sir.


One of the guys I work with has a daughter that is 19 now but back when she was 18 she went little nuts one night. From what he said she wanted to do something he told her no and she began to claw and scratch him so he grabbed her by the arm to get her under control. Well the police were called by his daughter and to make a long story short he was arrested. My friend spent the night in jail then had to make bail ($600). And to top it all off his daughter dropped all charges but then the state of TX pressed the issue and he spent the next year in and out of court until the state finally dropped the charges. He spent if I remember correctly about $3000 all said and done. It’s things like this that contribute to why kids can end up they way some do.

 

[Nanalo74]

If the rationale for not allowing children to play with toy guns or learn to handle firearms because they can kill or harm others, then should we teach our children martial arts techniques that can kill or harm others?

True, a bullet can kill or maim. But so can a shot to the throat or a rake to the eyes. Again, I think it comes to how it is taught to the child and the parents' attitude. If the parent has no respect for the arts and is a hothead that uses his training for the wrong reasons, the child will learn the same. The same holds true for firearms.

Vic
www.combatartsusa.com

 

[Blotan Hunka]

Little boys have ALWAYS played with toy weapons. I believe I saw wooden weapons found in ancient ruins from Rome somewhere. Some of the BEST memories I have are of running around the woods with my friends palying "war". When I got older we even shot padded arrows at each other and had shinai swords for war games. Setting war game rondevous with laser tag gear late at night during summer vacation and my friend and I stalking through the woods to find our other friends who lived on the other side. Great stuff. Most of us went on to be soldier and Marines too. They are all good people. Didnt make them crazed criminal killers or anything.

 

[Makalakumu]

Again, I think age or level of maturity is the determining factor (with age not necessarily being the same for everyone ).

I think of maturity as developmental age...and yes, I would wholeheartedly agree. At some point, this becomes a non issue. The boundary lines between fantasy and reality are more clear and (hopefully) safe usage practices have been ingrained. If my son or daughter wanted to play a shooting video game and they are 16 or 17 years old, I wouldn't object.

 

[Makalakumu]

If the parent has no respect for the arts and is a hothead that uses his training for the wrong reasons, the child will learn the same. The same holds true for firearms.

I agree. This is why I think it is so important to stay consistent with our children. We are their models and we are their filters. We are responsible for their learning...and, depending on their developmental age, their actions.

IMO, playing with toy guns isn't a problem if the child uses the toys according to the rules and regs set down by the parents. This is how I grew up and this not only helped me be consistent with my firearm safety, but it also helped me develop a healthy idea of right and wrong regarding violence.

 

[Makalakumu]

Little boys have ALWAYS played with toy weapons. I believe I saw wooden weapons found in ancient ruins from Rome somewhere. Some of the BEST memories I have are of running around the woods with my friends palying "war". When I got older we even shot padded arrows at each other and had shinai swords for war games. Setting war game rondevous with laser tag gear late at night during summer vacation and my friend and I stalking through the woods to find our other friends who lived on the other side. Great stuff. Most of us went on to be soldier and Marines too. They are all good people. Didnt make them crazed criminal killers or anything.

The fact that we mimic other militaristic societies in the past may or may not be a good thing. ALL of those societies did not last very long after the point at which they became obsessed with violence.

 

[Bigshadow]

ALL of those societies did not last very long after the point at which they became obsessed with violence.

I don't think their obsession with violence was the cause of their demise, I think it was their obsession to bring back to their society everything they conquered that caused their demise. But that is a thread of it's own.

It kinda reminds me of the "war of the worlds"

 

[Blotan Hunka]

I dont think its "mimicing". I think its natural. I think that while there is the one end where kids are becoming too obsessed with violence and on the other side theres people who want to turn little boys into something other than little boys. I dont think we are going to be able to pull the aggression out of boys without breaking them. Its teaching them what is worth fighting over and what isnt thats important. Nothing "changes" kids into killers, its the negligence of the people around them to teach them what is right and wrong. IMO I think that the whole trend towards making Patriotism a bad word has denied some boys the channel of "fighting for duty, honor, God, family, and Country". Thats all being made to sound naive so why not fight for turf, respect, money, clothes and gangs?

 

[Lisa]

I think it can be a healthy part of growing up, but you must limit it to toys and areas where the fake is not taken as the real thing and a tragedy occurs. Children have had toy guns for ages, and often real ones as well without using firearms to commit murder. Your point about real guns in the house and not wanting your children confused is a good one, though. My view is that if you limit any exposure by strict rule it will make the children naturally more curious and more likely to say yes when a friend or neighbor asks if they want to see their parent's real guns (a situation that happened to me when I was about nine).

Depends on the parents, the children, the area and a host of other issues. No one rule is good, IMO, so parents have to use their own judgment in their own individual cases.

Good post, Jon.

Sensibility is key and teaching your children the difference is important. I guess with us, not wanting the toy guns in the house worked since we had girls and girls (at least ours) never wanted to play cops and robbers, or war, etc. If we had boys, I would bet our children would have been exposed to toy guns elsewhere and our "rules" probably would have changed.

The important thing to remember, and I see a lot of that being said here, is HOW and WHEN the children are exposed to the real thing as opposed to a toy. It is important to teach the child the responsibility that comes with the real thing and it is even more important that the Adult be responsible enough not to put a loaded weapon where a child has access to it and think that threatening them with punishment if they ever touch it will realistically keep that child from it. Gun safety and responsibility is number 1.

 

[Jade Tigress]

I think parenting is the real issue, not playing with guns.

I do believe it all boils down to this statement.

 

[Makalakumu]

I dont think its "mimicing". I think its natural. I think that while there is the one end where kids are becoming too obsessed with violence and on the other side theres people who want to turn little boys into something other than little boys. I dont think we are going to be able to pull the aggression out of boys without breaking them.

In a way, I agree. However, I think that natural aggression can be channeled more constructively into other avenues that do not "train" unsafe firearm handling practices. Sports is a good avenue. So is martial arts.

Its teaching them what is worth fighting over and what isnt thats important. Nothing "changes" kids into killers, its the negligence of the people around them to teach them what is right and wrong. IMO I think that the whole trend towards making Patriotism a bad word has denied some boys the channel of "fighting for duty, honor, God, family, and Country". Thats all being made to sound naive so why not fight for turf, respect, money, clothes and gangs?

I disagree. I think that making sure toy guns are used as models of real ones is only reinforcing what the parents (should) have already taught to their kids about gun safety. The parent is being a good parent by being consistent and staying on message.

Not allowing children to play war or shoot at each other has nothing to do with loving one's country or deciding to serve it. Not allowing a child to do these things sends a powerful message about safety...that safety is paramount and that there are no exceptions. I still remember my father saying, after he caught me pointing a toy gun at my brother, "If I can't trust you with a toy, how can I trust you with a real one?" He took that toy away and he took my brothers shooting and I stayed home. This really upset me because shooting real guns is WAY more fun then playing with toys...and I still understand this lesson today.

The other message that this sends to children is that violence is a bad thing. War is a bad thing. It is not something that should be played. Both my grandfathers served in WWII, four of my uncles served in Veitnam, one uncle served overseas in the Cold War, and two of my cousins have fought in the Gulf. They were all adamant about this. As children, we did not "play" with guns AT ALL, and we learned how to be safe in all circumstances.

 

[sgtmac_46]

I was just wondering what everyone felt about kids and toy guns. Is it a good idea? Do you let your children play with them? Do you think it a good idea with the violence and the "desensitization" of your kids today?

I believe allowing your children to play with toy guns is truly a personal parental decision. We never allowed that in our home. Our philosophy was that since we had real guns in our home, we didn't want the kids to think that they were toys. They were to be respected and handled appropriately and not to be taken lightly.

However, that being said, it could be argued that even though we never allowed our kids to have them, their friends, cousins etc. may have them. For us, it really wasn't much of an issue because we had girls and not too many of their little girlfriends were exposed to toy guns, let alone the real thing.

So I figured I would put the question out to the gun enthusiasts we have on our forum. What say you about the whole "toy gun" issue. Good or bad?

I always had toy guns as a kid, I had a good time with them.....That having been said, I think the idea that with real guns, around toy guns should not allowed, is sound advice. Parents who own firearms should teach their children early and consistently that guns are not a child's toy. They sabotage this if they allow children to play with toy guns. A child should always respect a gun, and allowing them to play with toy guns undermines this.

Upnorth had some good points. I have no problems with teaching a child how to shoot. I'd rather teach a child how to shoot and respect a real gun, than play with a toy one. They learn responsibility and safety. I've had relatives children play with guns, and I correct them when they point a toy gun at other people. I make them treat a toy gun like a real one. I will not allow my own children to play with toy guns, but I will teach them responsible and safe gun handling.