Some of these things are reasons why beginners aren’t allowed to spar with contact - doing unsafe things out of “habit,” not complying with the rules due to not knowing them or thinking they’re not reasonable, etc.I appreciate everyone's comments and suggestions. I thought I'd just make myself a little clearer on a couple points. I don't see myself as an instructor by any means, and I wouldn't even describe what I do (especially in the teen class) as teaching. I will teach the younger kids basic things but the instructors actually teach all the classes. Checking kata happens in the first 15 minutes or so of class and that's really the only thing I "teach" and I only check those on katas that I am authorized by the instructor to check and if there is some question about the kata that I'm not 100% confident I know the answer too I talk to the instructor. It's just not possible for the instructor to watch everyone's kata every class there are too many students. If they did that would be all that was done in the class. After checking I'm just helping, I make sure the kids are paying attention and not doing anything dangerous. I do circulate around the class (as does the instructor) if the other students have questions I answer them assuming once again I know the answer and if I don't I once again refer to the instructor. I'll help other students that are having trouble with a technique but I wouldn't say I teach them. By in large, I'm a hall monitor in the teen class, I walk around making sure everyone's actually practicing the techniques, make sure they're being safe, and say encouraging things. I also do administrative things like take attendance and hand out information. I don't teach, I help the class run more smoothly (and not me personally but the helpers in general).
I don't think it's unreasonable for the student to take advice from another student that's been around longer than he has. Heck, I take advice from students that have been around shorter amounts of time than I have. If someone sees that I do something when I spar that creates an exploitable pattern and they give me the heads up I'm doing it, for example, I thank them no matter what color their belt is. My dojo has a very chill friendly family vibe, especially amongst the adult students. There's not a ton of ego and we all like to help each other. Somethings come easier to some people so I've helped brown belts with things that came easier to me and white belts have helped me with things that came easier to them, no one is really hung up on rank. It's more of a "Hey, if you do X it works better." There is an expectation that you treat everyone with respect. We call each other Mr. X and Ms. Y on the floor, you bow and shake hands with anyone you've worked with.
And I point out that he has self-taught himself certain things because when it's mentioned (and not just by me) to him that we don't do X a certain way (a stance that's too long, ect) the response is from him is, "It's a habit." But he doesn't seem to be willing to break those habits. And to be frank, I don't really care if he takes my advice about his stance or his kata. The only time I really care if he listens to me is when I'm monitoring the sparring groups. In that case, I'm acting as a referee. In general, the only time I expect to be listened to without question is when it comes to safety. And I don't think that's an unreasonable expectation when part of the reason I'm there is to be a second set of eyes for the instructor to make sure everyone stays safe.
I also may have been a bit a bit hyperbolic when I said I yelled at him. More correctly I yelled to him, the room gets loud when a bunch of people are sparring and then wearing headgear on top of it and I have to be loud to be heard. I didn't even single him out the first couple times, I just made general warnings to watch head contact and close hands, when he continued I did specify him by name. My tone probably was a bit sharp when I told him not to turn his back on me but he was being rude and I didn't much feel like being overly polite.
After tonight I think whatever issues he has listening to the helpers is a bit beyond me anyway. I wasn't helping tonight but I came in a bit early to warm up and caught the tail end of the teen class that he was in. They were sparring and first the helper was reminding him to close his hands, he stopped and said he did it out of "habit." She explained that the rule was to protect him and keep him from getting his fingers broken, he rolled his eyes. Then later he was sparring a teen girl (higher ranked than he) when he stopped took out his mouthpiece and began telling her all the things she was doing wrong. The instructor (though not the head instructor, who wasn't there) stepped in at that point and told to put his mouthpiece back in and finish the round. She then pulled him aside and spoke to him. I don't think that went over very well since he seemed rather sullen during the adult class (though he still did have ton of advice for his partner during the adult class as well) and after class I was cleaning up he was putting his shoes on and I wished him a happy thanksgiving I didn't get a response he just walked away from me.
I get why some schools allow students to put gear on and spar at white belt, but IMO it’s a far better idea on paper than it is in practice. Free sparring requires a student to actually show respect rather than give lip service to it. Just like I said previously, respect is earned and not automatically given. This student has clearly shown he isn’t demonstrating the respect he’s supposed to show.
Granted, few students have this issue, and fewer have this issue to this student’s extent.