Fat kid has had enough

Bill Mattocks

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Apparently, the mother wants an apology. The mother of the bully, that is. Both kids were suspended from school for four days.

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2011/0...ly-body-slammed-video-demands-apology-victim/

 

CoryKS

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Apparently, the mother wants an apology. The mother of the bully, that is. Both kids were suspended from school for four days.

http://www.foxnews.com/world/2011/0...ly-body-slammed-video-demands-apology-victim/

Sounds like she wants the apology because the video was released and the world sees her kid as a little **** more than she wants it for what happened to him.

This is very telling:

But defense attorney and former prosecutor Mark Eiglarsh said not suspending Heynes would have set a dangerous precedent.

"This isn't just an isolated incident. This now becomes law in the school. Every other kid now is free if they're bullied not to do as they're told to turn the other cheek and go to their teachers but to lift up another kid, the [COLOR=blue! important][COLOR=blue! important]bully[/COLOR][/COLOR], and slamming them to ground, risking paralysis or death," Eiglarsh told Fox News.

Yes, that would be horrible, wouldn't it? Not.
 
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Bruno@MT

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The mother fails to realize that it was her son's friend who recorded the whole incident, not Casey.

I also shudder at the 'turn the other cheek' explanation.
I don't expect anyone to turn the other cheek. Noone should be expected to meekly turn the other cheek if they are being bullied. It may not be the best solution either. Retaliating can lead to escalation. But that should be the decision of the person who is being bullied.

This was going on for over a year. So the teachers knew, and didn't do anything. If they didn't know, then it is because they didn't want to know.
If this was not resolved by turning the other cheeck during an entire year, then it is safe to say that option didn't work. and perhaps bullies would think twice if they know that if they push hard enough, they will be body slammed into the concrete.
 

yak sao

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We are turning into a culture of wusses (spelling?)
Instead of teaching our boys to become men and stand up for themselves, we are teaching them to "go tell"....I for one am inspired by what the boy did by standing up for himself. There may be hope for us yet.

True, the big boy may not have responded with the safest response, as he was on concrete, with the ledge right there, etc....the thing is these are kids. and kids do things that aren't always the smartest: running with scissors, having shootouts with BB guns, jumpimg their bikes off ramps; things we've all done, and yet somehow the human race has survived.
 

yak sao

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And that whole turn the other cheek thing....that has nothing to do with defending yourself.
That whole passage in the bible is dealing with being insulted.
To slap someone on the face is to insult them, not do real physical harm. Jesus was not advocating standing there and taking a beating.
 

K831

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We haved turned into a culture of wusses (spelling?)
Instead of teaching our boys to become men and stand up for themselves, we are teaching them to "go tell"....I for one am inspired by what the boy did by standing up for himself. There may be hope for us yet.

Fixed it for ya! :)
 

Josh Oakley

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I probably SHOULD be condemning these acts and ranting about the failings of the public school system.

Instead I watched it, like, 10 times.

That was freaking HILLARIOUS!
 
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Bruno@MT

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There could have been a misunderstanding.
The mother says she wants her son to apologise.
http://www.joe.ie/news-politics/wor...nds-apology-from-casey-the-punisher-0010597-1

Given how unreliable news sites are when it comes to sensational issues, it could actually be true that the original report was wrong. I know I would want my kids to formally apologise if they were the bully. If she indeed tried to raise her kids not to be bullies, that would seem more logical than demanging casey to apologise.

She could have said 'I want him to apologise' and the reporter ran with it, without checking who should apologise to whom.
 

Kittan Bachika

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Why do schools have the policy of having someone who acted in self defense from a bully get suspended also?

 
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Touch Of Death

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I couldn't watch the vid but I believe that if you find yourself trading punches, you have made an error in judgment somewhere along the line. Yes, people can be bullies, but leaving the scene or avoiding that person is what needs to happen over letting it get to a point where someone gets hurt.
Sean
 
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Bruno@MT

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I couldn't watch the vid but I believe that if you find yourself trading punches, you have made an error in judgment somewhere along the line. Yes, people can be bullies, but leaving the scene or avoiding that person is what needs to happen over letting it get to a point where someone gets hurt.
Sean

If this is about Casey, then I say that getting bullied and beaten for over a year means that 'running away / turning the other cheek' didn't help. I could be wrong of course, but I take it you have never been seriously bullied over a longer period of time? Your words may be true for specific scenarios. Aye. But for continuous bullying that just doesn't work and leads to many other problems, like self esteem issues, depression, and learning problems

That said, I can understand an initial suspension of a couple of days while the school figures out what went on, who did what etc. The more important question is what will happen when his the 4 days are up.
 
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K831

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I couldn't watch the vid but I believe that if you find yourself trading punches, you have made an error in judgment somewhere along the line. Yes, people can be bullies, but leaving the scene or avoiding that person is what needs to happen over letting it get to a point where someone gets hurt.
Sean

Then you are letting someone else run your life by dictating where you are and when. By them simply being there, you have to go somewhere else? That doesn't work for me. Won't live my life avoiding others and leaving a place I want to be simply because a loud mouth or a bully is there.
 

Touch Of Death

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Then you are letting someone else run your life by dictating where you are and when. By them simply being there, you have to go somewhere else? That doesn't work for me. Won't live my life avoiding others and leaving a place I want to be simply because a loud mouth or a bully is there.
Then you too would get suspended. Hey, something quite similar happened to me when I was in the 6th grade, and I punched him as hard as I could. Man that kid was mad, bloody but mad. They didn't suspend me; they knew what went down. Those were the days.
Sean
 

Kittan Bachika

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What if a kid can't run away? Then what? Do they just take a beating? What if they end up getting killed?
 

MA-Caver

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I would agree that it COULD be attributing to the problem if you make the decision to trade blows with someone wanting to inflict pain, intimidation, their will upon you. But as a victim of bullying all I know is, is that every time I fought back against a bully (win or lose) they left me the hell alone afterwards.

People who make policies like this one seems to me that they've never been on the receiving end of a bully's attention, or if they have it didn't phase them or it was a one time thing or that they simply walked/ran away and thus have it in their mind that THIS is the best ONLY way to handle bullies.

They've never been stalked by bullies, never had a bully lying in wait outside a classroom or in the restroom or along the stairway or any number of places to pounce upon them. Never had a bully ride the same bus and get off the same place as you do and chase you hard to try and beat you to your house ... because if they catch you OUTSIDE of school... then baby, it's ON! Never had a bully and his cronies corner you to where escape is just not possible. Never had a bully covertly taunt you in class, adding to the terror.

So what is a student to do... in order NOT to get suspended they're going to have to stand there and get their asses beat. Man up and take it, be a good citizen and tattle-tale, ignore it (the biggest joke of all). Reporting bullying is a good way to let the authorities of the school/work know that there IS a problem...

Sigh... it still doesn't help. What can help is this IMO.
Not suspending the victim after a through investigation of the incident (conducting it like a police investigation)... finding witnesses, using video (which A LOT of schools have now-a-days-- mine didn't). If the victim was truly defending themselves after all options are exhausted then suspension isn't going to help them.
It can help the child's self-esteem when they finally get fed-up and fight back and see that the bully was really nothing more than a real coward hiding under a facade of toughness.
It can help the child develop a good sense of situational awareness rather than just bee-bopping their way from class to class and then get jumped and end up hurt.
It can help the child to learn to THINK fast on their feet. Bullies can be double talked out of their intended beatings, they can be intimidated back in turn, they can be eluded if you think one (or two) steps ahead of them (while fleeing looking for options), and so on...

A kid isn't going to learn that by going to the office and wah wah wah to the assistant principal about big johnny wanting to beat them up.

I had an opportunity to watch the interview with Casey (the big kid) ... and while he's probably feeling a bit overwhelmed by his new found notoriety, I still can't fault him for what he did...
Consider this from a SD/MA view point...
The BEST thing about this video is that it shows Casey (the big kid), after dropping the punk ... walked away... he saw that the fight was over and walked away... he could've stayed and started wailing on the bully, kicking him while he was down, punching, whatever! But no, he ended the crap quickly, decisively and then walked away from it. He saw that it was over... that the bully wasn't going to be any more trouble.
To me, that shows remarkable judgment on his part, remarkable for a boy his age.
This is why I felt he shouldn't have been suspended.
Those who made the decision need to take that into account. IMO.
 

ralphmcpherson

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They ran the full story on a documentary over here last night. They interviewed the kid involved. He had contemplated suicide 12 months ago, very sad story. Im glad he did what he did, Ive had enough of bullies. I dont condone fighting but if my kids get bullied and they fight back I will find it very hard to discipline them.
 

Aiki Lee

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Why do schools have the policy of having someone who acted in self defense from a bully get suspended also?


Supposedly it discourages fighting, but i think that's boloney. The kids that get into fights tend to be the type that have problems at home and don't care about whether or not they get in trouble at school. Kids that need to protect themselves and are generally good kids don't like to cause trouble for themselves so they get picked on and let it continue.

I remember in jr. high and again in high school, I was challenged to fights by some thug kids, and I solved my problems through peer mediation, but I went to extreme lengths to avoid fighting, and some kids don't have that luxury.
 
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tempus

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The bully got what he deserves. I was bullied not 1 year, but years due to my size and my social habits *cough*, Dungeons and Dragons, *cough* (As my wife puts it I am a geek with muscles). Now I am 40 and everyone thinks I was a high school jock because of my size. The bullying ended junior year of high school when I sent a desk at a much larger guy and called him out. Gym class was suppose to be the fight, but he never approached me and went about his business. The bullying stopped after that. So I turned the other cheek, went to teachers, sat in the front and what ended it was me standing up for myself. If I had to reflect the TKD club I joined built up my self confidence for me to finally stand up for myself.

-Gary
 
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Bruno@MT

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Ritchard the rat speaks up

"He was like 'go to class' and stuff. And I didn't like it. And he pushed me and stuff and ran down to the front of the office and that's when I hit him," Ritchard said.

"I don't know why [I punched him] because I was just really pissed off at him ... giving me mouth."

Hmmm. Due to first hand experience, I can actually make reasonable guesses at body language in cases like this, and I really don't see Casey as someone who would push people around. He may have told him to go to class and leave him alone and tried to walk past him.

The fact that he was pissed off that someone was talking back really paint him as a) someone is not used to be talked back to and b) he saw it as cause for violence.

Asked what he'd like to say to Casey, the 12-year-old said he did not realise that Casey had been a victim of bullying.

"Sorry that I picked on him and I didn't know that he'd been bullied his whole school life," he said. Ritchard said he would go and "tell the principal" if he had future problems with older students.

"I'll go to the office."

He didn't know. Hm... Perhaps. That doesn't make his actions better.
Casey's behavior screams out low self esteem, while his is alpha male. this may have been the first time he took on Casey but they both have been in that situation before.

Ritchard said he had wanted to speak out "so they know my side as well as his".

Ritchard, who suffered a bruised leg after being body-slammed into the concrete, admitted he deserved the treatment he received.

"If I'd snapped my neck I could've died and got paralysed in a wheelchair," he said.After admitting that he had been a victim of bullying, Ritchard said his message for other bullies was to stop: "Don't bully because you end up getting hurt bad, maybe worse than me."

Interesting. This almost seems as if his change of heart did not come from empathy with the bullees, but from the realization that people being bullied might suddenly snap and piledrive the bully into the concrete.

Asked if he would bully again, Ritchard laughed and said "most probably not".

Either he has come to terms with his public humiliation and takes it all in good spirit, or he mentally added 'at least not when people are looking'.
 

shesulsa

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When I talk to kids about getting bullied, I also talk to them about what can happen to you when you bully.

I've gone so far as to punch a kid in the arm and ask, 'did that hurt?' No. Then I'll ask, 'what if I called you a name every day referring to the size of your feet or your ears and made fun of you in front of other people every single day? Would THAT hurt?' Usually the reply is silence.

Point being is that words hurt.

This kid snapped, plain and simple. While we all want to lambaste the bullying snot for being motivated to refrain further to avoid injury to himself ... that's not necessarily a bad thing. Not a dying Tiny Tim could sway the heart of the misguided Scrooge ... but his conscious did. If it's the only way he would learn, then so be it.

Now, I'msure the victim will be needing to get some anger management and PTSD counseling.
 

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