Tell Me/MT About Instances Youve Personally Seen Of A Female Being Harmed By A Male

[Cyriacus]

Im gonna continue my trend of asking weird, mundane questions when i ask them in the form of making my own thread.

This is my pursuit of seeing if this is seriously just me.
This is a breakoff of the thread:
http://www.martialtalk.com/forum/sh...he-public-perception-of-Martial-Artists/page3
Regarding posts 38, 39, 40, 42, 43, 44, and possibly a few others before that.

Huh. Every time ive seen a woman get hit (three and counting!) people look, but no touchie. Guess they may be flukes.

Also, witnesses are in favor of the victim. Remember: The court has to prove youre guilty, more than you have to prove your innocence. Gender isnt a factor in that.

Yes, actually. In Melbourne. Incidentally, if we include domestic disputes and not just bars, ive seen at least a dozen women get hit. One time, someone yelled "Hey!", then kept walking. Other than that, folks dont get involved. Plenty of wide smiles and laughter can spontaneously occur though. One time an ambulance and the police ended up being needed, to give you an idea of the severity im talking about here. Ive also seen around three (maybe four, depending on your ethics) cases of a father hitting his kid, which in one instance was female.

Im sorry the world isnt as heroic as it is on television.



How do dominance games relate to guys beating girls? You realise the two things are totally, totally different, right?

EDIT: MM! And once on a train to Brisbane. Dude tosses a girl onto her back because she wouldnt stop bothering him on the train. Someone came over and declared "Thats enough", but everyone left her to drag herself back up. She was being quite a nuisance. Its funny, because she laid there for a couple of seconds* looking at people as if she expected one of them to come over and do something.

Theres my replies, so that i dont have to repeat anything. Note that this is at least fifteen years worth. Its not like its a frequent thing that happens.

Now, this is subjective. Obviously a girl being mugged or raped is different to whats being discussed here. Id like to (but i doubt i or anyone else would be peeved if this branched off anyway) keep this limited to a male publically hitting, throwing, shoving (etc) a female.
So, tell me and MT stories. For me personally, id like to know if my experiences have somehow been limited to exceptions rather than rules so many consecutive times, and id also like to pursue stereotypes of violence against women a little bit.

Because...

When a male tries to act violently towards a female inside a bar, you can bet your life savings that a few (or a bunch, if the bar is crowded) other males will try to interfere. Many desperate alcohol-fueled young men would be more than willing to be the heroes to save the 'damsel in distress', even if the 'damsel in distress' acts violently (towards another male that's not their friends) first.

A male physically attacking a female inside a bar, no matter what, will have serious problem with the law. Many witnesses will be in favor of the female.

I wouldnt bet the five bucks in my wallet on it.

Have fun. (I couldnt think of a better way to end the post. I did try though.)

*My spellcheck (which just spelled spellcheck as speelcheck) has been playing up today. Apologies in advance. Its what i get for trying to tweak it.

 

[DennisBreene]

I honestly can't recall more that one episode of a male assaulting a woman. In this case the man was beating on the woman's car window. (She and presumably her children where inside). It was in a strip mall parking lot that was practically deserted. I drove up, told him I was calling the police, which I did, and then waited around in my car until police arrived. The couple in question had already left. Strangely in the same car. I guess their dispute was less threatening than the thought of police involvement. I don't know what happened after the police took over. Not very dramatic, but I lead a quiet life.

 

[Zero]

In my many years of mispent time frequenting bars and dens of inequity I have never seen good ol Nocturnal's scenario where: "Guy X sees Guy Q slap Girl P who is going out with Guy Q but smashed a bottle over his head (or his mate's (Guy L) head) or got lippy and Guy X driven by his sudden found fancy for drunken beligerent and generally obnoxious Girl P (with beer stains down her shirt), steps in to display his prowess to Girl P or perhaps actually to impress Girl K sitting across the bar who he has a secret crush on (but she is actually going out with Girl Z!)".

From my v limited experience of witnessing drunken tussles between a guy and a broad, most don't want to step in on a couple fighting, unless it is getting really serious and that has nothing to do with showboating at all, it is simply to stop the woman getting killed/beaten. The above scenario from Notcurnal does not sit quite right with my own experience and take on young guys in bars out to impress or otherwise. But maybe the Melbourne Nocturnal lives in has changed markedly from last time I was there taking in the musicals...

 

[lklawson]

In my many years of mispent time frequenting bars and dens of inequity I have never seen good ol Nocturnal's scenario where: "Guy X sees Guy Q slap Girl P who is going out with Guy Q but smashed a bottle over his head (or his mate's (Guy L) head) or got lippy and Guy X driven by his sudden found fancy for drunken beligerent and generally obnoxious Girl P (with beer stains down her shirt), steps in to display his prowess to Girl P or perhaps actually to impress Girl K sitting across the bar who he has a secret crush on (but she is actually going out with Girl Z!)".

From my v limited experience of witnessing drunken tussles between a guy and a broad, most don't want to step in on a couple fighting, unless it is getting really serious and that has nothing to do with showboating at all, it is simply to stop the woman getting killed/beaten. The above scenario from Notcurnal does not sit quite right with my own experience and take on young guys in bars out to impress or otherwise. But maybe the Melbourne Nocturnal lives in has changed markedly from last time I was there taking in the musicals...

Pretty much the same experience. No one wants to get involved. At bars they expect the bouncers to break it up. Out in public, they look around and wonder if anyone else will "do something." Often called "Dilution of Responsibility" or "Diffusion of Responsibility."

Most of the time, they're not strangers at all. It's usually some sort of Domestic incident.

Peace favor your sword,
Kirk

 

[Carol]

Or the bouncers in Melbourne are the one smacking women around.

http://www.reddit.com/r/JusticePorn/comments/1d29ek/bouncer_at_a_night_club_in_melbourne_punches_a/

 

[K-man]

As far as I recall I have never seen a female being assaulted by a male. Possibly the closest was a woman about twenty being detained for shoplifting who while being physically held awaiting the arrival of police, lashed out with her feet and promptly sat on the floor following a neat foot sweep. :asian:

 

[shesulsa]

Do my own experiences count?

 

[K-man]

Do my own experiences count?

Yep! Go for it.

 

[Cyriacus]

Do my own experiences count?

Sure, why not. Cant hurt.

 

[chinto]

I was there when a threat of attack to my best friend, a LADY, happened. lucky for the wannabe attacker her car door was locked and she got it started and moving. I was with in about 6 ft when she drove away. I doubt the attacker, a male would have survived my arrival had that door come open! some things are Deadly Serious, others not. I have to say that I would judge any such situation on its own merits as to who was involved and things. but they do happen.

 

[ETinCYQX]

In my experience it's usually relatively harmless men who have had too much to drink and cannot be convinced that their overpowering sex appeal is only perceptible to them.

Because I live in a small town, the bartenders at my favorite bar are relatively well known to me, I know them by name, etc. Being all relatively pretty young girls, they occasionally get a gentleman like I mentioned above who has lost sight of the fact that he's being a knob and needs to be escorted out. Four or five guys will just about always help with that.

 

[nocturnal_]

From my v limited experience of witnessing drunken tussles between a guy and a broad, most don't want to step in on a couple fighting, unless it is getting really serious and that has nothing to do with showboating at all, it is simply to stop the woman getting killed/beaten. The above scenario from Notcurnal does not sit quite right with my own experience and take on young guys in bars out to impress or otherwise. But maybe the Melbourne Nocturnal lives in has changed markedly from last time I was there taking in the musicals...

I don't live in Melbourne. I live in Sydney.

When it's a couple having an argument, sure nobody will get involved. What I wrote was: a male physically attacks a female. People will interfere and this does not necessarily end up in a fight, but the act of interfering (could be just yelling, anything to prevent him to do more damage) is there. And I did write "interfere" in my post.

By the way, here's an example of people interfering:
http://www.dailylife.com.au/life-an...e-king-hit-me-in-the-face-20130606-2nsfe.html

 

[Cyriacus]

I don't live in Melbourne. I live in Sydney.

When it's a couple having an argument, sure nobody will get involved. What I wrote was: a male physically attacks a female. People will interfere and this does not necessarily end up in a fight, but the act of interfering (could be just yelling, anything to prevent him to do more damage) is there. And I did write "interfere" in my post.

By the way, here's an example of people interfering:
http://www.dailylife.com.au/life-an...e-king-hit-me-in-the-face-20130606-2nsfe.html

People interfering always makes news.
But so far, its looking like the exception and not the rule. Which reflects my experience just fine. Im still waiting to see stacked experience to the contrary, because im perfectly willing to change my standpoint if that happens.

So far, that hasnt happened.

 

[WingChunIan]

I've seen women hit by men numerous times while I was working doors. Outside of that environment I've seen three personal assaults, the first was whilst I was at university. I was walking across a carpark in the red light district of Manchester (I lived nearby and the area lay between by digs and the town centre) and saw a woman wrestling with a man, the man hit the woman with a punch to back of the head and went to hit her again. I was young and dumb so ran over and chinned the guy. As he hit the floor the woman hit me in the side of the head and kept trying to hit me until I moved back far enough for her to stop, she spat at me and gave me a right mouthful of abuse and her noise caused a police car to pull over at which point the guy grabbed her and dragged her away. The police officer gave me a knowing look and told me to find a different route home. The second occasion was when I saw a guy first slap what I assume was his wife or girlfriend and then punch her full in the face knocking her to the ground. I was on the other side of busy dual carriage way and couldn't physically cross the road to intervene. The third time as I walked through Birmingham city centre a man punched his female companion just across the street. My wife was outraged but dragged me away to prevent me from getting involved as the woman was on her feet and appeared to be okay. Those incidents aside I've seen women get smacked plenty of times during my younger days when it used to kick off at the footie, the woman in question would normally either be gobbing off or attempting to protect a male companion who was getting a beating. Hitting women is far more common than the above posts would make it appear especially in certain social demographics.

 

[pgsmith]

Perhaps things are different in Texas. I have personally seen three instances of a man striking a woman, and the outcome was the same in all three instances. One was on the train, and a fellow and his wife were arguing (I could hear the argument, but not what was being said). Next thing I saw, was the wife falling to the ground (she had a cut lip) and the fellow was under a couple of guys that were busily beating him for it. One was in a bar. A couple is standing next to the dance floor (I don't know if they were together or not). Guy slaps woman who falls over a chair. Guy at the table that the woman fell onto helped her up, asked if she was OK, then proceeded to beat the fellow that hit her. Bouncers came and broke it up but, when they found out what happened, threw the one guy out and left the other to rejoin his table, even though he started the fight by jumping on the guy that hit the woman. The third instance was at a party at a friend's house. A guy that I didn't know was arguing with his girlfriend in the kitchen. He slapped her hard enough to knock her down. Another friend of mine that I was talking with at the time saw this with me, took three steps forward, grabbed the guy, and stuck his head through the wall. His girlfriend refused to help him, so someone else took him to the hospital to have him checked out (he wasn't very coherent at that point). My friend apologized for breaking the wall, and patched it up the next day.

 

[nocturnal_]

People interfering always makes news.
But so far, its looking like the exception and not the rule. Which reflects my experience just fine. Im still waiting to see stacked experience to the contrary, because im perfectly willing to change my standpoint if that happens.

It depends the type of bars you've seen the incident. If it's a bar is frequented by people in their 20s (where most go to the bars to pick up), it's almost guaranteed that people will interfere. If it's a bar that's frequented by older people (30s, 40s and older), maybe the third parties aren't too eager to interfere.

Perhaps things are different in Texas. I have personally seen three instances of a man striking a woman, and the outcome was the same in all three instances. One was on the train, and a fellow and his wife were arguing (I could hear the argument, but not what was being said). Next thing I saw, was the wife falling to the ground (she had a cut lip) and the fellow was under a couple of guys that were busily beating him for it. One was in a bar. A couple is standing next to the dance floor (I don't know if they were together or not). Guy slaps woman who falls over a chair. Guy at the table that the woman fell onto helped her up, asked if she was OK, then proceeded to beat the fellow that hit her. Bouncers came and broke it up but, when they found out what happened, threw the one guy out and left the other to rejoin his table, even though he started the fight by jumping on the guy that hit the woman. The third instance was at a party at a friend's house. A guy that I didn't know was arguing with his girlfriend in the kitchen. He slapped her hard enough to knock her down. Another friend of mine that I was talking with at the time saw this with me, took three steps forward, grabbed the guy, and stuck his head through the wall. His girlfriend refused to help him, so someone else took him to the hospital to have him checked out (he wasn't very coherent at that point). My friend apologized for breaking the wall, and patched it up the next day.

My experience in Sydney is pretty much the same as pgsmith's experiences in Texas. The only difference is: in Sydney, people only interfere (that may or may not end up in fights) when it's in a place frequented by young male in their 20s (bars, clubs, parties). People don't interfere in public transport or sidewalk or shopping malls, as those are not pick-up places.

I'm actually surprised that Cyriacus, lklawson, and Zero don't experience the same thing, but it could be because they attend bars where most of the patrons are in their 30s, 40s or older.

 

[Cyriacus]

It depends the type of bars you've seen the incident. If it's a bar is frequented by people in their 20s (where most go to the bars to pick up), it's almost guaranteed that people will interfere. If it's a bar that's frequented by older people (30s, 40s and older), maybe the third parties aren't too eager to interfere.

I love how youre assuming that the bars ive seen this stuff happen in have been older folks.
Mate, im not even thirty myself. I dont hang out with those kinds of people. This isnt going to be brushed off by age groups, i hang out with other young men in places young men go. These things happened in bars full of young men. I dont know how to make this any clearer.

My experience in Sydney is pretty much the same as pgsmith's experiences in Texas. The only difference is: in Sydney, people only interfere (that may or may not end up in fights) when it's in a place frequented by young male in their 20s (bars, clubs, parties). People don't interfere in public transport or sidewalk or shopping malls, as those are not pick-up places.

I'm actually surprised that Cyriacus, lklawson, and Zero don't experience the same thing, but it could be because they attend bars where most of the patrons are in their 30s, 40s or older.

Im suprised that so far you and one other person here are the only people who regularly see any interference.

Now, lemme be clear. Im not trying to invalidate you. I dont think youre lieing. But youre making out that people interfering IS WHAT HAPPENS. When it clearly ISNT. Its a thing that happens sometimes, in some places more than others. I can already hear you autopiloting to repeating yourself about age groups, to which i urge you to re-read the first part of this reply.

If you can get over the fact that your experience is not 'the rule', we can agree. Stuff will be different from place to place with different types of people (irrelevant of age). Whether or not someone knows the other person (chinto wanting to help a friend, i.e. someone he personally knew) will play a part. But to just make the sweeping statement that young men WILL intervene is trash. Also notice how ive at no point declared that they wont, because this isnt about proving myself right.

 

[Zero]

I'm actually surprised that Cyriacus, lklawson, and Zero don't experience the same thing, but it could be because they attend bars where most of the patrons are in their 30s, 40s or older.

Ouch, thanks, I only go to the 40+ clubs when I'm trying to revive my toy-boy image.
Seriously though, I hang mainly in clubs and bars I guess demographically are 20 - 35/40, quite a range. But even when I was a clubhead back in the day in much younger crowds (late teens/20s my experience did not match up with yours or pgsmith. So I don't know whether it is a geographical thing - which would be odd and is hard to rationalise, as why would Sydney and Texas be specifically the same for this type of behaviour and at the same time opposed to where Cyriacus, Iklawson and myself are and have previously lived?

I am inclined to agree with Cyriacus that what you have witnessed is legit but not the norm - but then I guess it is only the perspective of three against two so stats wise nothing can come from that...

 

[Cyriacus]

So I don't know whether it is a geographical thing - which would be odd and is hard to rationalise, as why would Sydney and Texas be specifically the same for this type of behaviour and at the same time opposed to where Cyriacus, Iklawson and myself are and have previously lived?

I am inclined to agree with Cyriacus that what you have witnessed is legit but not the norm - but then I guess it is only the perspective of three against two so stats wise nothing can come from that...

To the first paragraph, it is a stretch. The only reason i suggested it was to try to offer a neutral ground, even if it is a bit unusual.
I can theorize that since Sydney does have some pretty rough nightlife after the bars close, it might just be an 'oh look, people making a scene. lets go hit stuff' situation, but thats delving into baseless speculation.

To the second, stats is exactly why i made this thread. Its going pretty well so far.

 

[lklawson]

I love how youre assuming that the bars ive seen this stuff happen in have been older folks.
Mate, im not even thirty myself. I dont hang out with those kinds of people. This isnt going to be brushed off by age groups, i hang out with other young men in places young men go. These things happened in bars full of young men. I dont know how to make this any clearer.

It's been my consistent experience that people who are 40 now were once 30 and that people who are 30 now were, likewise, once 20. This used to be the only way but perhaps advances in technology have changed things.

Peace favor your sword,
Kirk