You won't believe the **** that happened tonight at karate.
First, let me tell you about Hofer. Hofer is this 7th degree blackbelt who is probably the second most dangerous man alive. He's better at karate than anyone has any right to be. He's scary as hell. Fighting him is like bungee jumping; its fun as hell but you know the rope (and then your neck) could snap at any second.
On my more daring nights, I call him out to fight. However, tonight, he called me out. Well, invited me to call him out. "Samantha! You want [to fight] me?" What was I supposed to say?
We go to our side of the room to fight, the left side. Someone behind me is talking to me, and I turn to listen. As I turn to face the center of the ring, I see Dave Hofer running STRAIGHT in on me with a hand blitz. When you see Hofer running at you, every muscle, every bone, every cell of your existence yells, "RUN! RUN YOU IDIOT, OR YOU'RE GOING TO DIE!"
I didn't have time to think two entire sentances though. I didn't have time to think at all. I threw an automatic side kick to his ribs, almost as hard as I could. I swear to god the sound echoed through the studio - or maybe just in my head.
I would give a month's tuition if I had a video clip of the look of absolute horror on my face after this. At this point, I DID have time to think, and I wanted to run out the room, out the door, and down the busy street wearing my sparring gear, sweaty clothes, and no shoes.
I didn't really pay attention to his reaction, because I was thinking, "Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod he's gonna kill me me ohmigod..." He stumbled back and almost fell on his butt. It was as close to undignified as I've ever seen him. One of my blackbelt friends said if it had been anyone else they WOULD have been on their butt.
Everyone was teasing me about it later though, Joe (a 6th dan instructor) had been saying before class that he wanted to fight me, but he retracted that statement, and Katya (a brown belt girl a few yrs younger than me) just started laughing at me when I walked by her, and Wes (12 year old blue belt) had something to say too... and of course Dave (black belt friend previously mentioned, not the one kicked) and Lanya (young lady blue belt). Dave who I kicked, said I nearly broke him in half. He told me it was a good kick.
I don't know if I should dance naked on the roof in celebration or wash Dave's car and bring him expensive scotch in apology.
Oh, and earlier that night I got Lanya on the back line and told her not to run into Steve (an instructor) and when she looked up at him I blitzed her (it was all in fun)
First, let me tell you about Hofer. Hofer is this 7th degree blackbelt who is probably the second most dangerous man alive. He's better at karate than anyone has any right to be. He's scary as hell. Fighting him is like bungee jumping; its fun as hell but you know the rope (and then your neck) could snap at any second.
On my more daring nights, I call him out to fight. However, tonight, he called me out. Well, invited me to call him out. "Samantha! You want [to fight] me?" What was I supposed to say?
We go to our side of the room to fight, the left side. Someone behind me is talking to me, and I turn to listen. As I turn to face the center of the ring, I see Dave Hofer running STRAIGHT in on me with a hand blitz. When you see Hofer running at you, every muscle, every bone, every cell of your existence yells, "RUN! RUN YOU IDIOT, OR YOU'RE GOING TO DIE!"
I didn't have time to think two entire sentances though. I didn't have time to think at all. I threw an automatic side kick to his ribs, almost as hard as I could. I swear to god the sound echoed through the studio - or maybe just in my head.
I would give a month's tuition if I had a video clip of the look of absolute horror on my face after this. At this point, I DID have time to think, and I wanted to run out the room, out the door, and down the busy street wearing my sparring gear, sweaty clothes, and no shoes.
I didn't really pay attention to his reaction, because I was thinking, "Ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod he's gonna kill me me ohmigod..." He stumbled back and almost fell on his butt. It was as close to undignified as I've ever seen him. One of my blackbelt friends said if it had been anyone else they WOULD have been on their butt.
Everyone was teasing me about it later though, Joe (a 6th dan instructor) had been saying before class that he wanted to fight me, but he retracted that statement, and Katya (a brown belt girl a few yrs younger than me) just started laughing at me when I walked by her, and Wes (12 year old blue belt) had something to say too... and of course Dave (black belt friend previously mentioned, not the one kicked) and Lanya (young lady blue belt). Dave who I kicked, said I nearly broke him in half. He told me it was a good kick.
I don't know if I should dance naked on the roof in celebration or wash Dave's car and bring him expensive scotch in apology.
Oh, and earlier that night I got Lanya on the back line and told her not to run into Steve (an instructor) and when she looked up at him I blitzed her (it was all in fun)
artyon: 
