Should I Return to Martial Arts

Kaien

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So I was wondering your opinions on this. So I was doing martial arts once a week before everything shut down last year. I have my first degree black belt. I do miss martial arts however I really can’t be dedicated at the moment, I have two babies, working a full time job, going to graduate school, and working on running a marathon. Unfortunately I never had the best of relationships with my Master which is another reason I’m hesitating to go back. But I was wondering what I should do?
 

isshinryuronin

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You have a couple of choices here.

1. Since you have no time and "can't be dedicated at the moment," give it up for awhile. If you can't do, you can't do it. Taking a few months (or years) off won't kill you. I semi-retired for many years, but came back with a new commitment and now am better than ever. Since you have two babies, you are likely young. A long future lies ahead with time to accomplish whatever you want.

2. If you're serious, find the time. Ten minutes a day, six days a week, gives you an hour a week - just the same as you were doing before. Rearrange priorities. If you can't, see choice #1.

Don't stress out over it. Let nature take its course. Do, or don't do.
 

Flying Crane

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First, do what you want. I suggest that if you find some spare time around what sounds like an already tremendously busy schedule, then do some practice on your own. I can’t imagine being able to, but maybe you can. You are a black belt, you ought to be able to guide your own effective practice sessions. If you can’t find any time to do that then you have your answer, it’s not the right time to get active in martial arts right now, you are too busy.

There is another issue, and that is the reality of Covid. I honestly cannot See any sense in any decision to hold group sessions, indoors at this time. We are not yet in a safe place with the virus, even if you happen to live in a place like Texas or Mississippi where all Covid restrictions are being dropped. Seriously, that is a major bit of asshattery on the parts of those governors and there is a very good chance we will all regret their negligence.

So if you are considering an indoor, group training environment, I highly highly discourage that right now, even if your governor tells you it’s ok. If the arrangement is small groups, outside with good distancing (well more than six feet as it is likely you will not be able to wear a mask all the time) and mask protocols for when you are otherwise as close as six feet, and all the participants are committed to adherence to that protocol, as well as responsible behavior at home and at work, then it could be safe. If you don’t like your old teacher, go to a different school. That part is an easy decision.
 

Kung Fu Wang

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working on running a marathon.
If you have time to train marathon, you have time to train MA. You can't run marathon when you are 80. But you can still train MA when you are 90.

I have trained both marathon and triathlon. Both didn't stop me from MA training.

I do believe that people should try the marathon at least once in their life time.

marathon.jpg
 
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Kaien

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Thank you Isshin and Flying Crane. I feel bad giving it up for awhile but it’s probably for the best since I can’t be dedicated. I do occasionally get practice on my own which I enjoy but it’s nice being in the dojo with others at times.

Wang most of my running happens extremely early in the morning or way late at night. The only time I really run during the day is the weekends which is when I’ve been doing my long runs since I don’t have work or school. While going into the dojo would be the time I would either be at school or with my kids which I don’t want to give up the time I have with my little ones.
 

geezer

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Thank you Isshin and Flying Crane. I feel bad giving it up for awhile but it’s probably for the best since I can’t be dedicated. I do occasionally get practice on my own which I enjoy but it’s nice being in the dojo with others at times.

Wang most of my running happens extremely early in the morning or way late at night. The only time I really run during the day is the weekends which is when I’ve been doing my long runs since I don’t have work or school. While going into the dojo would be the time I would either be at school or with my kids which I don’t want to give up the time I have with my little ones.

Well. you could start planning your return to MA now, but wait till after running the marathon to get going. And don't give up the time with your kids!
 

Kung Fu Wang

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most of my running happens extremely early in the morning or way late at night.
After your marathon training, your body will shrink. You will lose a lot of weight. This will help your jumping skill and you will move faster in MA later on.

Have you reached to a point that you have to put on some grease between your legs when you run?

Will you try the IRONMAN Grand Canyon running rim to rim (23.5 miles)?
 
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JowGaWolf

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So I was wondering your opinions on this. So I was doing martial arts once a week before everything shut down last year. I have my first degree black belt. I do miss martial arts however I really can’t be dedicated at the moment,
You may be over complicating it. Yes you are busy but you know enough martial arts to train on your own if your are at a black belt level. This should make training martial arts easier and at a time that works best for you, even if it's a quick 10 minute training session just so you don't start forgetting things.

I do occasionally get practice on my own which I enjoy but it’s nice being in the dojo with others at times.
I think this is the root of your issue. It's not the martial arts that you miss, It's probably the social training that you miss. So the question may not be about giving up on martial arts. I may be more about replacing getting back your social group that you once had.

Training by myself is fine, but I enjoy training with others more.
 

dvcochran

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While going into the dojo would be the time I would either be at school or with my kids which I don’t want to give up the time I have with my little ones.
I feel you just answered your own question right there.
Time and life change priorities. Maybe down the road when you are finished with school you can pick martial arts back up. Don't let it feel bad. Set your priorities(correctly) and stick to them.
 

KenpoMaster805

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Hi kaien family work school and other stuff are important so if you can't do martial arts right now then don't. If you wana go back in a year or so you can take your time don't rush.

So you don't get along with your master why? what happened?

If you don't get a long with your master go find another Martial arts that suits u you can always find a good sensie or sifu or new master for that matter.
 
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Kaien

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So you don't get along with your master why? what happened?

If you don't get a long with your master go find another Martial arts that suits u you can always find a good sensie or sifu or new master for that matter.
Hi Kenpo,

I honestly feel like that could be it’s own discussion question Let’s put it this way my Master was like a fusion between Kreese from Kobra Kai and Mister Krabs from Spongebob. He was always after my money and when I needed his help he acted like I was just a burden on him. I know we are never supposed disrespect our teacher but at what point do you move on from someone like that and what’s the best way to go about it? Even though I do miss the social interaction it is probably best for me to take a long break. And when I get back into my martial arts training I think I’ll end up trying a more defensive martial art.
 

isshinryuronin

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He was always after my money and when I needed his help he acted like I was just a burden on him. I know we are never supposed disrespect our teacher but at what point do you move on from someone like that and what’s the best way to go about it? Even though I do miss the social interaction

There is respect for a sensei as a person, and a separate respect for him as an MA instructor. If there is just one of these present, self-introspection is required to determine your priorities.

Social interaction, someone to be loyal to and a sense of belonging, or a calculated desire to simply gain knowledge and skill with no emotional investment. Either choice can be the right one for a particular person, depending on their internal desires. And, over time, your priorities may change.

If both types of respect are present in the sensei or school, you are fortunate. If neither are present, no reason to be there. If just one, like I said, you must determine what is important to you and helps you to your strategic goals. You are the captain of your own ship. There is no right or wrong as long as you are true to yourself.
 

drop bear

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Hi Kenpo,

I honestly feel like that could be it’s own discussion question Let’s put it this way my Master was like a fusion between Kreese from Kobra Kai and Mister Krabs from Spongebob. He was always after my money and when I needed his help he acted like I was just a burden on him. I know we are never supposed disrespect our teacher but at what point do you move on from someone like that and what’s the best way to go about it? Even though I do miss the social interaction it is probably best for me to take a long break. And when I get back into my martial arts training I think I’ll end up trying a more defensive martial art.

Taking time off from covid and just moving on to something else. Would be one of the easier ways of addressing that.
 

Prostar

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What's the rush? I am thinking of starting back after 35 years on and 18 years off. Once the covid thing has passed I will go after it.

So you can take your time and be aware that MA will be waiting for you.
 

KenpoMaster805

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Hi Kenpo,

I honestly feel like that could be it’s own discussion question Let’s put it this way my Master was like a fusion between Kreese from Kobra Kai and Mister Krabs from Spongebob. He was always after my money and when I needed his help he acted like I was just a burden on him. I know we are never supposed disrespect our teacher but at what point do you move on from someone like that and what’s the best way to go about it? Even though I do miss the social interaction it is probably best for me to take a long break. And when I get back into my martial arts training I think I’ll end up tr
ying a more defensive martial art.

I guess your instructor only want u for the money. A master suppose to help the student not to be a burden to the master. If my instructor is like that i would leave or quit and not come back. My instructor would always say to his student if you have question regarding your technique sets or form don't hesitate to ask.

What he does is show the technique for today twice he will let u know if your doing it right or wrong and if you have question for that technique he will do it again. H would even ask what technique you haven't learn yet and he will do that technique.
 

Kemposhot

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Always make time for the kids. They’re only young once, and they change so much so fast as they grow.

I’m not sure how old they are, but I noticed while practicing during covid that my 5 year old daughter was copying me while i was doing forms. I began to show her stuff and have fun with it while we did it together. Not to mention a great review for me. Perhaps one of the most positive things to come from the Quarantine and my favorite memory thus far from it.
 

isshinryuronin

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Always make time for the kids. They’re only young once, and they change so much so fast as they grow.

I’m not sure how old they are, but I noticed while practicing during covid that my 5 year old daughter was copying me while i was doing forms. I began to show her stuff and have fun with it while we did it together. Not to mention a great review for me. Perhaps one of the most positive things to come from the Quarantine and my favorite memory thus far from it.

For the under 7 group, the best learning is when kids don't even know they're learning. They just naturally copy Mom and Dad. IMO, regimented classes by an instructor for 4, 5, 6 year olds is little more than baby sitting as they are not "programmed" to copy the instructor as they are their parents. Kid this age want to be like mommy and daddy - enjoy it, for in another ten years they will want to be the opposite!

Small kids don't judge their parents as right or wrong, they are only predisposed to copy them. This is scary. As parents, we must always keep this in mind and act the way we want our kids to. If so, our own moral compass will point straight and put our kids on the right path.
 

Ivan

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So I was wondering your opinions on this. So I was doing martial arts once a week before everything shut down last year. I have my first degree black belt. I do miss martial arts however I really can’t be dedicated at the moment, I have two babies, working a full time job, going to graduate school, and working on running a marathon. Unfortunately I never had the best of relationships with my Master which is another reason I’m hesitating to go back. But I was wondering what I should do?
Regardless of what anyone tells you, the reality is that you will regret not having tried to return, much, much more than attempting to return and finding out it's not for you.
 

Hanshi

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First, a couple of thoughts. Until the threat of covid-19 is gone it won't hurt to refrain from training in a group/dojo setting. You're not likely to suffer any from taking a break from training since it's not practical for you at this time. In a few months or a year or so things may change and new possibilities open for you.

I've been teaching since 1974 (currently retired). I firmly believe that any instructor not personally concerned and invested in the well being of of each individual student and his/her progress is a barrier to that student's progress and not worthy of being that student's teacher. I cared about each one of my students and they knew it. Even their welfare beyond the dojo was important to me. When you do start back, by all means find another teacher.
 

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