So another thread in the locker room reminded me of a question that could make for a good discussion, and maybe some surprises.
My wife is very intelligent, but she is also very beautiful. Of course, while she appreciates the attention her looks get her, it quickly becomes loathsome if it detracts from the respect for her intelligence.
Basically she would rather be admired/respected for her intelligence than her looks. And I believe her, it's not one of those "I hate it when people tell me I'm so beautiful" attention stunts. It disgusts her to only be noticed for looks.
So we were watching a movie the other night, where the heroine enters the scene in a slinky evening gown, all done up, and all the men in the room are leering at her. She says "how would you feel if you were treated like that?"
My first thought was "I would LOVE IT!" And I told her so. Which started an interesting discussion. I've polled a couple of my guy friends about this, but no other women, but all of the guys agreed -- to be able to walk into a room full of confident, powerful women, and be able to turn their heads by our looks alone would be so much fun -- it's just not gonna happen, though.
Now the questions for discussion:
1. Is this a surprise to other women here?
2. Do other men feel this way?
3. Is it because men are "sight-oriented" when it comes to romance/sex that they want to be desirable by sight?
4. Or is it that we just want what we don't have - since men in our society aren't considered to be generally "good looking" on their own, but character matters, that if we got that, we would hate it, too?
The discussion ended with me, mock-poutingly, insisting: "Don't only pay attention to my brains! I have a body, too y'know!"
My wife is very intelligent, but she is also very beautiful. Of course, while she appreciates the attention her looks get her, it quickly becomes loathsome if it detracts from the respect for her intelligence.
Basically she would rather be admired/respected for her intelligence than her looks. And I believe her, it's not one of those "I hate it when people tell me I'm so beautiful" attention stunts. It disgusts her to only be noticed for looks.
So we were watching a movie the other night, where the heroine enters the scene in a slinky evening gown, all done up, and all the men in the room are leering at her. She says "how would you feel if you were treated like that?"
My first thought was "I would LOVE IT!" And I told her so. Which started an interesting discussion. I've polled a couple of my guy friends about this, but no other women, but all of the guys agreed -- to be able to walk into a room full of confident, powerful women, and be able to turn their heads by our looks alone would be so much fun -- it's just not gonna happen, though.
Now the questions for discussion:
1. Is this a surprise to other women here?
2. Do other men feel this way?
3. Is it because men are "sight-oriented" when it comes to romance/sex that they want to be desirable by sight?
4. Or is it that we just want what we don't have - since men in our society aren't considered to be generally "good looking" on their own, but character matters, that if we got that, we would hate it, too?
The discussion ended with me, mock-poutingly, insisting: "Don't only pay attention to my brains! I have a body, too y'know!"