How to confront someone lying about knowing martial arts?

drop bear

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I've been ignoring that thread, and it is too long at this point for me to catch up...are the people who are complaining about his credentials in there the same ones that are telling FJ just to let it go?

It is sort of. op has asked if he should worry about some kid who thinks who thinks he is the business. Now most people have said don't worry.

Untill......

Op mentioned that he has dedicated his life to martial arts. And people are worrying. Because reasons.

As i said there is a scale.
 

Jenna

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It is sort of. op has asked if he should worry about some kid who thinks who thinks he is the business. Now most people have said don't worry.

Untill......

Op mentioned that he has dedicated his life to martial arts. And people are worrying. Because reasons.

As i said there is a scale.
I like how you are clever to watch and observe.. I can ask please what do you mean by because reasons? Means there is no good reason for it?? or something else??? thank you
 
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FlamingJulian

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Yesterday, I saw a group of people wrestled on the grass in the park. I walked over.

A: Are you guys doing wrestling?
B: Yes, we are.
A: I like wrestling too. Can I wrestle with you or your guys?

I wrestled with him and his guys on the grass and had good time. We shake hands after the matches and set up time to meet again.

To have friendly match even between strangers is not "fighting".

So? Ur right that's not fighting. I never said THAT^^ was. That's playing sports


-Julian
 

drop bear

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I like how you are clever to watch and observe.. I can ask please what do you mean by because reasons? Means there is no good reason for it?? or something else??? thank you

Because "reasons" is because resons i dont really care about. So I am not really worried if op has a friend who thinks he is Chuck Norris. I am also not worried if op is dedicating his life to martial arts at 16. And whether or not that is enough life to be considered dedication.

See when you are looking at someone and thinking that they are a chocolate teapot of a martial artist. Someone is looking at you and thinking the same thing.

It is funny because that is what i meant at the outset that it is a scale. and then was actually demonstrated on the thread.
 

Jenna

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Because "reasons" is because resons i dont really care about. So I am not really worried if op has a friend who thinks he is Chuck Norris. I am also not worried if op is dedicating his life to martial arts at 16. And whether or not that is enough life to be considered dedication.

See when you are looking at someone and thinking that they are a chocolate teapot of a martial artist. Someone is looking at you and thinking the same thing.

It is funny because that is what i meant at the outset that it is a scale. and then was actually demonstrated on the thread.
You are someone who does not accept no nonsense I think.. Like they say you have not time for fools :) thank you for your explanation :)

Haha chocolate teapot. Filled with hot vodka maybe :)
 

Balrog

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First of all, should I? This 14yr old kid claims to take Kung Fu AND Boxing yet couldn't show me a thing about what he's learned. Couldn't show me any of his belts or certificates and claims to have both, belts and certificates. I dedicate my life to something and then someone is going to lie about knowing this stuff.... in my opinion i should confront him and he is wrong for doing that. Any opinions?
I've actually been in a somewhat similar situation. Guy was not being obnoxious about it, but was really operating the BS shovel at full power. I just smiled and nodded, until he said something so outrageous and wrong that I couldn't help laughing out loud at it. He got that offended look on his face and asked me what was so funny. I just handed him a business card and told him to come train with me when he was ready to learn some real martial arts. The other people around started laughing and he stormed off.

It was somewhat amusing.
 

oftheherd1

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Why are people thinking this post 'funny'? A teenager has sent me ( someone he doesn't know) a photograph with certificates with his name on and other personal information which can be used for various purposes including identity theft, cyber bullying and online grooming and you guys think it funny because I warned him? Good grief, that's low, does safeguarding mean nothing to some people?

/preventing-abuse/keeping-children-safe/online-safety/

You may have come on a little strong with F-J, considering you have been on this board for a long time and are very respected. But I think you are quite correct. Especially since he publicly told everyone who reads this that he sent you a PM with that type of information, you are correct imho, to publicly tell him you don't want it and are deleting it.

F-J, if you read this, and consider it necessary to send a PM, and you are sure you can trust the person, I suggest you PM them first to see if they want it, then PM them without making a public announcement about it. You also need to rethink you maturity in having done that. As someone has already said, nobody here has said they doubt you, nor demanded you prove anything about your training or abilities.

I don't intend any of the above as a put down, simply something to contemplate as you go through your life's journey.

EDIT --Tez3: I meant to add I am also puzzled as to why people thought you post funny. I thought it informative for F-J, even if a tad strong. But obviously you feel strong about it. Nuff said.
 
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dowz

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I think OP, this ties in with another thread you started about being of a certain age to test for black belt, and should people be made to wait to be 18? to qualify to test for black belt.

IMHO, being a black belt is not entirely about being skilled, about being how fast/how powerful you are.
It's also about having the maturity to deal with situations.... like this...

No offense intended, it is all part of growing up, and continuing on in our martial arts journey.
 

Headhunter

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I think OP, this ties in with another thread you started about being of a certain age to test for black belt, and should people be made to wait to be 18? to qualify to test for black belt.

IMHO, being a black belt is not entirely about being skilled, about being how fast/how powerful you are.
It's also about having the maturity to deal with situations.... like this...

No offense intended, it is all part of growing up, and continuing on in our martial arts journey.
Very good point I wouldn't expect a black belt to be getting in a row in the playground over someone's credentials
 
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FlamingJulian

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I've actually been in a somewhat similar situation. Guy was not being obnoxious about it, but was really operating the BS shovel at full power. I just smiled and nodded, until he said something so outrageous and wrong that I couldn't help laughing out loud at it. He got that offended look on his face and asked me what was so funny. I just handed him a business card and told him to come train with me when he was ready to learn some real martial arts. The other people around started laughing and he stormed off.

It was somewhat amusing.

Lollol! That's funny. If I ever open a business or work for one I'll do the same lol


-Julian
 

jks9199

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Going back to the OP...

Why confront them? Are they hurting anyone with their claims? Are they hurting you?

If their lies are hurting you or someone else, you may have a responsibility to do something about them -- but if not? Why confront them?

If their stories aren't hurting you or someone else, then what is the benefit of confronting them? Who gains from your confrontation? Take a moment -- because the answer is probably going to boil down to your ego. Which leads to a parallel question: who is hurt by confronting them?

Yeah -- those two questions probably lead to an answer that amounts to you get to boost your own ego at the cost of theirs. So... is that who you want to be?
 

Tez3

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You may have come on a little strong with F-J, considering you have been on this board for a long time and are very respected. But I think you are quite correct. Especially since he publicly told everyone who reads this that he sent you a PM with that type of information, you are correct imho, to publicly tell him you don't want it and are deleting it.

F-J, if you read this, and consider it necessary to send a PM, and you are sure you can trust the person, I suggest you PM them first to see if they want it, then PM them without making a public announcement about it. You also need to rethink you maturity in having done that. As someone has already said, nobody here has said they doubt you, nor demanded you prove anything about your training or abilities.

I don't intend any of the above as a put down, simply something to contemplate as you go through your life's journey.

EDIT --Tez3: I meant to add I am also puzzled as to why people thought you post funny. I thought it informative for F-J, even if a tad strong. But obviously you feel strong about it. Nuff said.

I considered stronger because frankly he scared me. In the job I did before I've seen the consequences of young people who trusted someone online, in a case I'm thinking about the end result was the suicide of the teenage boy, as a parent and Girl Guide leader it made me shudder that someone could be so trusting as to send personal details to someone off the internet so easily. I wanted to shock and bring him up sharp because I was scared for him, I really wanted him not to do this. I'm sorry if it came across as harsh but I was also afraid he'd laugh it off. Sometimes parents are just over react because they worry.
 

Headhunter

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They do love a dojo storm. Especially with a fake bjj school.
Sure at dojos fine but not starting a fight with a guy who's meant to be your friend over it. What happens in the dojo stays in the dojo but a black belt should know better than to start something outside the dojo
 

drop bear

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Sure at dojos fine but not starting a fight with a guy who's meant to be your friend over it. What happens in the dojo stays in the dojo but a black belt should know better than to start something outside the dojo

Same thing really.
 

drop bear

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Not at all in the dojo it's sparring outside the dojo it's a fight where anything can happen and someone can get seriously hurt even if it's not the intention

No such thing as sparring in that situation. It is a fight.

You don't call out a fake belt in his own club and then spar with them.
 

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