Hot head rolling partner

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Headhunter

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If he is a danger to other students there is always the option of telling him to either shape up or take a hike.
Yeah sure that's fine but that's the instructors job to do that and my main issue is instead of doing that he instead rewarded him for his behaviour by promoting him and it's not just me loads of people have said the same thing about him
 

Gnarlie

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Oh okay I'll just let him punch me in the face and try and talk in between punches and hope I'm not knocked out before finishing my mr miyagi speech. The kid wouldn't listen to me he thinks he's better than everyone he'd just ignore it I mean he's ignored the instructor so he's not going to listen to me and yeah if someone attacks me I'm defending myself I'm not going to attack first but if he swings on me I'm defending myself that's what martial arts is self defence and self defence isn't letting someone punch you in the face
Self defence is avoidance first. He hasn't punched you (yet), so you could be taking steps to avoid and prevent.

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Gnarlie

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Well yeah....of course I don't...it's a word and I'll use what words I like I'm who I am I don't pretend to be something I'm not. I say my opinions and if people don't like that then that's their choice lol SCUMMY I can't believe you're upset over that word it's not a swear word it's discriminating against someone it's a word deal with it
I'm not upset. I'm saying your choice of words is telling.

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Gerry Seymour

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And yet so far you have thought about punching him, gouging his eye, and breaking his arm, rather than talking to him. That's not handling him. That's failing to handle him.

Sounds like partly your issue dude.

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Actually, he pretty much said he wouldn't do those things just to make a point. Someone else was suggesting some moderately violent responses to the kid's actions.
 

Gnarlie

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Actually, he pretty much said he wouldn't do those things just to make a point. Someone else was suggesting some moderately violent responses to the kid's actions.
He's said repeatedly that he can handle the guy and that he'll resort to violence if he needs to.

And yet is unwilling to take the step to talknto him about it before that has to happen.

That's a failure to handle it IMO.


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Actually, he pretty much said he wouldn't do those things just to make a point. Someone else was suggesting some moderately violent responses to the kid's actions.
Exactly I'm not going to hurt anyone just to win a silly sparring match. I have no desire to hurt anyone especially a kid but on the other hand if I'm attacked and put in a position where I could be hurt because of stupidity then of course I'll defend myself and do what I need to do to keep myself safe. I mean that's just common sense
 

Gerry Seymour

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He's said repeatedly that he can handle the guy and that he'll resort to violence if he needs to.

And yet is unwilling to take the step to talknto him about it before that has to happen.

That's a failure to handle it IMO.


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You and I are reading his responses differently. I see it as him saying he doesn't feel like he's in danger - so no need for heavy response - but he feels like he could (and would) do what he had to if the guy seemed intent on doing actual damage.
 

jobo

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He's said repeatedly that he can handle the guy and that he'll resort to violence if he needs to.

And yet is unwilling to take the step to talknto him about it before that has to happen.

That's a failure to handle it IMO.


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I agree that a gentle word telling him to calm down a bit is worth a try ? I've had to " calm down a bit" in my class, I had no intent in hurting anyone, but hadn't taken in to account that some of my class mates were precious snowflakes that had an adversion on to rough play or what I would consider as rough play if done to me, had then quaking. perhaps that the problem here and he should make it plain that he should be treated a lot more gently
 
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Buka

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Actually, he pretty much said he wouldn't do those things just to make a point. Someone else was suggesting some moderately violent responses to the kid's actions.

Hey, just a little Karma for the young fella'. F him, the horse he rode in on, and anyone else who allows that.
 

drop bear

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He's said repeatedly that he can handle the guy and that he'll resort to violence if he needs to.

And yet is unwilling to take the step to talknto him about it before that has to happen.

That's a failure to handle it IMO.


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Individual responsibility always seems to mean someone else's responsibility.
 

drop bear

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If they are rolling with me then they are not rolling with someone they might hurt.

I have no issue chasing them around all day and smeshing them until they can figure out how to play nice.
 

TSDTexan

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Fine the whole gym is victim to one toxic white belt.

Leave and find a better gym.

i dont often find myself agreeing whole heartedly with you. but this is one of those times i do.

i would start with a written formal notice.
something like:

Hey coach, we have talked about student X, and his ongoing unsafe rolls. Nothing has changed.
This is where I extend the courtesy of letting you know, first, that I am scouting for a new gym. I would like to stay, but you have to do something about the loose cannon on deck.

i dont want him to hurt himself, others, or me... nor do I desire to hurt him.

best of luck, sincerely
HH

PS... its not you. its not me. It's him.
 

TSDTexan

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Exactly I'm not going to hurt anyone just to win a silly sparring match. I have no desire to hurt anyone especially a kid but on the other hand if I'm attacked and put in a position where I could be hurt because of stupidity then of course I'll defend myself and do what I need to do to keep myself safe. I mean that's just common sense

question for you Headhunter... how good are your blood flow chokes?... (Note.. I am not asking about air flow chokes.)

The reason I ask... is because i ran your situation by some Brazilian and Korean instructors and more then few said if a guy was dangerous on the matts, and the chief instructor was turning a blind eye (or encouraging it on the sly with promotions), and if they were in your shoes, they would start giving him naps.

but i would wait until he turned 18, or find a better gym.
 
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Monkey Turned Wolf

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question for you Headhunter... how good are your blood flow chokes?... (Note.. I am not asking about air flow chokes.)

The reason I ask... is because i ran your situation by some Brazilian and Korean instructors and more then few said if a guy was dangerous on the matts, and the chief instructor was turning a blind eye (or encouraging it on the sly with promotions), and if they were in your shoes, they would start giving him naps.

but i would wait until he turned 18, or find a better gym.
I would not do this. ESPECIALLY if he is under 18, but even if hh waits, i still wouldn't do this. Choking someone out in a school where that is not the norm in rolling is only going to start drama/trouble.

It may be different for those instructors, because they are instructors, and OP is not, but i wouldnt ever recommend choking someone out who is not agreeing to be/risk being choked out during a roll. And i get the feeling the KID in hh's school is someone who'd make a big deal about it.
 

TSDTexan

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I would not do this. ESPECIALLY if he is under 18, but even if hh waits, i still wouldn't do this. Choking someone out in a school where that is not the norm in rolling is only going to start drama/trouble.

It may be different for those instructors, because they are instructors, and OP is not, but i wouldnt ever recommend choking someone out who is not agreeing to be/risk being choked out during a roll. And i get the feeling the KID in hh's school is someone who'd make a big deal about it.

Yeah, most people wouldn't keep training at a gym with a loose cannon on deck either. Sooner or later someone will get hurt, and they will make a big deal about it.

I know if I was a guest rolling in some other's guys school, I would just let the guy tap me and find a new partner. HH could also refuse to roll with him until he gets his act right.

As for starting trouble or drama... its a little bit late for that. I worry that this guy will be a real liability and community danger as his skillset develops.
My next question... is with his attitude, will he respect the tap? if he is neck cranking... I am dubious. This isnt just some guy spazzing out... this is predatory behavior.

better schools would have 86'd him by now... or dialed up the pressure so as to make him quit. e.g. limit him to brown and bb only.

JJ is supposed to teach humility through the 200,000 taps or more. But if ego isn't checked by repeated failures, then you just have a guy whose going to hurt someone.
 
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drop bear

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question for you Headhunter... how good are your blood flow chokes?... (Note.. I am not asking about air flow chokes.)

The reason I ask... is because i ran your situation by some Brazilian and Korean instructors and more then few said if a guy was dangerous on the matts, and the chief instructor was turning a blind eye (or encouraging it on the sly with promotions), and if they were in your shoes, they would start giving him naps.

but i would wait until he turned 18, or find a better gym.

Knee rides.

Or just really solid top pressure in general.
 

Monkey Turned Wolf

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Yeah, most people wouldn't keep training at a gym with a loose cannon on deck either. Sooner or later someone will get hurt, and they will make a big deal about it.

I know if I was a guest rolling in some other's guys school, I would just let the guy tap me and find a new partner. HH could also refuse to roll with him until he gets his act right.

As for starting trouble or drama... its a little bit late for that. I worry that this guy will be a real liability and community danger as his skillset develops.
My next question... is with his attitude, will he respect the tap? if he is neck cranking... I am dubious. This isnt just some guy spazzing out... this is predatory behavior.

better schools would have 86'd him by now... or dialed up the pressure so as to make him quit. e.g. limit him to brown and bb only.

JJ is supposed to teach humility through the 200,000 taps or more. But if ego isn't checked by repeated failures, then you just have a guy whose going to hurt someone.
Thats all true, but also not HH's job to handle. Its the instructors. And HH shouldn't be putting himself at risk (which he would be) as a 40ish year old(i think, might be wrong) civilian choking a 17year old in a school where thats degrees up from the normal level of violence. I agree he should either leave the school or refuse to roll with the kid, but don't see choking the kid out, even with a blood choke, helping him out at all.
 
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Headhunter

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Yeah, most people wouldn't keep training at a gym with a loose cannon on deck either. Sooner or later someone will get hurt, and they will make a big deal about it.

I know if I was a guest rolling in some other's guys school, I would just let the guy tap me and find a new partner. HH could also refuse to roll with him until he gets his act right.

As for starting trouble or drama... its a little bit late for that. I worry that this guy will be a real liability and community danger as his skillset develops.
My next question... is with his attitude, will he respect the tap? if he is neck cranking... I am dubious. This isnt just some guy spazzing out... this is predatory behavior.

better schools would have 86'd him by now... or dialed up the pressure so as to make him quit. e.g. limit him to brown and bb only.

JJ is supposed to teach humility through the 200,000 taps or more. But if ego isn't checked by repeated failures, then you just have a guy whose going to hurt someone.
I don't see how going hard on a kid and bullying him into quitting makes it a good school. Tbh that crap sounds like bullies from the football bullying the nerdy kid so they don't play anymore.

Doesn't sound like there's much humility there
 
OP
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Headhunter

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question for you Headhunter... how good are your blood flow chokes?... (Note.. I am not asking about air flow chokes.)

The reason I ask... is because i ran your situation by some Brazilian and Korean instructors and more then few said if a guy was dangerous on the matts, and the chief instructor was turning a blind eye (or encouraging it on the sly with promotions), and if they were in your shoes, they would start giving him naps.

but i would wait until he turned 18, or find a better gym.
Yeah there's no way in hell im doing that. Whether it's a 17 year old or a 37 year old that's just a dick move trying to intentionally choke someone unconscious, all that would do is be a move to satisfy my ego and the fact that other instructors said to do that is extremely concerning and they shake be looked at if they think that's acceptable in any way
 

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