French Military History in a Nutshell

[Josh]

Q. Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney?

A. Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.

:lol: funny stuff

but waitttt.. they do in fact have fireworks at Euro Disney


http://www.pbase.com/tineke/image/26132658

 

[Blotan Hunka]

Q: How can you identify a French Infantryman?
A: Sunburned armpits.

 

[Josh]

*bows*

you win. I have nothing for this one.
:boing1:

 

[Josh]

*notices the irony in giving up*
:shock: i'll just zap you instead. take that!! muahhah.

 

[CTKempo Todd]

Yes.
I challenge all of you that have thrown jokes out there to go read a book on the revolutionary war and figure out why none of you have British accents today. You may learn something.

BTW,
I had the oppurtunity in high school to be an exchange student and spent a month in France. I visited the beaches/museums/grounds/American Cemetary where D-Day took place and it will go down as one of the most incredible experiences in my life. I was 17 at the time (1986) and I will never forget it.

 

[Blotan Hunka]

This is the comedy forum isnt it? Chill.

 

[Blotan Hunka]

Q. What's the difference between Frenchmen and toast?

A. You can make soldiers out of toast.

 

[Blotan Hunka]

 

[Tames D]

I'm German and my wife is French. So we hear all the jokes and my wife and her family have a great sense of humor about it which I find pretty cool. Just 2 comments:

1. The French turn out the best looking women, lol.
2. My wifes uncles and cousins are the best fighters I've ever seen. I would be crazy to call them cowards, lol.

 

[Blotan Hunka]

I have some French in the woodpile too. Ancestors were French Fur trappers, But Im an American, so what do I care about some French Army jokes??

 

[exile]

[*]My wifes uncles and cousins are the best fighters I've ever seen. I would be crazy to call them cowards, lol.

My second cousin Henri, the Free French paratrooper I mentioned earlier, was also accounted a ferocious fighter in his youth—you didn't last long in that company unless you were—and he's the one to go to for stories of the corruption and cowardice in the French military hierarchy during WWII, the active collaboration between the German SS and the Vichy military getting their own back on the Jews because the army officers corps' lies in framing Dreyfus had come to light half a century earlier, Dreyfus had been exhonerated and eventually made Chevalier of the Legion of Honor, and they were going to gve payback for that by helping send thousands of people to be gassed in concentration camps in Poland. The Free French were tough as nails, and the biggest threat they faced was in betrayal by their own countrymen, who sent the best and bravest of the Resistance, like Jean Moulin, to their deaths at the hands of the Gestapo.

My cousin spent three years fighting in North Africa, and when he returned to France was amazed to discover that most of the comfortable bourgeousie, who had done so well during the Occupation, turned out, by their own admission, to have been `working with the Resistance all along'. Funny, that...

 

[CTKempo Todd]

This is the comedy forum isnt it? Chill.

Point taken...However I believe it got away from being comedy when some of the posts went to a more political slant...

 

[Blotan Hunka]

French Army Knife

 

[CTKempo Todd]

French Army Knife

THAT WAS GOOD! ...LOL

 

[Josh]

haha, yes very good indeed. I can take the joke aspect of it, its when it starts to get into prejudice that I start taking offence. I'm assuming everyone throwing out french jokes would be able to take it if their heritage was attacked jokingly too. it's all in good fun.

nice thread :]

 

[Xue Sheng]

haha, yes very good indeed. I can take the joke aspect of it, its when it starts to get into prejudice that I start taking offence. I'm assuming everyone throwing out french jokes would be able to take it if their heritage was attacked jokingly too. it's all in good fun.

nice thread :]

My heritage is mostly German and Prussian, related to Frederick William the King of Prussia actually.

But it is the German heritage that my ex-wife always said was rather scary. People make joke after joke about Germans and they never seem to get upset about it and laugh right along with you. And then before you know it they have annexed your land and taken over or at least that is what she always said and she had absolutely no German heritage at all...

 

[grydth]

Yep. And all of the French bashing (freedom fries, using words like "frog" and assuming the French are weak) really pisses me off. My first language was French and it was all that my grandparents knew. My grandfather was part of the French resistance in WW2. Martial Artists especially shouldnt engage in ethnic sterotypes. it's really immature and uninformed IMO. Ask a few Savate practitioners if they are weak.

I really, REALLY got angry in school when I was made fun of for being French. It seems to be one of the few remaining acceptable prejudices in the United States. I would sit here and defend the French military but it's pointless. No one wants to talk about how we probably would not have deafeated the Brittish in the Revolution without them. I hear a lot about ww2. It's really REALLY easy to bash France for losing so quickly (in the begining) to the Germans. But does that make every OTHER country that was conqured by the Nazis weak? Please.
America was seperated by the Atlantic from them. (Nazis)
If France is a country that 'gives up" then you must assume then that EVERY country in Europe that was taken over in ww2 is a bunch of quitters.

that is my view on this whole thing (though im not offended by this thread) because I have a sense of humor.. I am just telling you how it is growing up in a French household in the middle of America, especially post 9/11.

By the way..
If anyone wants to say that the French as Individuals are weak or cowardly. They are more than welcome to do more than just Neg rep me without signing it like a coward. If you want to have that level of prejudice (im not saying anyone does) but if you do, Please PM me so we can arrange a set up so you can say it to my face, and then get knocked the ***** out.
I'm so tired of the Anti- French Bs. Don't be a coward and neg rep me. I DIDNT say anything offensive. If you have a problem, take it to me openly.

My 2 cents.

Funny thread though, I enjoyed it.

Respectfully,

Josh

Josh, some advice:

Never use the Internet to in any way appear to challenge somebody to a fight....I'm not talking to you as any kind of moderator, but as a matter of law. You do not want to open this can of worms, which can range from stalkers to federal charges.

French are not the only permissable target in Politikally Korrect Amerika... white males, Germans, Mexicans, Arabs, Conservatives and Christians will do just fine..... got some French Canadian in my family tree also.

If its a hot debate you want, use the facts...... like maybe the French stand at Verdun vs the US public whimpering and wanting to quit now in 2 wars.... or Camerone.........or Cambronne....... for starters.

I've had ***'s neg rep me who didn't have the brains or guts to debate openly --- Hubbard told me to live with it, and you know what? Hubbard's right...... opinions of *** just are not worth getting upset over or in plenty of legal trouble over.

Enjoy and stay cool.

 

[Bob Hubbard]

Anyone want to tangent from French Military tactics to Polish?

Enemy attacks with tanks so you call....
Horse Calvary.



(btw, 1-I'm part polish, my grandfather is 100%, and 2, those horsemen did some real damage to the invading German forces.)

 

[grydth]

There was some speculation about those supposed cavalry charges a few years back..... were they attacks in the traditional sense or were they groups of Polish horsemen trying to break out of the many encirclements who had the misfortune to have an unplanned meeting engagement with a column of early German panzers?

Cavalry was actually used on the Russian Front throughout the war - and by both sides. For but one example of an opposite result, see sources on Russian Cavalry slaughtering thousands of Germans in 1944 at Korsun
Cherkassy...... when the Germans themselves were desperately trying to break out on encirclement.

Personal opinion is that a lot of fighting men in a number of armies - French, Italian, Russian, Romanian have gotten a bad break in popular history. The brave battles have been forgotten, the routs popularized. Plus, what can one expect from troops who are so far behind technologically as to have no effective means of fighting back? Polish troops did run under air attack - but they had no training in or means of fighting back against the Stukas. Germans would run when first faced with the T-34 which literally steamrolled their AT guns.

So, comedy or not, guys before you judge French soldiers or any other ones - first see the situations they were put in. A lot of "history" these days is incomplete, unbalanced and lacking contaxt. No joke.