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What rules do you have for your students when they have to engage in a fight outside the school?
What rules are in place when inside the school during sparring?
Have you ever broken your cardinal rule and if so, why?
We teach all of our students "walk, talk fight". Meaning you try to just walk away first, then try to talk your way out of the situation, then if you can't do either of those, fight without using excessive force. Unlike the local schools, if we have a kid get in a fight who has followed these rules and is only defending himself, he isn't in trouble with us.
Inside the dojang the rule is the senior spars at or just a shade higher than the juniors level. The junior needs to learn from the senior- that can not happen if the senior is going to hard or too soft against the junior.
I broke that cardinal rule once. We had a transfer black belt who was beating up on younger black belts in sparring (we are talking a 22 year old 6 foot 3 guy going against 15 year old black belts). When it was my turn to spar him I took it upon myself to tag him a couple times in the head real good (it was controlled, but I made sure he felt it). When my instructor saw, he asked why I was going so hard. I told him "I am just matching the contact I have been seeing him use". The bully then said "I guess I didn't realize I was going that hard." and I said ok, and took it down a notch. The bully changed his level from then on. Afterwards I got several big smiles from my juniors, but my instructor cornered me and said he knew what I was doing and it was my responsibility as the senior to go at this guy on his level, and that I ruined his opportunity to use my match against this guy as an example for how you ought to spar your juniors. Those smiles from my juniors didn't mean much at that point...![]()
We teach all of our students "walk, talk fight". Meaning you try to just walk away first, then try to talk your way out of the situation, then if you can't do either of those, fight without using excessive force. Unlike the local schools, if we have a kid get in a fight who has followed these rules and is only defending himself, he isn't in trouble with us.
Inside the dojang the rule is the senior spars at or just a shade higher than the juniors level. The junior needs to learn from the senior- that can not happen if the senior is going to hard or too soft against the junior.
I broke that cardinal rule once. We had a transfer black belt who was beating up on younger black belts in sparring (we are talking a 22 year old 6 foot 3 guy going against 15 year old black belts). When it was my turn to spar him I took it upon myself to tag him a couple times in the head real good (it was controlled, but I made sure he felt it). When my instructor saw, he asked why I was going so hard. I told him "I am just matching the contact I have been seeing him use". The bully then said "I guess I didn't realize I was going that hard." and I said ok, and took it down a notch. The bully changed his level from then on. Afterwards I got several big smiles from my juniors, but my instructor cornered me and said he knew what I was doing and it was my responsibility as the senior to go at this guy on his level, and that I ruined his opportunity to use my match against this guy as an example for how you ought to spar your juniors. Those smiles from my juniors didn't mean much at that point...![]()
While I agree with your intentions, I wonder about your interpretation of the other BB's actions as "bullying" - if it only took one encounter for him to realize how hard he was hitting, then it's possible he really didn't realize, and since you describe him as a "transfer BB", he may have been using the level of contact appropriate to his previous school.
I understand why you did what you did - but should a similar situation occur in the future, you might want to talk to the other person first, to make sure you are all using the same rules.