Owning Up To It

Rob Broad

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Have you ever accidnetally tagged some one a little harder then you meant to in class. Has it ever happened to you? I personally believe it the philosphy of admitting it was my fault immediately and apologizing. How many people have that as their way of doing things as well.
 

Kenpo Mama

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You just know the moment that you make contact, you can hear it and feel it, oops, and usually i will immediately apologize. This happens to me with backfists or elbow strikes, you just get that momentum going and bang. Training partners will usually say, "oh that's okay" and we move on from there. In the schools i've been to there hasn't been a lot of retaliation for misdirected or excessive striking, it is after all martial arts.

Donna %-}
 

theletch1

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I think that most of us have, at some point or another, not pulled a punch fast enough, torqued a wrist a little too hard or done any number of things that have caused a little undue pain to our training partner. When that happens I certainly feel that it's proper to give a quick "you alright?" Now, I've done randori where a little extra pain was acceptable so neither undue concern nor apologies were needed.
 
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Rob Broad

Rob Broad

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It is good to see peopel owning their mistakes. I hate it when someone hits you and acts like it was your fault.
 

Mark Lynn

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Yeah I'll admit it. And generally try and move on.

Two times though I got dressed down for to much contact, I bloddied an assistant instructor's lip, and heel kicked an instructor in the mouth (who didn't wear a mouth piece. Both of these happened when I was a brown belt, and they were black belts.

When the black belt dressed me down for heel kicking him in the mouth, a dojo friend told our instructor about it. He told me "Did you knock him out?" "Well no" "Then Mark you controlled it. He didn't wear his mouth piece and he failed to block. Don't worry about it. You could have taken his head off."

Some time later (months or a year or so) we were sparring at my instructor's dojo and my instructor and I were getting after it. We clashed and low and behold my instructor brings his hands up to guard his face from my left heel kick. Well I stop/hesitate and then threw it, he in the mean time drops his guard because I hesitated and he thought we were breaking. The one and only time I hit him without him purposedly letting me (or maybe it was the first time I hit him) I heel kicked him in the face breaking his nose. Beautiful kick, his resposne "Great Kick!" One of the guys was training in the medical field so he ran out to his car and brought back a huge tacklebox looking thing with all of this first aid stuff and they reset the nose right there. We finished out the class continuing with the sparring. It was later that I learned that after class they took him to the emergency room to get it set right and him checked out. He knew I didn't mean to kick him like that when he thought we were breaking, and that I felt terrible that I broke his nose, but he made sure that I knew he wasn't mad at me and that it was an accident.

Quite a difference from the first two incidents.

Mark
 
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8253

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One should always take responsibility for their own actions and apologize when nessissary.
 

Turner

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Is it good training to just stop what you are doing and immediately apologize over and over again or wait for the person to apologize over and over again? It's said "You fight like you train." If in training you make serious contact and immediately start apologizing like crazy, how are you doing to react to being tagged or tagging someone in a real fight.

Safety always comes first. If a person is bloddied or otherwise seriously injured, I don't expect them to continue on in the training session. But if the blow is just a little harder than normal... If real contact is made during a non-contact sparring match... they should keep going. I don't want a student's natural reaction to hitting someone to be to freak out because I'd want them to follow up with another strike on the street.

Wait until after the drill or after the match to apologize. I think everyone should expect to get tagged pretty hard. After all, it is martial arts and not chess.
 

mj-hi-yah

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Of course, it happens! In fact I remember Kenpo Mama making two guys see stars when she did Snakes of Wisdom on them (their heads butted together like Curly and Mo). Remember that Donna? ;) After we all had a laugh, she of course said she was sorry, and no one blamed her! Then I think one of them did it to her and another guy. It's happens...it's karate. I've done my share and taken my share. You know that going in, but it is always polite to say you are sorry. :) After all, it's not the good guys we're looking to hurt!:btg:
 

Kenpo Mama

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mj-hi-yah said:
Of course, it happens! In fact I remember Kenpo Mama making two guys see stars when she did Snakes of Wisdom on them (their heads butted together like Curly and Mo). Remember that Donna? ;) After we all had a laugh, she of course said she was sorry, and no one blamed her! Then I think one of them did it to her and another guy. It's happens...it's karate. I've done my share and taken my share. You know that going in, but it is always polite to say you are sorry. :) After all, it's not the good guys we're looking to hurt!:btg:


Yes, I do remember MJ, and i should say they were lucky i wasn't doing Marriage of the Rams (first strikes to the groins then the head butts) - coulda' got two-fers on that one! And you are correct it is always polite to say you are sorry :wink2: I think we've all given and received on numerous occassions! BTW Congrats on your BB! I heard & read it was awesome! Welcome to the club!

Donna :asian:
 

terryl965

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All the time in the heat of the moment and as Instructors we must alway extend a hand and apologys first and formost. GOD BLESS AMERICA
 

kenpo tiger

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I always apologize. However, it bothers me when a male training partner clocks me accidently and stops and makes a big deal out of it. I will usually say it's my own fault because I didn't block it or wasn't focused. And Kenpo Mama is right. There is no retaliation in our school.

The only one I get angry with is me. KT
 

DoxN4cer

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Rob Broad said:
Have you ever accidnetally tagged some one a little harder then you meant to in class. Has it ever happened to you? I personally believe it the philosphy of admitting it was my fault immediately and apologizing. How many people have that as their way of doing things as well.

It's just the decent thing to do.
 

mj-hi-yah

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Kenpo Mama said:
Yes, I do remember MJ, and i should say they were lucky i wasn't doing Marriage of the Rams (first strikes to the groins then the head butts) - coulda' got two-fers on that one! And you are correct it is always polite to say you are sorry :wink2: I think we've all given and received on numerous occassions! BTW Congrats on your BB! I heard & read it was awesome! Welcome to the club!

Donna :asian:
Ohhhh... LOL on Marriage of the Rams. :btg: Thanks for the congrats! :wink2: This is one membership I hope to keep up! :)

MJ :asian:
 
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RCastillo

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Rob Broad said:
Have you ever accidnetally tagged some one a little harder then you meant to in class. Has it ever happened to you? I personally believe it the philosphy of admitting it was my fault immediately and apologizing. How many people have that as their way of doing things as well.

Only once in my 23 years, that I can remember. I was against my 1st TKD Instructor.

I always stress safety, and once the rules are explained, I'll allow one transgression, after that, you'll sit, or leave.

If another wants to go at it, I will, but I'd rather not, there's no profit in it. Anyone can hit hard, and hurt, or get hurt. :asian:
 
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OC Kid

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back in the day, My best bud Jeff and I would spar after class and during class and literally bang each other out. we would come back to the following class and show each other our bruises. It was a respect thing between us.
 
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Rob Broad

Rob Broad

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I am glad to see so many people still being courteous when training. Too mnay times when visiting schools I have seen people get hit and nothing said or worse someone blaming the other person when they hit someone.
 

Storm

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I used to over apololgise to everyone as I felt so bad. I hated the thought that I had no control over my moves.

I still make mistakes now, but so do others. Im not going to go on and on about it when someone hits me hard as I know they didnt mean to (hopefully!!) and same here. All you need to do is say sorry once and get over it and carry on with your training.

It doesnt actually do you any hard to get that smack in the chops that stuns you occasionally as it makes you aware of how you would or might react with the real thing.

We like to show off our bruises as well..Kinda sick really.
 

don bohrer

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I've hit and been hit harder than should have. I'm always careful but accidents happen and when they do I apologise right away. If I'm blasted a little to hard I don't make a big deal over it. I however will not be someone's punching bag and will ask someone who's not right to get their act together.

Don (El Paso)
 

MichiganTKD

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I have often hit people harder than I should have, a couple of times in places I shouldn't have. Two times I remember:

1. Years ago at a testing, I was free fighting a pregnant woman and contacted her with a back side kick dead on into the abdomen. It wasn't that I hit her particularly hard-I didn't. I think it was the timing. I hit her right when she was coming in and her momentum was forward. She seemed okay, then collapsed like a house of cards moaning in pain. This was in front of everyone. I felt horrible about that.

2. One of my Instructor's Senior Students flew in from Wyoming and brought one of his red belts with him. During free fighting, I hit him with an axe kick to his face hard enough to draw blood. My Instructor told me to take him to the bathroom and talk to him. I figured "What am I supposed to say? Keep your hands up next time?"
 

OULobo

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When I spar, we usually go 30-60%. At this speed we usually just suck it up and keep going, but if it is a really good tag, I usually hold out a glove for agknowledgment. This lets them know I'm not escalating and lets them respond to say it's all good in a quick method that doesn't stop the training flow. That is the situation with all the old hats. We're too old to really want to hurt each other (and I'm only 26). The bad part is when you have new people, people with something to prove or people who haven't mastered their temper. They take a lucky shot as a challenge, they instantly escalate to harder shots and they stop learning. If I tag a newbie good I stop the fight for a few seconds to see if he's cool enough to continue. Sometimes I have to knock the temper out of them. That's the worst case scenario. They either learn from it or they quit after the fight. Either way no matter what I apologize for too hard shots and I give props when I good shots put on me. the key is showing that out of they ring its friends, or at the very least just business/training. Now stick training is different. In sticks I always apologize with a wince and a word.
 
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