MartialArtHeart
Green Belt
Once again, from MA Humor
Add your own, if you wish!
Japanese martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Japanese martial art.
This art is thousands of years old.
~This style is decades old.
The martial arts are about building better people.
~The martial arts are about sweat, bruises and money.
Chinese martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Chinese martial art.
High kicks are stupid.
~I can't do high kicks.
Sparring is extremely important.
~I'm good at fighting and I like it and I can't do much of anything else.
The martial arts are about building better people.
~The martial arts are about beating people up if they lay a finger on you.
Korean martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Korean martial art.
Breaking techniques are very important.
~We do a lot of breaking techniques.
I don't believe in grades.
~Nobody ever gave me a high grade.
The martial arts are about building better evolved characters.
~Like me.
Filipino martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Filipino martial art.
Sophisticated arts like Tai Chi and Aikido are far superior.
~Sparring frightens me.
He's a good martial arts teacher.
~He's in my organization.
He's a lousy martial arts teacher.
~He used to be in my organization but he broke away and I don't get any money out of him anymore.
My style is the best.
~I don't know anything about any other styles.
Grades are not important.
~There's a grading coming up and it's important.
Breaking techniques are useless.
~I can't do breaking techniques.
I'm an innovative, free-thinking, modern Western martial arts teacher, doing my own non-classical thing.
~I'm more interested in teaching than learning; and the Orientals ignore me because they know how ignorant I am.
Martial arts politics are the necessary result of official recognition by respectable associations to protect the public.
~I belong to a large, well-established organization.
I hate martial arts politics.
~None of the large, well-established organizations recognize me or have the slightest interest in my existence.
In this system, we make the art fit the person.
~In this system, we make the person fit the art.
Competitions are a waste of time.
~I never won any competitions.
Forms or kata are the highest expression of the inner essence of the martial arts.
~I read that somewhere -- and I've had enough of tournaments.
Forms or kata are useless.
~Bruce Lee said forms are useless and this relieves me of a lot of effort, so go argue with him.
One style is not better than another -- it's the individual that counts.
~Don't go to another school --it's the style we teach here that counts.
The techniques aren't important.
~The techniques are important.
The principles are important.
~I wouldn't know what else to do with the principles so it's the techniques that are important.
Bruce Lee didn't know what he was talking about.
~I don't know what Bruce Lee was talking about.
Size and strength are not important.
~Size and strength are important, especially if you're fighting somebody
who's bigger and stronger than you are.
Science and leverage will always win out over bruce force.
~Except when he's bigger and stronger than you are.
The purpose of the martial arts is spiritual development and liberation from the ego.
~I'm so humble and wise, it's terrific.
Add your own, if you wish!
Japanese martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Japanese martial art.
This art is thousands of years old.
~This style is decades old.
The martial arts are about building better people.
~The martial arts are about sweat, bruises and money.
Chinese martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Chinese martial art.
High kicks are stupid.
~I can't do high kicks.
Sparring is extremely important.
~I'm good at fighting and I like it and I can't do much of anything else.
The martial arts are about building better people.
~The martial arts are about beating people up if they lay a finger on you.
Korean martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Korean martial art.
Breaking techniques are very important.
~We do a lot of breaking techniques.
I don't believe in grades.
~Nobody ever gave me a high grade.
The martial arts are about building better evolved characters.
~Like me.
Filipino martial arts are the best.
~I practice a Filipino martial art.
Sophisticated arts like Tai Chi and Aikido are far superior.
~Sparring frightens me.
He's a good martial arts teacher.
~He's in my organization.
He's a lousy martial arts teacher.
~He used to be in my organization but he broke away and I don't get any money out of him anymore.
My style is the best.
~I don't know anything about any other styles.
Grades are not important.
~There's a grading coming up and it's important.
Breaking techniques are useless.
~I can't do breaking techniques.
I'm an innovative, free-thinking, modern Western martial arts teacher, doing my own non-classical thing.
~I'm more interested in teaching than learning; and the Orientals ignore me because they know how ignorant I am.
Martial arts politics are the necessary result of official recognition by respectable associations to protect the public.
~I belong to a large, well-established organization.
I hate martial arts politics.
~None of the large, well-established organizations recognize me or have the slightest interest in my existence.
In this system, we make the art fit the person.
~In this system, we make the person fit the art.
Competitions are a waste of time.
~I never won any competitions.
Forms or kata are the highest expression of the inner essence of the martial arts.
~I read that somewhere -- and I've had enough of tournaments.
Forms or kata are useless.
~Bruce Lee said forms are useless and this relieves me of a lot of effort, so go argue with him.
One style is not better than another -- it's the individual that counts.
~Don't go to another school --it's the style we teach here that counts.
The techniques aren't important.
~The techniques are important.
The principles are important.
~I wouldn't know what else to do with the principles so it's the techniques that are important.
Bruce Lee didn't know what he was talking about.
~I don't know what Bruce Lee was talking about.
Size and strength are not important.
~Size and strength are important, especially if you're fighting somebody
who's bigger and stronger than you are.
Science and leverage will always win out over bruce force.
~Except when he's bigger and stronger than you are.
The purpose of the martial arts is spiritual development and liberation from the ego.
~I'm so humble and wise, it's terrific.
