Fear of losing my passion, interest and motivation

Ivan

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I would usually consider myself to be a very passionate individual when it comes to martial arts. My dream is to open a dojo and teach others my own style of fighting. I want to be recognised and known across the internet etc. I don't think a single day has gone by since I set myself this goal, about 2 years ago, in which I haven't dine anything to get closer to it, or at least think about it. Whether it be resistance training, jogs, sessions at the dojang or boxing gym or sometimes all three at once.

However, recently, I have been doubting myself. My doubt lies mainly with the possibility that this "passion" is a fabrication, and that I am lying to myself - that I don't actually put in my all, even though I believe I can. I can't quite put it into words, but I believe this is as close as I can get to it: I am scared immensely by the idea that what I believe to be passion, is just half-halfheartedness.

I am also fearful that I will find something I enjoy much more than martial arts. I think a good example would be that over the pandemic, I have slowly been getting into parkour, and today I realised how much I enjoy it - when I did, it scared me how much training I had been putting into it in comparison to martial arts. It's normal for me to go down and practice the technique for a kick for half an hour, constantly repeating it, before finally getting bored. But today I easily spent 1.5 hours training basic parkour movements, and the difference in my training took me aback. I haven't practised kicks in almost 1.5-2 weeks!

I guess this is probably something too personal to post on a forum, but I don't really have anyone to turn to, considering none of my friends or family are involved in martial arts, and my close family don't have passions. I don't know what has triggered these doubts, and I am hoping that this is just due to me being away from formal training for over 4 months. Has anyone ever experienced this? What did you do? What do I do?
 

Monkey Turned Wolf

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Just about every martial artist I know, including those who run dojos/teach, have periods where their passion ebbs and flows. I think just about anyone, in any field, has periods where there passion ebbs and flows, whether it's a hobby or a professional thing.

I wouldn't worry too much if you're bored for a bit. I also wouldn't be worried if you find a detour (and I also wouldn't be fearful of enjoying something more! If you do, that's awesome!) Particularly with parkour, MA and parkour are two things that can be very easily integrated together.
 

skribs

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I think its happening for a lot of us right now. We can't socialize with our students, or spar, or drill together, or any of that. And its starting to take a toll.
 

Oni_Kadaki

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Passion comes and goes, especially when you go from dabbling as you see fit to training regularly. While I can't speak to whether or not you'll ever be innovative enough to earn fame for creating a style, I'd say it's irrelevant if you're at the two-year mark. For now, passion or otherwise, you just need the discipline to put in a consistent effort. Improvement will come. If you get really bored, change up how you train, go to a seminar, or otherwise mix it up... Just keep training as best as you can.

As for finding something you're more passionate about, I wouldn't worry about that, so long as you have discipline. I would *much* rather be at the shooting range than the dojo, or see a lady friend, or play Dungeons and Dragons... But that's where the discipline comes in. As long as you maintain a training schedule, and dedicate yourself when on Sensei's time, progress will come, regardless of whether or not martial arts is at the top of your current list of priorities, which WILL change, by the way.
 

Gerry Seymour

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I think its happening for a lot of us right now. We can't socialize with our students, or spar, or drill together, or any of that. And its starting to take a toll.
Agreed. We get out of the habit, and lose some of the sense of community during a time like this.
 

Headhunter

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You fear finding something you enjoy more?? Why’s that a bad thing if you find something to enjoy more that’s a good thing.

also just train for the training. Don’t worry about becoming a teacher with your own style who’s famous across the Internet. Because frankly it’s highly unlikely that’ll happen if I’m honest I mean yes you can easily run your own school and maybe make your own style but the chances of becoming famous from it are slim. I mean let’s be real how many really famous martial art teachers are out there...not many and fame is mostly dependent on the style. I mean there’s “famous” guys in kenpo but any judo guy won’t have a clue who they are.

Don’t do it for the fame or any of that just do it to learn and get better and improve your skills whatever happens from that happens
 

jobo

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I would usually consider myself to be a very passionate individual when it comes to martial arts. My dream is to open a dojo and teach others my own style of fighting. I want to be recognised and known across the internet etc. I don't think a single day has gone by since I set myself this goal, about 2 years ago, in which I haven't dine anything to get closer to it, or at least think about it. Whether it be resistance training, jogs, sessions at the dojang or boxing gym or sometimes all three at once.

However, recently, I have been doubting myself. My doubt lies mainly with the possibility that this "passion" is a fabrication, and that I am lying to myself - that I don't actually put in my all, even though I believe I can. I can't quite put it into words, but I believe this is as close as I can get to it: I am scared immensely by the idea that what I believe to be passion, is just half-halfheartedness.

I am also fearful that I will find something I enjoy much more than martial arts. I think a good example would be that over the pandemic, I have slowly been getting into parkour, and today I realised how much I enjoy it - when I did, it scared me how much training I had been putting into it in comparison to martial arts. It's normal for me to go down and practice the technique for a kick for half an hour, constantly repeating it, before finally getting bored. But today I easily spent 1.5 hours training basic parkour movements, and the difference in my training took me aback. I haven't practised kicks in almost 1.5-2 weeks!

I guess this is probably something too personal to post on a forum, but I don't really have anyone to turn to, considering none of my friends or family are involved in martial arts, and my close family don't have passions. I don't know what has triggered these doubts, and I am hoping that this is just due to me being away from formal training for over 4 months. Has anyone ever experienced this? What did you do? What do I do?
lets take a step back

running your own dojo, is a good dream and very achievable, whats not so easy is running your own dojo AND making a reasonable living out of it. that takes business not MA skills


So some where in your plans you need to include academic qualifications and quite possibly getting a business qualification, that then also gives you a plan b, if your dojo dreams isnt feasible then you can run another business/get gainful employment in some one else business. and do your dojo as a sideline hobby

second, you need some balance in your life, thats other hobbies, prefrably hobbies that include making friends/meeting girls


looking back, i essentially wasted my late teenage/early twenties, in a procession of fast motorbikes/cars, building life long friendships chasing women and getting drunk/stoned, but now that was quite the best time of my life and i dont regret a second of it. you only have one youth, use it wisely to do youthful things, live in the moment and enjoy yourself. at least some of the time, reproaching your self for doing something other than MA that you enjoy is just silly


and third any thing sporty that you do, can be considered MA, training gymnastics which is what parkour is, is most certainly building your MA skills, just not the kicking people ones

try monetising your MA training by getting someone to pay you to do physical effort, like land scape gardening for instance, that will improve your fitness and give you the money to buy a fast car and still counts as MA training
 

Tez3

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looking back, i essentially wasted my late teenage/early twenties, in a procession of fast motorbikes/cars, building life long friendships chasing women and getting drunk/stoned, but now that was quite the best time of my life and i dont regret a second of it. you only have one youth,


George Best on his wealth, he said he spent it on booze and women, the rest he wasted. :D
 

skribs

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You fear finding something you enjoy more?? Why’s that a bad thing if you find something to enjoy more that’s a good thing.

also just train for the training. Don’t worry about becoming a teacher with your own style who’s famous across the Internet. Because frankly it’s highly unlikely that’ll happen if I’m honest I mean yes you can easily run your own school and maybe make your own style but the chances of becoming famous from it are slim. I mean let’s be real how many really famous martial art teachers are out there...not many and fame is mostly dependent on the style. I mean there’s “famous” guys in kenpo but any judo guy won’t have a clue who they are.

Don’t do it for the fame or any of that just do it to learn and get better and improve your skills whatever happens from that happens

I would definitely enjoy going back to World of Warcraft. If I do, my life will be nothing but work and WoW. That's how I put on so much weight in my 20s.
 

Gerry Seymour

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I would definitely enjoy going back to World of Warcraft. If I do, my life will be nothing but work and WoW. That's how I put on so much weight in my 20s.
Gaming is definitely a much-loved distraction for me. I could easily get lost in it.
 
OP
Ivan

Ivan

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To put it into perspective, I was playing 60-70 hours per week on average.
That's how much I have been playing over quarantine. I have absolutely nothing else to do. Mostly because all my friends live an hour away from me by train. I live in a relatively large town, but its size is only that because of the sheer amount of housing. So apart from a daily workout at home that usually takes 1.5 hours, and sprints three days a week, all I have is my PC with games and streaming services. I used to practice techniques daily, constantly repeating one techniqeu each day, but I would get bored after 30 minutes and go back to the PC.
 

Buka

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I would usually consider myself to be a very passionate individual when it comes to martial arts. My dream is to open a dojo and teach others my own style of fighting. I want to be recognised and known across the internet etc. I don't think a single day has gone by since I set myself this goal, about 2 years ago, in which I haven't dine anything to get closer to it, or at least think about it. Whether it be resistance training, jogs, sessions at the dojang or boxing gym or sometimes all three at once.

However, recently, I have been doubting myself. My doubt lies mainly with the possibility that this "passion" is a fabrication, and that I am lying to myself - that I don't actually put in my all, even though I believe I can. I can't quite put it into words, but I believe this is as close as I can get to it: I am scared immensely by the idea that what I believe to be passion, is just half-halfheartedness.

I am also fearful that I will find something I enjoy much more than martial arts. I think a good example would be that over the pandemic, I have slowly been getting into parkour, and today I realised how much I enjoy it - when I did, it scared me how much training I had been putting into it in comparison to martial arts. It's normal for me to go down and practice the technique for a kick for half an hour, constantly repeating it, before finally getting bored. But today I easily spent 1.5 hours training basic parkour movements, and the difference in my training took me aback. I haven't practised kicks in almost 1.5-2 weeks!

I guess this is probably something too personal to post on a forum, but I don't really have anyone to turn to, considering none of my friends or family are involved in martial arts, and my close family don't have passions. I don't know what has triggered these doubts, and I am hoping that this is just due to me being away from formal training for over 4 months. Has anyone ever experienced this? What did you do? What do I do?

Warrior.jpg

Paul Coelho.
 

KenpoMaster805

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To have a karate school is not really easy you have do a lot of stuff like were are you gonna rent a studio and how much its caused and the location and what u gonna name the studio and how you gonna advertise it you need also people to paint your studio the way you want you need pamphlet etc and websites to order your martial arts gear and depends what martial arts your teaching

You are right with this pendimic it is taking a toll on us you can do parkour if you like but you can do martial arts on zoom too
 

dvcochran

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I would usually consider myself to be a very passionate individual when it comes to martial arts. My dream is to open a dojo and teach others my own style of fighting. I want to be recognised and known across the internet etc. I don't think a single day has gone by since I set myself this goal, about 2 years ago, in which I haven't dine anything to get closer to it, or at least think about it. Whether it be resistance training, jogs, sessions at the dojang or boxing gym or sometimes all three at once.

However, recently, I have been doubting myself. My doubt lies mainly with the possibility that this "passion" is a fabrication, and that I am lying to myself - that I don't actually put in my all, even though I believe I can. I can't quite put it into words, but I believe this is as close as I can get to it: I am scared immensely by the idea that what I believe to be passion, is just half-halfheartedness.

I am also fearful that I will find something I enjoy much more than martial arts. I think a good example would be that over the pandemic, I have slowly been getting into parkour, and today I realised how much I enjoy it - when I did, it scared me how much training I had been putting into it in comparison to martial arts. It's normal for me to go down and practice the technique for a kick for half an hour, constantly repeating it, before finally getting bored. But today I easily spent 1.5 hours training basic parkour movements, and the difference in my training took me aback. I haven't practised kicks in almost 1.5-2 weeks!

I guess this is probably something too personal to post on a forum, but I don't really have anyone to turn to, considering none of my friends or family are involved in martial arts, and my close family don't have passions. I don't know what has triggered these doubts, and I am hoping that this is just due to me being away from formal training for over 4 months. Has anyone ever experienced this? What did you do? What do I do?
This happens to everyone who invest in a specific activity for a long time. We learn and grow and eventually some of the shine goes away, usually replaced with experience and knowledge. This is a good thing when we stop and reflect on our accomplishments and investments. There is absolutely nothing wrong with having a passion for multiple things. Also very normal for most people with family, work, school, hobbies, etc... So never feel 'guilty' about being interested in another physical activity, especially when they overlap. Another good thing.
You may eventually get to a crossroad with the two but I think you are far from it. Enjoy both activities while you can.
Corny as it sounds, youth is fleeting so get all you can out of it.
 

skribs

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I doubt I’ve ever gotten quite that deep, but I probably could if I didn’t have to work.

It was only that low because of my work schedule. If I didn't have to work, it would easily have been 120 hours a week.
 

Oni_Kadaki

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Been pretty into Grim Dawn and XCOM during quarantine, but I've made myself work out 4-5x and do kata several times weekly to keep some semblance of my conditioning.
 

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