Explanation of life

shesulsa

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On the first day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years, and I'll give you back the other ten." So, God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said, "How boring... I have to do monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" So, God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said, "That is really a tough life you want me to live for sixty years! Let me have twenty, and I'll give you back the other forty." So, God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years." Man said, "What?! Only twenty years?! I tell you what... I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back. Now that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."

So......That is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves. Then, for the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. Don't try to complicate it any more than that.
 

OUMoose

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shesulsa said:
So......That is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves. Then, for the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. Don't try to complicate it any more than that.
Interesting, though I think the order is slightly off. the first 20 is fine, as is the next 40. For the 10 years after that, all we do is bark at the little whipper snappers coming to take our children away (dates and such). then the last bit we're facinated by flinging poo.

:asian:
 

Jade Tigress

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shesulsa said:
On the first day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years." The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years, and I'll give you back the other ten." So, God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span." The monkey said, "How boring... I have to do monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" So, God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said, "That is really a tough life you want me to live for sixty years! Let me have twenty, and I'll give you back the other forty." So, God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years." Man said, "What?! Only twenty years?! I tell you what... I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back. Now that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."

So......That is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves. Then, for the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone. Life has now been explained to you. Don't try to complicate it any more than that.

Sounds about right....:uhyeah:
 

terryl965

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If God created the cow to help man how is the man was created after the cow
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On the third day, God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years." The cow said, "That is really a tough life you want me to live for sixty years! Let me have twenty, and I'll give you back the other forty." So, God agreed again.

See the farmer already exsisted, but I know it was fun reading just thought I would bring up that point, if the point ding was back it would be negative on this comment.
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Terry:asian:
 

mantis

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Sapper6 said:
great explanation. now my life is complete and full of understanding. :)
except that im more than half 'cow'!
 

Ping898

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I love that explanation
 

DavidCC

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terryl965 said:
If God created the cow to help man how is the man was created after the cow
icon5.gif
Terry:asian:
God was planning ahead. It's prety much what He does for a living, isn't it?
 

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