ANOTHER Viagra Joke

[Kirk]

This guy goes to his doctor and says....
My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday,
my ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday
and my wife is coming home Sunday.

I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all."

The doctor says, "You know 3 Viagra pills
3 nights in a row is pretty dangerous for
any man. I will give them to you on the
condition that you return to my office on
Monday so that I can check you out."

The man says, "You have a deal Doc."

Monday morning the man returns with his
arm in a sling.

The doctor says, "What happened"?
The man answered, "Nobody showed

 

[cali_tkdbruin]

HA

 

[jeffkyle]

Keep this up Kirk and you will be the only thread starter on the page. :rofl:

 

[Nightingale]

ROTFLMAO!!!!:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

 

[Seig]

makes one think of both Ben-Gay and Viagra in too short a time span for my taste.

 

[jfarnsworth]

It sounds like that guy had a real personal problem. :rofl:

 

[J-kid]

 

[Nightingale]

Originally posted by Seig
makes one think of both Ben-Gay and Viagra in too short a time span for my taste.

ROTFLMAO.

A friend of mine bout two weeks ago had an unfortunate mishap with bengay... he thought he was grabbing lotion and got the bengay tube instead.

 

[WilliamTLear]

Originally posted by nightingale8472
ROTFLMAO.

A friend of mine bout two weeks ago had an unfortunate mishap with bengay... he thought he was grabbing lotion and got the bengay tube instead.

Ben Gay has an odor that can be sensed a mile a away. If you're implying that that ding dong, put that stuff on his ding dong... Then he got what he deserved. Poor Bastard.

 

[jfarnsworth]

Well if he didn't stop after getting a smell from that crap; then he must have needed some action.:rofl:

 

[Nightingale]

I don't think he was paying attention to smelling it...

he called me, howling, and asking how to get rid of the stuff.

woke me up at 3 am. I told him soap and water was a good thing, hung up, and went back to sleep.

 

[Cliarlaoch]

On a similar vein, another joke on Viagra:

A man goes to his doctor, and complains to him that his wife "just isn't doing it for him" anymore, and asks him if he can get some Viagra to deal with the problem (in other words, the guy got a little bit bored and didn't bother to try and find a better way to deal with it... but I digress).

The doctor responded: "Fine, but I want you to give me an update to make sure that it works properly for you, since it's pretty potent stuff."

The man agreed, and took the pill there in the office in front of the doctor. He then drove home, and sure enough, on the way, he began to get somewhat... er... ornery. About a half-an-hour after the man left the doctor's office, the doctor received a call on his cell from the man.

"Doc, you gotta help me, my wife's not home and I don't know what to do!"

The doctor replied: "Well, do you have a maid?"

"Well, yes."

"So go and sleep with the maid."

There was a brief pause, and then the man meekly responded:
"Doc, I never needed Viagra for the maid..."

Another case of marital success in modern America, folks.

 

[rachel]

:rofl:

 

[Hollywood1340]

News AP-New York
A pharmacy in the south Bronx was held up yesterday. The unidentified robber made of with the entire supply of Viagra as well as an undisclosed amount of cash. When asked by a reporter who would do such a thing, the Police Commisioner replied "A very hardened criminal"




Badum dump ching.......
Waaaah wahh wah waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
Thanky you all, you've been great, no please, please sit down, thank you thank you all....

 

[deadhand31]

Apparently there was a hijacking of a major viagra shipment.


Now the police are looking for hardened criminals.

 

[Seig]

Someone I know asked his doctor about viagra. He was told that it would last up for up to 4 hours. His response, "What! Are you trying to kill me?????By the way, what do I do with the other 3 hours and 59 minutes?"

 

[WilliamTLear]

A woman walks into her doctor's office and tells him that her husband doesn't seem to be able to maintain an erection during sex...

He responds by telling her about a new medical breakthrough called viagra.

She says, "Really, what's that?".

The doctor goes on to explain that viagra is a pill that prolongs a man's performance in bed.

Totally sold on viagra the woman tells her doctor that it sounds great, but her husband would never admit to having a problem, never the less take a pill to fix it.

The doctor responded "Here's a bottle of 50 pills... just drop one in his drink at dinner time every night for the next week, and tell me how things work out next monday.

The woman leaves, and comes back a week later.

She tells her doctor... "My GOD, that was the best sex we've had in the last five years!"

The doctor (filled with pride) says, "Why don't you up the dose to two pills, and see me next week. Let's see how that turns out for you."

The woman agrees and takes off.

A week later she comes back into the office with a huge smile on her face and says, "Doc, I don't know what to say... I've been having the best sex of my life lately, and I owe it all to you!"

The doctor says, "That's great! Keep doing what your doing and I will see you in a month for a refill."

The woman thanks him again and leaves.

Two days later, the doctor is confronted by a familiar looking nine year old boy in his office. With a confounded look on his face he asks what the boy needs.

The boy exclaims, "DOC YOU'VE GOTTA HELP ME! MY MOM DUMPED A BOTTLE OF BLUE PILLS INTO MY DADS COFFE THE OTHER MORNING, AND EVER SINCE HE'S BEEN ACTING CRAZY!"

"Now, now... slow down young man", replied the doctor.

"NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" shouted the boy. "My dads gone nutts! Since the night he drank that coffee he's humped my mom to death, my sister's moved outta the house, my butt hurts, and he's been crawling around on the floor calling here kitty... kitty... kitty..."

 

[Kirk]

Originally posted by WilliamTLear
A woman walks into her doctor's office and tells him that her husband doesn't seem to be able to maintain an erection during sex...

He responds by telling her about a new medical breakthrough called viagra.

She says, "Really, what's that?".

The doctor goes on to explain that viagra is a pill that prolongs a man's performance in bed.

Totally sold on viagra the woman tells her doctor that it sounds great, but her husband would never admit to having a problem, never the less take a pill to fix it.

The doctor responded "Here's a bottle of 50 pills... just drop one in his drink at dinner time every night for the next week, and tell me how things work out next monday.

The woman leaves, and comes back a week later.

She tells her doctor... "My GOD, that was the best sex we've had in the last five years!"

The doctor (filled with pride) says, "Why don't you up the dose to two pills, and see me next week. Let's see how that turns out for you."

The woman agrees and takes off.

A week later she comes back into the office with a huge smile on her face and says, "Doc, I don't know what to say... I've been having the best sex of my life lately, and I owe it all to you!"

The doctor says, "That's great! Keep doing what your doing and I will see you in a month for a refill."

The woman thanks him again and leaves.

Two days later, the doctor is confronted by a familiar looking nine year old boy in his office. With a confounded look on his face he asks what the boy needs.

The boy exclaims, "DOC YOU'VE GOTTA HELP ME! MY MOM DUMPED A BOTTLE OF BLUE PILLS INTO MY DADS COFFE THE OTHER MORNING, AND EVER SINCE HE'S BEEN ACTING CRAZY!"

"Now, now... slow down young man", replied the doctor.

"NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" shouted the boy. "My dads gone nutts! Since the night he drank that coffee he's humped my mom to death, my sister's moved outta the house, my butt hurts, and he's been crawling around on the floor calling here kitty... kitty... kitty..."

Oh man!!!! ROFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[jfarnsworth]

Originally posted by WilliamTLear
"NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!" shouted the boy. "My dads gone nutts! Since the night he drank that coffee he's humped my mom to death, my sister's moved outta the house, my butt hurts, and he's been crawling around on the floor calling here kitty... kitty... kitty..."

That was good.:rofl:

 

[KenpoGirl]

Originally posted by Seig
By the way, what do I do with the other 3 hours and 59 minutes?"

Poor Tess. :wah: