A lack of control indicates you aren't planning your attack, so to speak. There is a fine line between ending the threat and playing in the bloody mess.
Bull pockey.
There's plenty you can do; it's all about control and target selection. You can punch the chest or shoulder rather than the throat; you can slap rather than rip the face off... or you can just stop when the attack stops.
The predators never have, any more than the lion cares about the antelope. Rather than rehash what someone's done better than I can here, I refer you to Rory Miller's book Meditations on Violence.
I don't assume that there'll be a witness who can help you or provide context. As a cop, I can't tell you how often I've heard one variant or another of "I saw what happened..." to be followed by "I heard... and then I looked over." So they didn't really see...
In law enforcement, we learn to act until the threat is stopped. Only then do you stop, whether it's shooting or using a baton or going hands on. As civilized beings, you have to be able to flip the switch to "ON" to deal with the attack, and then back to "OFF" when the threat stops.
However, you said yourself, in your reply to just2kicku, that you may find yourself under arrest. May/may not happen, but unless you do nothing, then you face that risk.
There may be nothing you can do to prevent the arrest. Be ready to give a relatively clear, but short explanation, to the cops when they arrive. Or lawyer up right away... and say nothing. You can get advice ranging from "tell it all" to "say nothing!" and all of it's good advice, but each choice will shape what happens. Discuss it with a lawyer, 'cause what I'd do calls on my background and professional connections.Agreed, and I said that very thing in my OP.
Mugging and carjackings are "real violence." The Monkey Dance is a status fight; each culture has it's own rules for how it develops and when it stops. And some predatory attacks do have a posturing element (brandishing a gun or knife in a robbery for example, rather than simply shooting/stabbing...) but you have to always assume that it's for real. A Monkey Dance will only occur between two people who at least believe they have relatively equal status, so have equal amounts to gain or lose. Otherwise, they look like idiots. If there's nothing to lose or gain, the Monkey Dance won't happen. You don't see a Rotty yipping and barking at everything that moves (as a general rule) they way you do a litlle ankle biter like a Pomeranian.
I hope I didn't give you the impression that I was saying that after the threat was over, that I'd continue. Likewise I never said that I'd KO someone for calling me an *******. But, I also do not feel that we, as people, should be victims. As I've said, I keep to myself, dont frequent bad areas or problem locations. I'll refer back to my usual story, of when I was walking my dog thru my condo complex, made eye contact with someone in a passing car, I kept walking, the car stopped, and the passenger got out, yelling back at me, asking if, in his exact words, "Do you have a ****ing problem?" to which I stopped, turned around, looked around to confirm he was talking to me, and simply said, "Nope, no problem." Now, because I didn't bow down and kiss this guys ***, begging him for forgiveness, but instead stood there, not giving in, not giving him the reaction he was hoping for, somehow, my actions are frowned upon. Go figure. Personally, that guy could go **** himself, and here's why:
1) I did nothing wrong.
2) I made eye contact because I honestly thought I knew him or he knew me, but we didn't recognize each other.
3) He was clearly trying to intimidate me, but again, I wasn't giving in.
4) He backed off, and went about his business, because a) he didnt want to risk getting bit by the dog, b) he really was, deep down, a chicken **** *****, or c) realized I wasn't going to cower and his tough guy talk.
Again, I said nothing offensive or aggressive towards him, made no aggressive move towards him. I just stood there, and had every right to do so. Only if he came at me, would I have done something. But again, I'm the bad guy, because I didn't bow down to him. I stood my ground, and made him know that I was confident in my actions.
As tempting as it may be, to get in one last shot, while the guy is down, I'm not that stupid.
I'll always try to talk first, but as we all know, thats not always going to work. Interestingly enough, I was talking with one of my Arnis insts. last week. He's a Capt. in the Dept. of Corrections, with a little over 20yrs in. We were discussing use of force, and some incidents regarding excessive force on the part of some of the COs. The stats still say that most people are not direct victims of real violence. Doesn't mean it won't happen to you or any other particular person at any time. And, of course, choices you or our hypothetical person make can increase the odds that they'll be a victim. If you go into Anacostia in DC, for example... It's far more likely that we'll encounter some sort of Monkey Dance that may escalate to violence.
