Laser eye beams. A thought exercise.

Discussion in 'General Martial Arts Talk' started by drop bear, Mar 17, 2020.

  1. drop bear

    drop bear Sr. Grandmaster

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    Ok. Maybe this will be simpler way to describe how reality cannot compete with fantasy.

    I have mastered laser eye beams. And they are increadably effective. But they take 10 years to master and I can't show you because they would kill you.

    Unfortunately they also shoot out an EMP so trying to film them is impossible. The only way to learn this technique would be to train with me for ten years at which point you would be an unstoppable fighter.

    There are only three people in this world who know this technique and the other two are so humble as to never come forward with this. I cannot divulge who taught me. But as I am one of the three people in the world who has mastered this I am the foremost expert on the subject.

    Now because there is no way to disprove my claim obviously you have to accept it as true.

    So how do you discern whether I am being honest or just lying to you?
     
  2. Danny T

    Danny T Senior Master

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    Please provide any tangible proof you are unstoppable yourself. Here is a piece of leather please demonstrate any laser abilities you have.
     
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  3. gpseymour

    gpseymour MT Moderator Staff Member

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    That's all well and good. When given an extreme of extremes, it's pretty clear. The problem is you don't recognize any nuance - it's all binary to you (a recurring issue with many of your arguments, over time). Life rarely works that way. So, there's a huge area between "I can show you evidence that nobody can refute" and "evidence is impossible because it's so secretly, magically, secret". That's where your attempted logic fails you.
     
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  4. Gweilo

    Gweilo 2nd Black Belt

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    @gpseymour I would have given you 5 ticks for that quote if I could, where I come from the quote would be "bob on".
     
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  5. Buka

    Buka Grandmaster

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    Laser eye beams. I gotta’ get me some of those!
     
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  6. oftheherd1

    oftheherd1 Senior Master

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    Careful you guys. Don't put DB down too quickly. I am pretty certain I saw him at the last Dim Mak symposium. They had a seminar on Laser Eyes, but only one person I saw signed up for the course. It seemed it was too expensive both in money and study time for anyone but that one person I saw to sign up for it. That one person must have been DB, even though I don't know him by sight to be sure. But until it can be confirmed or denied, I would suggest caution. :)
     
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  7. geezer

    geezer Grandmaster

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    Drop Bear -of course you can demonstrate it, but only to paying students who have followed you loyally for many years, completed the ritual of becoming a disciple, and have concluded their decades long training in eye-shielding so they can observe your skills without being blinded.

    I'm certain you have several such devoted disciples who will attest to having witnessed and experienced your mastery of the lazer eye! Too bad it would be unsafe and unethical to let more people see your skills, but I understand that your incredible moral integrity prevents you from putting others at risk.

    Clearly, such skills could only be used in the most desperate of self-defence situations. And even then, I'm sure an exalted master like yourself would rather submit to a beating, and perhaps even risk his very life rather than use such a terrible ability to harm another. Bless you, Master!
     
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  8. skribs

    skribs Senior Master

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    What you've done is you've divided martial arts into two categories, and picked which techniques or training methods go where. It's made it very easy for you to lump everything you don't like under one group, and whenever someone talks about a technique from that box, you point at another technique in that box and say "look, they're both the same."

    If I were to do the same thing with cats, I would tell you that tigers are no more dangerous than a house cat, because they're both felines. Therefore, should you see a tiger in the wild, you should go and pet it. It's a horrible use of logic. You might not like the techniques you hear described, and you may not agree with the evidence you receive (if any). But that doesn't excuse these logical fallacies you bring to nearly every argument you get into.

    With that said, there are a couple of things I would look for in trying to determine if someone is legit or not:
    1. How do they advertise the success of the technique?
    2. How do they advertise learning the technique?
    3. How do other people who are experienced in the art respond in the conversation?
    If the technique is advertised as a high-percentage solution for any situation with no drawbacks or counters, then it's probably suspect. But if a technique is advertised as effective given the right situation, that's a different story.

    If the technique is a secret that you can't learn until you're a black belt, it's probably a scam to keep you in class until you get your black belt. So that's less of a concern online, when you're not in my school and I'm not trying to bring you to my school. (The other side is also suspect, if the technique is so easy to learn you can learn it in 5 minutes by watching a video). However, some techniques are a higher degree of difficulty to use effectively. There's a difference between "I can't teach you until you are an Nth Degree Black Belt" and "you have to train for several years to understand the nuances and be able to apply it."

    And last is what other people say. Now in this thread you do have some people who are agreeing with you, but it's quite clear they're trolling. And knowing you, it's quite clear you're trolling too. But if you have several people from different disciplines discussing a technique, chances are there's something to it. A lot of the techniques you've had trouble understanding lately have been discussed by people who train Hapkido, Karate, Aikido, Taekwondo, and Kung Fu. Different arts, different classes. I don't know them and they don't know me, and we have no reason to make it sound like the other knows what they're talking about.

    A five-year-old will believe everything anyone tells him. A teenager will refute everything anyone tells him. Try not to be either of those things.
     
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  9. dvcochran

    dvcochran Senior Master

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    That's great. Just great.
     
  10. drop bear

    drop bear Sr. Grandmaster

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    Not at all. I recognize that some martial artists may make false claims. The difference is my personal integrity makes this claim true.

    That is recognizing the nuances of this discussion.
     
  11. drop bear

    drop bear Sr. Grandmaster

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    Certainly. Post me that piece of leather and I will post it back to you with laser eye holes in it.

    That should be all the evidence anyone needs anyway. Unless they were being deliberately obtuse.
     
  12. gpseymour

    gpseymour MT Moderator Staff Member

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    This is rich, coming from someone who routinely makes false claims about others and says (essentially), "Prove me wrong, or I'm right."

    You stack up logical fallacies, wrap them in biased thinking, and work hard to make it sound logical.
     
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  13. skribs

    skribs Senior Master

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    Your discussions have nuance?
     
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  14. Danny T

    Danny T Senior Master

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    No, you asked how do I discern your honesty therefore you are obviously want me to discern it.
    Therefore you need to send me your physical address. I'll happily come to you with my leather and view your lasering of the leather (with the proper safety equipment of course) unless you actually don't want me to believe you or to learn from you which is fine as well.
     
  15. dvcochran

    dvcochran Senior Master

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    Ok Bear answer me this; is there Anyone currently practicing a martial art that is Not getting taken?
     
  16. oftheherd1

    oftheherd1 Senior Master

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    Don't worry DB. You don't need to waste your time to answer; I've got your back on this one. Obviously only your martial art and the Hapkido I studied have any value to their students; mine being best of course.

    I have never studied your martial art but I take your word for it based on your demonstrated honesty and use of logic. But of course, that lack of study of your art , gives me the opening I need to say that mine is nonetheless superior.

    Keep it up. You and I know truth supported by logic. :)
     
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  17. Martial D

    Martial D Senior Master

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    Pretty much all of you missed his point. This honestly reads like you are all his salty ex girlfriends.

    I get that if you devote a lot of time to something you believe in, it sucks to have it called out.

    But when the results for something just aren't there...anywhere..it should be called out.

    As a small Jewish man once said....

    Facts don't care about feelings.
     
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  18. skribs

    skribs Senior Master

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    This is because he makes a lot of these kinds of posts when he's losing an argument in another thread. He takes the rant to a new thread where he can start and control the narrative. That's why what counts as evidence changes depending on what narrative he's making that day.

    It also doesn't help that his standards are a little bit insane. UFC is all that matters, real world data doesn't. (Except in threads where it supports his argument). Even then, sometimes he's off. I've seen him post data, and then I've seen him make arguments that contradict that data in another thread. His data shows that arm bars are the third most popular submission in UFC, but then in another thread he says that to beat an armbar you just have to "not be crap".

    He comes in, acts like the arbiter of martial arts, that only he knows what works and what doesn't. And if there's a technique he doesn't understand, he tries to bury you in paperwork to prove to him that you can do it. And of course he would only be satisfied if I were to use that technique to become a UFC champion. Because he wouldn't be able to verify it's true effectiveness unless it's against a UFC champion.

    It doesn't seem that he calls people out based on facts. He calls people out based on his narrow-minded opinions and impossible standards.
     
  19. Martial D

    Martial D Senior Master

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    I believe you are adding a lot of inference because you don't like what he has to say. I read all the same threads and I have seen literally 0 of those things.

    Like, in your example, you failed to mention those are two different kinds of arm bars being discussed. On the ground it's a high percentage move that requires knowing some ground defense to avoid
    Where as a standing arm bar pretty much only works on a cooperating partner.
     
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  20. Headhunter

    Headhunter Senior Master

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    Yawn123
     

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