Anger Issues

[Buka]

This is a great thread, in my opinion, and last night I was considering starting a new thread asking why people come to MT and why they post but I'll just piggy-back off of this thread (but maybe I should start a new thread as I am actually going "off topic" within this thread myself--although I do think it is related as I believe it is mostly angst that leads to the following problems around here).

What I do not understand here on MT is why all the silly, childish bickering back and forth about completely off topic or very tangential topics under a person's post.

As a relatively new person on the site I just shake my head when I see a new person post an honest question and they get a few good intentioned comments from people and then the people that are replying to the OP's question start to rip apart the other people's responses. BUT it does not end there as they continue to bicker, back and forth, for pages and it becomes incredibly non-productive and personal.

As a new person, it just turns me off to the site and I imagine that it causes a lot of new people to just walk away.

Not sure how to stop this (or even if you want to stop it) but as an outsider coming onto the site, it is not very pleasant.

Perhaps lock the threads after two pages b/.c it seems that everything just unravels starting on the third page.

Hadn't noticed the third page thing, but there's a lot of things I don't pick up on. I'll have to watch for that, kind of interesting.

 

[Xue Sheng]

Yosemite Sam?

part of it

 

[Xue Sheng]

Just so you know, I'm pretty much convinced that none of you all actually exist. You're all just figments of my imagination.

But of course....and I blame YOU for not imagining me with a LOT more money and a Bugatti Veyron

 

[pgsmith]

Just so you know, I'm pretty much convinced that none of you all actually exist. You're all just figments of my imagination.

If I were simply a figment, I would have much more hair.

 

[Tez3]

If I were simply a figment, I would have much more hair.

I'd have bigger boobs......

 

[Jenna]

I sometimes detect what I consider anger issues among posters. People who are anger easily have what some psychologists call a low tolerance for frustration, they feel that they should not have to be subjected to frustration, inconvenience, or annoyance. Yeah, well, welcome to the real world. But what this has to do with Martial training, especially fighting, can sometimes be important.

Anger in your life can bleed into your fighting. Some may think that's a good thing, but it's not, at least within the higher echelons of fighting. Anger clouds your judgement, disrupts your breathing and endurance, screws up your timing and sometimes, believe it or not, messes with your spacial distance (the same way fear and adrenal dumps do)

Personally, I always used to love going against fighters who I knew had anger issues. Always made my job easier. Most Martial Arts I've had experience with helps with these issues. And every good fighting gym I've ever been to, does as well.

Chillin' is good thing. Helps with your your health, your relationships, your occupations...and your fighting.

People are allowed to be angry tho yes? I mean if they want to be hostile it is ok.. maybe it is not beneficial to them, or even to us, and but it is ok right? even if we prefer they were not, still it is ok that they are, you agree with this?? is a question thank you

 

[Buka]

People have the right to be a lot of things, no argument there, Jenna. But anger isn't good for you. Or those around you. What I find so strange, I believe if all the people that post here were out together, or in a training environment together, everyone would likely get along just fine. And if they didn't, I think a lot of us here who've run all kinds of Martial gyms, would deal with that issue the same we we always have. (with hugs and bunny rabbits)

Professionally, I deal with angry people on a regular basis, nearly everyday. It can be a pain in the A, but a good thing is it keeps me calm. It's like seeing someone with an arrow through their head and thinking, "Sure glad that ain't me".

 

[Xue Sheng]

People have the right to be a lot of things, no argument there, Jenna. But anger isn't good for you. Or those around you. What I find so strange, I believe if all the people that post here were out together, or in a training environment together, everyone would likely get along just fine. And if they didn't, I think a lot of us here who've run all kinds of Martial gyms, would deal with that issue the same we we always have. (with hugs and bunny rabbits)

Professionally, I deal with angry people on a regular basis, nearly everyday. It can be a pain in the A, but a good thing is it keeps me calm. It's like seeing someone with an arrow through their head and thinking, "Sure glad that ain't me".

Agree mostly, but psychologically speaking anger can be healthy and suppression of anger is real REAL unhealthy. It is how you deal with anger that make the difference.

Now with that said...WHO ASKED YA HAWAIN GUY!!!!!!

 

[Steve]

there are times when it is actually very helpful and even essential to let someone see you are angry. I wouldn't say that it's helpful or positive to lose control. But I disagree with the blanket statement that anger isn't good.

 

[Buka]

Oh, I agree, suppressing anger is really bad for you. Really bad. It's more of a how and where thing. And it's more about not suppressing emotions, rather than just anger.

Now....who the F wants to fight? Pussy Mother Fracker sons O beech Aholes!
And as an old guy in the neighborhood used to say after every rant he went on "Three time I gonna' say that!"

 

[Tez3]

Professionally, I deal with angry people on a regular basis, nearly everyday. It can be a pain in the A, but a good thing is it keeps me calm.

I was always calm and extra polite to angry people, not only does that put you in the right if there's any complaints, it really, really annoys the angry person!

 

[Xue Sheng]

Oh, I agree, suppressing anger is really bad for you. Really bad. It's more of a how and where thing. And it's more about not suppressing emotions, rather than just anger.

Now....who the F wants to fight? Pussy Mother Fracker sons O beech Aholes!
And as an old guy in the neighborhood used to say after every rant he went on "Three time I gonna' say that!"

Why you... I otta... don't make ME come over there.

 

[Buka]

Why you... I otta... don't make ME come over there.

I dare ya! And excuse the breach of etiquette by going to the - I TRIPLE DOG DARE YA!
And I'll make you come up to my mountain - and you'll hate it! Harumph, harumph....fix your wagon, X Man.

 

[Steve]

I see some things in this thread that are a little concerning. I see some folks who seem to be proud that they can and have manipulated others. We talk about trolling around here. The internet term of trolling that we don't appreciate on this forum is (or should be) just as unappreciated in real life. But several people seem to be proud that they troll others in real life, causing them to get angry, or making them angrier.

I think the intent of the thread is interesting, which is that getting angry is seldom (although not always) unconstructive. I also think people should be less cavalier about how well they manipulate others and make them angry. It's petty and childish, and very mean.

 

[Buka]

I see some things in this thread that are a little concerning. I see some folks who seem to be proud that they can and have manipulated others. We talk about trolling around here. The internet term of trolling that we don't appreciate on this forum is (or should be) just as unappreciated in real life. But several people seem to be proud that they troll others in real life, causing them to get angry, or making them angrier.

I think the intent of the thread is interesting, which is that getting angry is seldom (although not always) unconstructive. I also think people should be less cavalier about how well they manipulate others and make them angry. It's petty and childish, and very mean.

I agree. One of the things I'm proud of is dealing with angry people, calming them down, defusing situations before they go somewhere. At work, amongst friends, family, acquaintances. And I know several folks who are really good at this as well.

On the net.....that might be another kettle of fish. Might be different if we were all skyped up as we posted.
Wouldn't that be interesting.....nah....then I'd have to put on pants.

 

[Tez3]

I was always calm and extra polite to angry people, not only does that put you in the right if there's any complaints, it really, really annoys the angry person!

Sigh, I have you on ignore Steve but it seems I still have to see your 'dislike', I can't think why you would dislike it but for your information when you work in the public eye, have CCTV watching as well as the people you may have to arrest you'd better be polite and calm because things are going to go very badly for you if you don't. It's part of the training to stay calm, to be the one in control and most police officers I know, even if they are bricking it, can 'fake' that calm exterior needed to do a successful job.
As for being angry, I can only assume you are still angry at me for whatever you think I did. Please tell me what it was............ so I can do it again. Actually I'm joking, I still don't read your posts.

 

[CB Jones]

Just so you know, I'm pretty much convinced that none of you all actually exist. You're all just figments of my imagination.

Maybe we are actually all different personalities in your head.....or maybe you don't exist and you are just another personality among us.......

 

[Brian R. VanCise]

I'm a ginger, soooo..... But in the real world I am genwrally considered to be laid back and very positive.

In general, it takes a very long time to get on my list. Once you're there, though, you're pretty much there for good.

Very common among our people Steve!

 

[Bill Mattocks]

Speaking for myself, joking aside, I know that I can lose my temper, online and in person. Snide jibes and verbal sparring have been my stock in trade for a long time; I'm really trying to tone that down and just not be a butthead quite as much.

I have taken two semi-long self-imposed sabbaticals from MT in the past. Both were due to the same individual who really knew how to get under my skin in a way that most people can't; I have a pretty thick hide generally. I left because I didn't want to be the person who got into it with that jackhole and made life on MT miserable for everyone.

I'm having a much better time now because of the ignore feature. Yep, if I never click like on any of your responses to me, it's probably because I'm ignoring you. And brother (or sister), you earned it. Sometimes I actually do look to see what was said when there are 'ignored content' messages, but since they are 'ignored', I find I can just let them go by, no matter what obnoxious thing was said.

Maybe some of you have me on ignore (and therefore won't be reading this). I want you to know it's perfectly OK with me and I totally get it. I can be a handful. But I am trying to get better. Maybe if someone would give me a nudge from time to time if I say something not-so-nice, and I'd be more aware of it and better able to fix that flaw in my personality.

 

[CB Jones]

I'm a ginger, soooo.....

For full disclosure: I'm part Ginger