really Bad 1st Date

shudokan-RN

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I am glad I am Married......

In the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went out into the audience to
find the most embarrassing first date that a woman had ever had. The
winner described her worst date experience. There was absolutely no
question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was mid-winter....snowing and quite cold..and the guy had
taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was
a day trip (no overnight) They were strangers, after all, and truly had
never met before.

The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed
home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain,
when she gradually began to realize that she should have not had that
extra latte.

They were about an hour away from anywhere with a restroom and in the
middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested that she try to hold it,
which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of heavy snow and
slow going, there came a point where she told himthat he had better
stop and let her pee beside the road or it would be in the front seat
of his car.

They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her
pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing,
so she let her butt restagainst the rear fender to steady herself. Her
companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and indeed
was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could think
about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of
thesituation.

Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation. As
she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks
were firmly glued to the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues frozen to
pump handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to disengage her
flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand
new problem due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she
answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a
reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some
assistance!" He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with
her sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst
out laughing. She too got the giggles and when they finally managed to
compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma.

Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they were faced with a
real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her
chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first
place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her
free. So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to
unzip is pants and pee her butt off the fender.

As the audience screamed with laughter, she took the Tonight Show
prize hands down....or perhaps it should be "pants down".
............And you thought your first date was embarrassing.

Jay Leno's comment. "This gives a whole new meaning to being pissed
off".
 

exile

To him unconquered.
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Ummm... I hate to ask such an obvious question but... was there a second date?? :lol:
 

MA-Caver

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Usually in my vehicle I carry some lightweight survival gear. This includes a small stove in which to heat liquids. With the snow I'd have a good 8-10 ounces of warm water in which to thaw her off. I'd gone that route instead of pissing her off.
She's lucky that she was able to keep her footing, had she slipped it would've given new meaning to "tear her ***." That would've hurt.
 

tellner

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A second date? Probably. I mean, they already...

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(wait for it)
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... broke the ice.
 

exile

To him unconquered.
Lifetime Supporting Member
MTS Alumni
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A second date? Probably. I mean, they already...

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
(wait for it)
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

... broke the ice.

Tellner... you didn't really say that, did you??

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


.... I guess you did, at that! :roflmao:
 

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