Introducing women to Martial Arts

Status
Not open for further replies.

Gerry Seymour

MT Moderator
Staff member
Supporting Member
Joined
Mar 27, 2012
Messages
29,970
Reaction score
10,524
Location
Hendersonville, NC
It's not for you to decide or assume that the fuel isn't there. I am asking for suggestions on how one might go about introducing the idea. I am not forcing anyone, and if she decides it's not for her, I would leave it at that. You are quite literally saying that I shouldn't bother trying.

"You can try and get them interested, and if they are, they'll start"
That's really great advice! Any suggestions or tips on how to go about doing that?
To introduce someone to the idea (and their gender has no influence on this I can think of), just bring up the idea. Something like: "You ever thought about training in martial arts?" Or something about a competition you're going to see, or a MA movie that you like.

But that's just introducing the idea. I doubt she lives in a world where the idea of MA hasn't popped up from time to time.
 

Gerry Seymour

MT Moderator
Staff member
Supporting Member
Joined
Mar 27, 2012
Messages
29,970
Reaction score
10,524
Location
Hendersonville, NC
Your comments are much more reasonable than Skrib's, but at the same time, a person can't decide if they want to visit Venice or not unless they learn or know something about it.

When it comes to martial arts, I feel that, generally speaking, the public's general ideas are often wrong, or misinformed. They may see it as something violent, uninteresting, or unfeminine, without even trying it and realizing they might love it. If they gave an honest try after piquing their curiosity and decided it wasn't for them, I wouldn't push the topic further than that.
And what if they aren't curious?
 
OP
N

Nobufusa

Green Belt
Joined
Oct 31, 2020
Messages
104
Reaction score
6
If you feel the thread has gone creepy, especially since you've got all the useful answers you're likely to get, it's perfectly fine to just ignore the thread and stop commenting.
Does that go for anyone else who continues to comment? Who continue to shamelessly lie and assume my intentions?
 
OP
N

Nobufusa

Green Belt
Joined
Oct 31, 2020
Messages
104
Reaction score
6
In his analogy, it pretty much is.
Except... it's not. You can have potential, without knowing you have potential in something.

And what if they aren't curious?
Well, we won't know until I have that conversation with them.



"Something you posted gave me the idea it wasn't about fighting ability, so what is it about MA that makes it a particularly good choice for her?"

Well, I clearly stated what aspects of martial arts MIGHT appeal to her, so you read one part of the post, but not the other which answers your question.

"To be clear about my point, you haven't said at all why you think this particular person should be interested in or get particular benefit from MA."
Well, firstly, this question is frankly, irrelevant to my post, and secondly, with all due respect, not your business. But to answer it anyways, I think most people can benefit from training in martial arts. There are hundreds of martial arts promotional videos on YouTube, extolling the benefits of martial arts, and why people should do them, are you commenting under every single one of them asking the uploader why he or she is posting videos about the benefits of martial arts? People share their hobbies with others, it's what humans do. Your interrogation like questioning (from almost everyone in this forum who has answered so far) is frankly bizarre and wildly inappropriate (not to mention the double standard of you not commenting on other people's highly contentious remarks)

"If she says something like, "I wish I could....." and you think MA training would help with whatever that was ("get in shape", "meet new friends", or whatever), then you could suggest it. If you're just suggesting it because you think she should like it, why?"

Why are you assuming what I think? That's the real question.
 
OP
N

Nobufusa

Green Belt
Joined
Oct 31, 2020
Messages
104
Reaction score
6
Those people weren't spontaneously interested. Perhaps they saw a class, or had a little curiosity from having watched MA movies. Or they just liked how much fun it sounded like when a friend talked about the class they'd just been to.
Sure, totally, everyone has a different story about how they got involved.
 
OP
N

Nobufusa

Green Belt
Joined
Oct 31, 2020
Messages
104
Reaction score
6
From post #30 in this thread:
"When it comes to martial arts, I feel that, generally speaking, the public's general ideas are often wrong, or misinformed. They may see it as something violent, uninteresting, or unfeminine, without even trying it and realizing they might love it."

I'm not putting words in your mouth. You're putting words in your own mouth. I'm not lying about them. You're lying about not saying them. This is gaslighting at its finest. One reason you seem like a creep.

Hi, if you read exactly what I said very carefully, I said " generally speaking, public's general ideas are often wrong, or misinformed"

NOT "girls don't know anything about martial arts"
which is what you said what I said, so not only are you gaslighting me, but you are also projecting your own creepiness at me.

YOU are doing the gaslighting. And I am clueless as to why the administrators are tolerating your abusive behavior.

I'm willing to bet that everyone in your life has things they've done that you haven't been told about. Assuming she doesn't have the knowledge because she hasn't told you is a very narcissistic way of looking at the world.
Yes, I am assuming that not doing something means you have no knowledge of doing that thing. Very elementary, not narcissistic at all.


Maybe, maybe not. But they may have opinions about it that are good or bad. And it makes sense to find them out before figuring out a gameplan to convince them.

See above. You said it. It's in writing. You can't gaslight your way out of this one.

No. Telling this girl "I think you should do martial arts, even though you're a girl, and I know you don't know anything about martial arts so here's a book" is mansplaining.

There you go gaslighting me again, I didn't say she knows nothing about Martial Arts because she's a girl, I said she LIKELY doesn't know anything about martial arts, because as far as I know, she's NEVER done them! Her gender is not relevant to her knowledge or lack thereof of martial arts.
You are trolling me, and your comments are libelous. MODS
mansplaining? How is it mansplaining to give her a book that would probably be written by women for women? Maybe you should stop commenting since you clearly have absolutely nothing of value to contribute or offer?


You accuse me of twisting your words, but yet you twist mine.

You've essentially decided you know what this girl knows and doesn't know better than she does. You've decided you know what's best for her without even knowing her opinions on the subject. You've decided that it's your job to improve her life, when you don't even know her well enough to know if she likes or dislikes the subject you're talking about. You refuse to just ask her about it, and instead are looking for some sort of manipulative way to do so. And then you gaslight us. There isn't a single thing about this thread that isn't creepy.

"You refuse to just ask her about it" there you go lying about me AGAIN, and assuming what I am or am not going to do. Did I say that I wasn't going to ask her about it? You're right, the thread is very creepy, and it's creepy because OF YOU AND YOUR GASLIGHTING AND LIBELOUS ASSUMPTIONS.
"Looking for some manipulative way to do so" Gifting someone a book they might like is manipulative, gotcha.




Then why did you refuse the suggestion of "Hey, what do you think of martial arts?" If your decision is to suggest it to her, then why not start with suggesting it to her?
I didn't refuse the suggestion. There you go gaslighting me AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN.

The fact that you instead need a scheme to convince her that you know what's best for her, yes, that's creepy. Honestly at this point I'm a little bit scared for her safety.

"asking for book suggestions" = scheming. More gaslighting and lying.

"convince her you know what's best for her"= making a suggestion to her. Mods, this has really gone too far, this man's comments are libelous and gaslighting.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Latest Discussions

Top