hell explained by a chemisty student

[ppko]

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington
chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it
with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the
pleasure of enjoying it as well:



Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs
heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas
cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.



One student, however, wrote the following:



First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need
to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which
they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul
gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many
souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can
project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are,
we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states
that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same,
the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter
Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all
Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take
into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be
true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen
over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it
follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore,
extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine
being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+!

 

[grydth]

Doesn't matter - He's going to Hell.:angel:

 

[aplonis]

And besides, since it is an established fact that heat rises....

 

[Sukerkin]

ROFL. Altho' the fellow may be no gentleman (kissing-and-telling is so passe) you can't fault his logic .

 

[terryl965]

Lmao

 

[Bumblebee]

And besides, since it is an established fact that heat rises....

Ha, that's a good one. You're funny. You are kidding, right?

 

[JBrainard]

I thought that the last paragraph was a bit juvenile, but other than that, it was pretty funny.

 

[Brian R. VanCise]

Juvenile but funny! :rofl:

 

[theletch1]

I thought that the last paragraph was a bit juvenile, but other than that, it was pretty funny.

For those of us that get that deer in the headlights look when someone starts spouting Boyle's law it was the last paragraph that made the joke.

 

[qi-tah]

I am guessing that once Theresa found out about this, all hell did in fact, break loose! Ah, alas for the pretty theory... :rofl:

 

[ppko]

Boyle's law

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


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Boyle's law (sometimes referred to as the Boyle-Mariotte law) is one of the gas laws and basis of derivation for the Ideal gas law, which describes relationship between the product pressure and volume within a closed system as constant when temperature remains at a fixed measure; both entities remain inversely proportional.[1][2] The law was named for chemist and physicist, Robert Boyle who published the original law in 1662. The law itself can be defined succinctly as:
“For a fixed amount of gas kept at a fixed temperature, P and V are inversely proportional.[2]”Contents

[hide]

• <LI class=toclevel-1>1 History <LI class=toclevel-1>2 Definition
  • <LI class=toclevel-2>2.1 Relation to kinetic theory and ideal gases
  • 2.2 Equation
• 3 See also

//
[edit] History

Main article: History of thermodynamics
Boyle's Law is named after the Irish natural philosopher Robert Boyle (Lismore, County Waterford, 1627-1691) who was the first to publish it in 1662. The relationship between pressure and volume was brought to the attention of Boyle by two friends and amateur scientists, Richard Towneley and Henry Power, who discovered it. Boyle confirmed their discovery through experiments and published the results. According to Robert Gunther and other authorities, Boyle's assistant Robert Hooke, who built the experimental apparatus, may well have helped to quantify the law; Hooke was accounted a more able mathematician than Boyle. Hooke also developed the improved vacuum pumps necessary for the experiments. The French physicist Edme Mariotte (1620-1684) discovered the same law independently of Boyle in 1676, so this law may be referred to as Mariotte's or the Mariotte-Boyle law.

[edit] Definition


[edit] Relation to kinetic theory and ideal gases

Boyle's law is the most fundamental of the three gas laws, which states the constant relationship between pressure and volume within a system which does not have pressure or temperature at extreme ranges; high pressure or temperatures showing deviations from the law.[3] The law was not likely to have deviations at the time of publication due to limits upon technology, but as further technological advances occurred limitations of the approach would have become known, as Boyle's law relates more effectively to real gases[3] due to its description of such gases consisting of large numbers of particles moving independently of each other.[3]
In 1738, Daniel Bernoulli derived Boyle's law using Newton's laws of motion with application on a molecular level, but remained ignored until circa 1845, when John Waterston published a paper building the main precepts of kinetic theory, but was rejected by the Royal Society of England until the later works of James Prescott Joule, Rudolf Clausius and Ludwig Boltzmann firmly established the kinetic theory of gases and brought attention to both the theories of Bernoulli and Waterston.[4]
In the later period between 1870 to 1910[4], the ongoing debate between proponents of Energetics and Atomism led Boltzmann to write a book in 1898, which endured criticism up to his suicide in 1901.[4] After the work of Albert Einstein in 1905 in the area of kinetic theory applied to the Brownian motion of a fluid-suspended particle which was confirmed in 1908 by Jean Perrin.[4] From these perspectives upon kinetic theory, the derivation of Boyle's Law can be achieved through it's assumptions.

[edit] Equation


An example of the constancy of pressure and volume within a closed system; fixed temperature ensures that energy transfer remains the same, but lessened volume increases the likelihood of collisions.


The mathematical equation for Boyle's law is:

where:
P is a pure number denoting the pressure of the system. V is the volume of the gas, in cubic centimeters K is a constant value representative of the pressure and volume of the system. So long as temperature remains constant at the same value the same amount of energy given to the system persists throughout it's operation and therefore, theoretically, the value of k will remain constant. However, due to the derivation of pressure as perpendicular applied force and the probabilistic likelihood of collisions with other particles through collision theory, the application of force to a surface may not be infinitely constant for such values of k, but will have a limit when differentiating such values over a given time.
Forcing the volume V of the fixed quantity of gas to increase, keeping the gas at the initially measured temperature, the pressure P must decrease proportionally. Conversely, reducing the volume of the gas increases the pressure.
Boyle's law is commonly used to predict the result of introducing a change, in volume and pressure only, to the initial state of a fixed quantity of gas. The "before" and "after" volumes and pressures of the fixed amount of gas, where the "before" and "after" temperatures are the same (heating or cooling will be required to meet this condition), are related by the equation:
p1V1 = p2V2 Since Temperature remains constant, the ratio of temperatures remains equal to the ratio of constants:

To substitute in an example for Boyle's law for the same system, using examples the relation is solved. Although this equation uses the same system to illustrate the similarities, because temperature is proportional to the volume-pressure constant attained from Boyle's Law, the same result is returned.

Boyle's law, Charles's Law, and Gay-Lussac's Law form the combined gas law. The three gas laws in combination with Avogadro's law can be generalized by the ideal gas law.

 

[theletch1]

Great! Thanks alot PPKO. I my brain short circuited half way through reading that post and now every smoke alarm in the house is going off. *twitch*:uhyeah:

 

[Big Don]

but, its a dry heat...

 

[RED]

Funny read yes but note no dates or details...umm...:

http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp

Still funny none the less.