Women Self Defence!

[jobo]

Come back to me when you’re a parent.

I won’t be forcing them into a hobby, I’ll be mandating a life skill. If they wish to continue it as a hobby, all the better. They’ll only be required to do it until they’re proficient. Past that is their prerogative.

If we had a pool, lake or ocean in our backyard, swimming lessons would be mandated too. They’d go until they could prove they wouldn’t drown simply by being in water too deep to touch the bottom. If they chose to go further with it or compete in it would be their choice. SD is no different in my eyes. If they don’t like it, tough sh!t. I didn’t like my father bringing me to his auto repair shop and teaching me how to fix my own car after the initial newness of it all wore off. As an adult I now understand why. I didn’t like it when I had to read for 20 minutes every night either.

I have a duty to protect my kids and just as importantly to teach them to protect themselves when I can’t. If they don’t appreciate that at the time, oh well; they’ll thank me later. I’ll do the absolute best I can to get them to have fun, buy into it and not shove it down their throats. But if push comes to shove, so be it.

Il i hear is pushy parent, its no different to those who think its in the kids interest to make them learn piano or play soccer or what have you. It's always,seems to be the things the parent did or wished they had. Sure get them to try it, but if they would sooner play net ball, then that's what they should be doing with their time

 

[jobo]

It doesn't have to be a hobby. It's like a science class. They should take it, learn it, then they can stop if they want.

he is point is they can't stop if they want, or he will take their phone of them or what have you.

 

[Monkey Turned Wolf]

Sorry cant agree with that mentality I just can't. Yes self defence is important of course it is but if they don't want to do it they won't be interested they won't do it right then once they are allowed to stop they'll completely forget it because they hate it and were forced into it. Kids should be allowed to choose their extra activities if they want martial arts great if they want to do tennis or football or gymnastics great. Obviously the really important stuff like English, maths things like that they have to do but anything outside of education should be their choice as long as their doing something.

How do you determine math is important (beyond basic algebra), but self protection is not? I think the reason those kids don' take it seriously is because they view it as a hobby they're going to be continued to force to do, and not as an additional skill to learn. If you present it a school, my bet is: if they like it they'll pay attention because they enjoy it and want to learn. If they don't like it, they'll try to learn it quickly, at least while they're at the class, and then stop. As an example, going off JR's post, I wasn't a fan of swimming lessons as a kid, but I was forced to do it. I took it seriously while I was there, specifically so I could swim long enough to satisfy my parents and stop. It ended up being useful because now I enjoy kayaking, canoeing, white water rafting, and sailing (and swimming), which I would not be comfortable doing if i had not learned to swim.

 

[JR 137]

he is point is they can't stop if they want, or he will take their phone of them or what have you.

Do you have something wrong with you? Your idiotic selective reading strikes again, Rain Man. They can stop any time after they’re proficient. Until they’re proficient, they’ll go. If they say “I’m not going” before they’re proficient then they’ll lose privileges. Not after they’re proficient. There’s a difference.

And again, I’m not forcing them into a hobby; defending themselves is a life skill. Once they’re proficient, then it’s hobby time if they so choose.

It’s like teaching them to read. Once they’re proficient, they can join the book club or burn their library card. Makes no difference to me. Until they can proficiently read, it’s not a choice. Edit: you’re a bit slow, so let me make that clear for you - that there is an analogy.

I can see reading COMPREHENSION wasn’t a very high priority for your skill set.

 

[CB Jones]

Do you have something wrong with you? Your idiotic selective reading strikes again, Rain Man. They can stop any time after they’re proficient. Until they’re proficient, they’ll go. If they say “I’m not going” before they’re proficient then they’ll lose privileges. Not after they’re proficient. There’s a difference.

And again, I’m not forcing them into a hobby; defending themselves is a life skill. Once they’re proficient, then it’s hobby time if they so choose.

It’s like teaching them to read. Once they’re proficient, they can join the book club or burn their library card. Makes no difference to me. Until they can proficiently read, it’s not a choice. Edit: you’re a bit slow, so let me make that clear for you - that there is an analogy.

I can see reading COMPREHENSION wasn’t a very high priority for your skill set.

Agree. I'm that way with firearms.

I didn't care if my son was interested or not in shooting.....he was going to learn how to safely handle firearms.....once he learned how to handle them I could care less if he ever wants to go shooting or not. I have at least made sure he has that knowledge.

 

[jobo]

How do you determine math is important (beyond basic algebra), but self protection is not? I think the reason those kids don' take it seriously is because they view it as a hobby they're going to be continued to force to do, and not as an additional skill to learn. If you present it a school, my bet is: if they like it they'll pay attention because they enjoy it and want to learn. If they don't like it, they'll try to learn it quickly, at least while they're at the class, and then stop. As an example, going off JR's post, I wasn't a fan of swimming lessons as a kid, but I was forced to do it. I took it seriously while I was there, specifically so I could swim long enough to satisfy my parents and stop. It ended up being useful because now I enjoy kayaking, canoeing, white water rafting, and sailing (and swimming), which I would not be comfortable doing if i had not learned to swim.

every thing is Important, just some things are more important than others, it more or less impossible to live a productive life unless you have some basic cognitive abilities around language and maths, where as lots of people get along just fine with out an ability to smash someone into the. Floor or swim for that matter, my inability to swim more than 20ft has caused me absolutely no problems my whole life. Even when canoeing they give me one of them float things

 

[jobo]

Do you have something wrong with you? Your idiotic selective reading strikes again, Rain Man. They can stop any time after they’re proficient. Until they’re proficient, they’ll go. If they say “I’m not going” before they’re proficient then they’ll lose privileges. Not after they’re proficient. There’s a difference.

And again, I’m not forcing them into a hobby; defending themselves is a life skill. Once they’re proficient, then it’s hobby time if they so choose.

It’s like teaching them to read. Once they’re proficient, they can join the book club or burn their library card. Makes no difference to me. Until they can proficiently read, it’s not a choice. Edit: you’re a bit slow, so let me make that clear for you - that there is an analogy.

I can see reading COMPREHENSION wasn’t a very high priority for your skill set.

and your going to force them to go, until you THINK,they are proficient,

so what level of proficiency are you setting to end this obsession ?

 

[Headhunter]

How do you determine math is important (beyond basic algebra), but self protection is not? I think the reason those kids don' take it seriously is because they view it as a hobby they're going to be continued to force to do, and not as an additional skill to learn. If you present it a school, my bet is: if they like it they'll pay attention because they enjoy it and want to learn. If they don't like it, they'll try to learn it quickly, at least while they're at the class, and then stop. As an example, going off JR's post, I wasn't a fan of swimming lessons as a kid, but I was forced to do it. I took it seriously while I was there, specifically so I could swim long enough to satisfy my parents and stop. It ended up being useful because now I enjoy kayaking, canoeing, white water rafting, and sailing (and swimming), which I would not be comfortable doing if i had not learned to swim.

You don't that knowing how to count and add up and take away and multiply is important?....

As jobo said just because that happened to you doesn't mean it's the same for everyone. I've seen so many kids dragged into martial arts and look genuinely miserable and upset in there. If anyone thinks that's right then there's an issue

 

[Monkey Turned Wolf]

Double post

 

[hoshin1600]

Things kids don't like..

1. Turkey
2. Cucumber
3. Vegetables
4. I kinda like school, a little bit but not a lot
5. My little brothers tv shows
6. Brushing teeth
7. Taking a shower

So says my 7yo when I asked.
point is there are a lot of things kids don't like. As parents we get to choose what is good for them. It's our job. No two children and no two situations are the same. Making a blanket statement about how a specific parent is raising their children shows a lack of understanding of complex issues. It is also incorrect to assume a parent can't change their mind on a decision that was made when the situation calls for it.
You all are arguing as if decisions are sent down from the heavens and written on a tablet to be enforced and obeyed for all of eternity.

 

[Gerry Seymour]

One of the things I hated most when I did some teaching or even when I was a kid training myself was kids who were forced to be there. Because simply its a waste of time they're not listening they won't be practicing at home so they won't remember things so the instructor has to repeat things again which wastes everyone's time, the instructors because he has to redo lessons, the kids who don't want to be there because they could be doing something they want and it's a waste to the kids who want to be there who have to wait for the ones who don't

I only taught kids for a short while, but I found the inattentive ones equally split between those who didn't want to be there (including those who chose the class, but didn't want to be there that particular day) and those who simply didn't think they should have to do all that work. The latter were more frustrating for me.

 

[Gerry Seymour]

he is point is they can't stop if they want, or he will take their phone of them or what have you.

The same would apply to that science class.

 

[Gerry Seymour]

and your going to force them to go, until you THINK,they are proficient,

so what level of proficiency are you setting to end this obsession ?

Obsession? Must you attempt to make every discussion an argument by the use of inflammatory language? (Or are you going to claim that's not inflammatory?)

 

[drop bear]

I see your reasoning....but I look at my 5'3" 105 lb wife and think....If a 200+ lb street thug attacked her....would she still be able to pull off grappling techniques as he is punching her full power? How effective is she going to be trying to out wrestle that guy?

For the most part, the most important thing in self defense is.......prevention! Also, having access to a weapon IMHO is a big advantage.

Be embarrasing if she got bashed by a 4 foot 100lb weakling though just because she couldn't fight.

 

[jobo]

Obsession? Must you attempt to make every discussion an argument by the use of inflammatory language? (Or are you going to claim that's not inflammatory?)

really, he says his young daughters MUST become proficient in ma and he will punish them if they refuse. Calling it obsessive is the least inflammable thing you could call it

 

[drop bear]

really, he says his young daughters MUST become proficient in ma and he will punish them if they refuse. Calling it obsessive is the least inflammable thing you could call it

That is how you train kids.

 

[Monkey Turned Wolf]

Double post

Somehow it showed up to me as a double post, despite apparently not being one.

You don't that knowing how to count and add up and take away and multiply is important?....

As jobo said just because that happened to you doesn't mean it's the same for everyone. I've seen so many kids dragged into martial arts and look genuinely miserable and upset in there. If anyone thinks that's right then there's an issue

I specifically stated besides basic algebra. I didn't particularly need to learn precalc, calc, or trig. Technically, there are probably people arguing about adding and multiplying too, since most people my age will use their calculator for anything beyond (and including) 2+2, and they're still capable of functioning. We still learn all of it.

As far as what Jobo said, I have no idea, I blocked him his first month here. He actively takes sentences out of context, changes their context to what he wants, and then argues against that. Not worth engaging with someone like that.

What you're discussing is different than what I (and I believe JR) are talking about. Similar to the swimming lessons I mentioned, what I believe he wants them to do is learn a specific skill, and once they learn that skill at a quantifiable level, that I assume they know, they are free to stop. And informing the child of why they are learning that skill That's different than most kids I see in MA classes, where they are being forced to engage in a non-ending hobby, likely without clear explanation of why they are stuck doing it, and no end in sight regardless of how well they do. Possibly the better they do, the more likely they'll have to continue.

To continue with the example of myself, with swimming I worked at it because I specifically knew when I could stop swimming lessons. At the same time, I was forced to practice piano, but without an end in sight. I had (and have) musical talent, so if it's something I wanted to continue I would have been very good, but for most of my childhood, I hated playing because I was forced, and I didn't understand why. I had to go to 3 different piano teachers as a kid because I was such a pest to them, and would be forced to practice at home. Very different than how I acted with MA (which I wanted to do) or swimming (which I didn't want to do, but was informed it was a specific skill I was learning for safety, and would end when I learned it). Honestly, I think if it was explained the way JR is suggesting it, a lot less children would have the attitude that you're talking about in MA classes.

 

[JR 137]

really, he says his young daughters MUST become proficient in ma and he will punish them if they refuse. Calling it obsessive is the least inflammable thing you could call it

You have some serious comprehension issues. You really should stop putting putting words into people’s mouths. Or stop putting your stupid spin on things.

If they refuse to go when it comes time to go, they’ll have the same consequences as when they refuse to do other important things I require them to do, such as homework, chores, etc.

If they don’t have any consequences for their actions, then they end up ruling the house.

For the record, they won’t be punished for not being proficient. They will lose privileges for not going. I know you won’t see the difference, but anyone with an ounce of comprehension will.

 

[JR 137]

You don't that knowing how to count and add up and take away and multiply is important?....

As jobo said just because that happened to you doesn't mean it's the same for everyone. I've seen so many kids dragged into martial arts and look genuinely miserable and upset in there. If anyone thinks that's right then there's an issue

I’ve seen plenty of kids dragged into academic school and look genuinely upset and miserable too. I’ve seen them dragged to their grandparents’ houses, parties, etc. So because they don’t like something that means the parents should give in?

SD is a life skill IMO. I’ll make it as fun and exciting as possible. I’ll let them choose which grappling school they go to. I’ll do it with them.

 

[JR 137]

and your going to force them to go, until you THINK,they are proficient,

so what level of proficiency are you setting to end this obsession ?

No obsession on my end. Seems like you’re obsessed that someone has a different point of view though.

What level of proficiency? They’ll have male training partners and teachers to gauge by. Being able to hold their own against their peers seems like a good level of proficiency. Probably around intermediate colored belt judo ranks. When they can consistently throw and get out of a mount from someone who’s a bit bigger and stronger than they are, I’ll be satisfied. If they can do that against trained peers who expect it and know how to counter it, they should be fine against someone who doesn’t see it coming.