The latter is certainly more likely.
Thanking of quitting for a while.
- Thread starter Ironbear24
- Start date
I think a short term solution would be learning how to fight those 130 pound, higher ranked speed demons.
My guess is he's been playing their game, not his. Tactically wrong, and frustrating as hell for a bigger fighter.
drop bear
Sr. Grandmaster
Yeah you cant be reactive. You have to force positions.
drop bear
Sr. Grandmaster
Then you have to train until you loose. That is what training is.
I mean if you do weights what you have a sook because you cant lift the last one?
Ok. so when is the next tournament you can enter?
I had a long post but decided to make it short and hope I can make the short stuff clear.
Instead of quitting ask for help. Also determine if you are actually failing. Sometimes students have in their minds that they should be at a certain point after a certain time. Instead of focusing on where you think you should be, focus on where you are. What you may discover is that the only reason you think you are failing is because you think you should be better than what you are at this point in your training.
As for sparring: Do you spar to learn or do you spar to win. The reason why I ask this is because people who spar to learn don't look at the beatings as beatings, They look at them as opportunity to learn. People who spar to win aren't interested in learning they are interesting in beating the other preson.
I personally think you are letting the test and your expectation interfere. Would you feel the same if there was no belt and no test, and if you spar to learn.
Instead of quitting ask for help. Also determine if you are actually failing. Sometimes students have in their minds that they should be at a certain point after a certain time. Instead of focusing on where you think you should be, focus on where you are. What you may discover is that the only reason you think you are failing is because you think you should be better than what you are at this point in your training.
This is part of the learning process in learning how to fight with martial arts.
As for sparring: Do you spar to learn or do you spar to win. The reason why I ask this is because people who spar to learn don't look at the beatings as beatings, They look at them as opportunity to learn. People who spar to win aren't interested in learning they are interesting in beating the other preson.
Open palm is a faster strike.
I personally think you are letting the test and your expectation interfere. Would you feel the same if there was no belt and no test, and if you spar to learn.
OP
OP
Ironbear24
Senior Master
With weights I expected to fail. Failure is a part of weight lifting and if you are not failing you are doing it wrooooooong.......
OK back to martial arts I go.
Langenschwert
Master Black Belt
And there's your answer. If it makes you feel any better, I struggle with Judo. I get my *** kicked six ways from Sunday all the time. But I always ask "show me how you did that". And bit by excruciating bit, I get better. It's not who's best, it's who stays.
oftheherd1
Senior Master
when I studied TKD, I had several "plateaus" where I was sure I wasn't learning anything. I thought about quitting. I don't really know what I can tell you that kept me going. But I did. And all of a sudden one day I would realize I had indeed progressed substantially.
But I think there may be other obstacles stopping you. First, you do need to understand that weight lifting may not help you with MA. In my experience, weight lifting tends to make one muscle bound. That tends to make one slower. Weightlifting doesn't emphasize speed. What are your priorities?
Failure ... What to do? I really don't know you well enough to be sure I can give you a correct answer as to how to avoid failure, short term or long term. I don't think it is even possible for most of us to constantly avoid some amount of failure. It is part of life. As others have mentioned, it is really up to you what you choose to do. Failure is only failure if you allow it to be.
But I think there may be other obstacles stopping you. First, you do need to understand that weight lifting may not help you with MA. In my experience, weight lifting tends to make one muscle bound. That tends to make one slower. Weightlifting doesn't emphasize speed. What are your priorities?
Failure ... What to do? I really don't know you well enough to be sure I can give you a correct answer as to how to avoid failure, short term or long term. I don't think it is even possible for most of us to constantly avoid some amount of failure. It is part of life. As others have mentioned, it is really up to you what you choose to do. Failure is only failure if you allow it to be.
The same goes for martial arts, IMO.
The problem with quitting "for a while" is that the excuses start to build and "a while" has a tendency to become "forever."
Training is series of advances, plateaus, and even retreats. And a whole lot more plateaus with incremental progress. Your first few months and years, there's always something new, something to advance and discover. And the pace is fast. After a decade or two... there's still more to learn, but the pace will slow down. You'll find your instructor correcting things you thought you knew cold because he's adding new elements and expecting a different level of integration (if you're lucky!). And it gets frustrating. That's a good time to help out in a beginner class, or work with new students. Their enthusiasm is infectious, and they're a reminder of your progress. Then -- you got back to working on the stuff that's got you stalled... because if you stay hanging out with the beginners, you'll stagnate.
Training is series of advances, plateaus, and even retreats. And a whole lot more plateaus with incremental progress. Your first few months and years, there's always something new, something to advance and discover. And the pace is fast. After a decade or two... there's still more to learn, but the pace will slow down. You'll find your instructor correcting things you thought you knew cold because he's adding new elements and expecting a different level of integration (if you're lucky!). And it gets frustrating. That's a good time to help out in a beginner class, or work with new students. Their enthusiasm is infectious, and they're a reminder of your progress. Then -- you got back to working on the stuff that's got you stalled... because if you stay hanging out with the beginners, you'll stagnate.
ks - learning to fly
Senior Master
the only way you can fail is if you don't try..
and everyone has plateaus - sounds like it's
time to dig in your heels and just keep pushing forward!!
and everyone has plateaus - sounds like it's
time to dig in your heels and just keep pushing forward!!
I think either method are roads to the same place. Both are good roads, IMO.
If it helps, try to train without expectations. Changes come when you're not looking.
It sound as if this is heavy on you my friend. Hey you know what, you are on here asking questions and looking advice so see? you have not given up and you are keeping going in your own way. So acknowledge at least your own spirit of perseverance and maybe you can utilise that in this situation? I want to ask you also have you checked with yourself honestly that your end goal is achievable for you? Wishes.
For something like martial arts, you can't just be focused on some distant "finish line." It's okay to have goals, both short term and long, but you need to be engaged in and appreciate the daily process or you'll never stick with it long enough to get anywhere. "Failure" is part of that daily process.
Strive to be remembered for being a good person who makes life better for those around you. Even if you become a really exceptional martial artist, most people in your life won't really care about it. It'll just be a bit of trivia they know about you - your favorite hobby.
That's an understandable desire. As I mentioned in a recent post, the drive for mastery - to feel that you are really good at something - is pretty fundamental to a lot of us. That said, the only way to get really good at something is to really suck at if for a long time. The biggest difference between a beginner and an expert is that the expert has made way, way more mistakes than the beginner and has "failed" more times than the beginner has even "tried."
This is a natural part of the learning process for just about anything. Your understanding and your standards increase faster than your ability, so you become increasingly aware of the distance between what you can do and what you want to be able to do. It can lead to the illusion that you are stagnating or regressing even though you are actually making progress. Just remember that it is an illusion. Many times this sort of feeling precedes a significant breakthrough in your advancement.
I'm not going to offer an opinion on whether you should continue in the martial arts. That comes down to you and what you get out of your training. I will say that if you want to achieve significant expertise in any field - watercolor painting, robotics, home remodeling, guitar playing, juggling, whatever - then you'll have to go through this same process - struggling, "failing", feeling like you aren't making progress, feeling like you are worse than the people around you, and so on. If you don't, there is a significant possibility that you are deluding yourself regarding your level of ability.
Kickboxer101
Master Black Belt
Fact is on this if you quit you absolutely do fail 100% fail but if you keep going you'll still succeed in some areas even if its different areas to what you want. You'll still learn you'll still be staying fit and healthy.
OP
OP
Ironbear24
Senior Master
I would still be weight lifting and have more time to put into that. So I would still be fit, it's a matter of would be content with just that. Even when I only weight lifted I still practiced my old kenpo stuff on the bag there. Went through my techniques and stuff at home and so on.
I got the guidence I needed when I signed up at this place because for a long time I had none of that being out of a dojo.
Oh and I think Drop bear asked when there is a next tournament I am going to? I am not sure, to be honest. The last one was last month and I wasn't invited to go. They only invite purple belt and above, I'm one belt below that. I could have still gone but my entrance fee would not have been covered and I'd pay out of pocket.
donald1
Senior Master
Martial arts can be difficult; one minute your doing good and everything is golden. Yet then you turn around and your instructor is getting onto you for every little detail constantly saying start over at even the slightest of mistakes.
Thats a big decision think it through. nobody is perfect. But we get back up, we keep trying and get better a little bit at a time. If you think quitting is really going to help im not gonna argue. But im pretty literally everyone here has felt that way atleast once. And before you decide think about (or write a list) of all the reasons YOU joined in the first place and ask yourself "should I put that on standby?"
Good luck!
Thats a big decision think it through. nobody is perfect. But we get back up, we keep trying and get better a little bit at a time. If you think quitting is really going to help im not gonna argue. But im pretty literally everyone here has felt that way atleast once. And before you decide think about (or write a list) of all the reasons YOU joined in the first place and ask yourself "should I put that on standby?"
Good luck!
Xue Sheng
All weight is underside
Training with a Chinese shifu who is rather traditional in his approach: no comment at all, just repeat, adjust, told you are doing it wrong, change, adjust, train more....10 years in he finally says...."good job"..... that right there is high praise. However for much of the 10 years prior you ask yourself rather frequently if you should just quit.
Flying Crane
Sr. Grandmaster
Ain't that the truth.
