You afraid to die?

[Jenna]

I'm not afraid to die, im afraid of what i would be doing when it happens or the last thing i did before it happens.

Hey mister mantis to have no fear of death is quite a thing. When you say you are afraid of what you would be doing but not of death itself does that imply you are a believer in the concepts of heaven and hell? Are you worried about getting "caught out"? I am sorry if I am misinterpreting what you have said. Thank you for sharing

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

Thanks for reminding me. I need to delete some porn...

:uhyeah:

Hey mister Kreth I can tell you have thought about this already Yeah reading some of your posts it is clear you are one of the masterdebaters on these forums! LOL, well you started it and there is me thinking that a cool musician would have groupies to satisfy their lustful whims? No? Man the touring scene just ain't what it is cracked up to be. I would say thanks for sharing but.... pfffft TOO much, ha!

Go easy now leave some for L8r, LOL

 

[Jenna]

Jenna,

A thought provoking question to be sure! *smile* Am I afraid to die? No, but I will be bummed when it happens. Am I afraid of the method of my death? Yes and my reasons are very immediate which I will explain.

I will be "bummed" on that final day because there will be no more "tomorrow". You see I love my life. I love cooking, training, working, talking, touching, loving, the whole she-bang as it were. My last day will mean that there will not be another day to experience and grow. It will be nice if there is a whole other level on the other side but I'm not banking on it. I am milking every last moment out of this life and in the end I want to be able to say something akin to a line from Gattaca: "I didn't save anything for the return trip".

Now to the method of my death, therein lies a more pressing issue. You see last year I was diagnosed with Diabetes, a disease that has touched my family many times, most recently by claiming the life of one of my cousins who was all of about 25 at the time. It's an insidious disease, chronic in nature and nasty in presentation and progression if left unmanaged. It brought my mortality to my immediate attention and it is never far from my thoughts. I have the specters of blindness and amputation singing backup to my old friend death and they are not the kind of groupies you want to party with.

I am not afraid of death, I just want to hit it at high speed with all my faculties and not burden the friends and family that make my life so rich and rewarding. I think we all here can think of people in our lives that we would be willing to die for. For me there are several for whom I would lay down my life for without hesitation. What my condition has forced me to realize is that the tough decisions I have to make in my everyday life such as what to eat, to go to the gym, to check my sugar levels are things that I do because I want to Live for those very same people and Live Well.

Perhaps I can offer this new interpretation of a classic line:

"Death is easy, Living Well is Hard..."

Rob

Hey Rob thank you for stopping by and I have to say I am amazed at your lack of fear over dying itself. But I doubt it is bravado from what I have read of yours and so I gotta hand it to you!! Yes diabetes wow... my dad has this and much fuss over keeping the sugar below 7 right? And yet he cannot help himself with a big gobful of Ben and Jerrys for which I am his worst enemy! so I understand maybe on some very distant plateau what you are saying. Be strong though, keep your mind open to the notion of regeneration. Belief is an unstoppable thing I am convinced of it.

For me it is a fear of drowning or suffocation having been hospitalized many times with asthma but these things are not to dwell on morbidly these are the things that Tsunetomo was imploring the warrior caste to think on to charge and envigorate their lives. What greater impetus to live our lives than the acknowledgement that they are finite. No more procrastination, no more daydreaming no more communicating in riddles with loved ones and friends.... maybe

I understand your "high speed" sentiment and giving your life for another and while this I think is the highest sacrifice I would URGE you never to willingly let yourself be a victim of your affliction. As martial artists we are fighters not victims. Fight it and BELIEVE you will win and NOTHING is impossible.

And hey if any well meaning soul gives you chocolate as a gift and you just know your doc will get all shouty at you for eating it well go on now post it to me LOL

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

Being here in Iraq I am faced daily with the very real truth that my physical end is just one mortar attack away; for my brothers on the line it is just one roadside bomb away; for my brothers in the air, it is just one RPG away.

I have the benefit of knowing this and living like its going to be tomorrow. Yes, I miss my family and hope that when the day comes for me to shake loose this earthly coil that it will be with them near and my son grown with children of his own. I, however, am also not afraid of death or dying because I know that it is an answer to my Lord's call and it is better to be absent in the body and present with the Lord. I know that until He is ready, not one hair on my head will see harm and when He is ready that nothing I do can stop it from happening. I know that He has given me my family and will care fore them much better than I ever could.

All that being said, I firmly believe that the Father has an "Idiot Clause"...go ahead and jump off of a building to see if he will save you, you just enacted the idot clause.

Trust God, but lock your car.

My two cents...

Hey there stone_dragone sir
Wow you are in Iraq right now?? Man I want to take a second to say I know you are just doing your job and your duty but THANK YOU for being there. Phew that is really something I can not say or begin to imagine! I could only ignorantly guess that the extreme position you are in is a touchpaper to your faith and belief and it is good and positive for you to have reconciliation between your faith and your situation. Thank you for sharing this and the Idiot Clause is a keeper for sure! And for the very little it is worth I wish you strength and hope that your morale and that of your unit is high and most of all safe home to you all.

And not that it will mean much but I can look it up but what is your rank if it is ok for me to ask?

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

I have thought about this from time to time. On a philosophical level, no I am not afraid to die. I don't WANT to die, I am not TRYING to die, but I don't think I am afraid of it. When my time comes, then I guess I will see if I can face it with calm and dignity.

I think most people aren't really afraid of being dead, but perhaps are afraid of the act of dying. It's quite a dramatic change to undergo. It can be painful, and it can be slow. Here's to hoping it's quick and painless!

Hey Michael
I completely agree with the sentiment you are relaying here and facing death with calm and dignity is certainly something to aspire to. I am certain you have been in dangerous situations before I wonder how you held it together maybe as some sort of a benchmark reaction for the curtain call?

Do you see yourself with the "famous last words" or maybe literally a few droll lines of gallows humour falling from your lips? Is that the sort of dignity you mean? I don' t know I cannot imagine....

But yeah quick and painless would be best and I am sure I can think of some pretty nice ways to go... ahem Thanks Michael for sharing.

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[mantis]

Hey mister mantis to have no fear of death is quite a thing. When you say you are afraid of what you would be doing but not of death itself does that imply you are a believer in the concepts of heaven and hell? Are you worried about getting "caught out"? I am sorry if I am misinterpreting what you have said. Thank you for sharing

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

Regardless. Would you want your life to end when you are doing something good and honorable, or doing something stupid?

 

[Jenna]

Regardless. Would you want your life to end when you are doing something good and honorable, or doing something stupid?

Hey mister mantis
Yes I understand what you mean. Personally if I ever get around to doing something good or honourable I will be in a better position to compare

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[mantis]

Hey mister mantis
Yes I understand what you mean. Personally if I ever get around to doing something good or honourable I will be in a better position to compare

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

I'm sure you already do

 

[Jenna]

I'm not afraid to die; not looking forward to it; I plan on resisting, kicking and screaming every step of the way though.

Hey there Ray
I like your attitude I really do but.... what happens if ya don't see it coming? Like those old Chaplin or Stooges films how do you kick and scream and resist an upright piano on the head?? Thanks for this!

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Rich Parsons]

A pointed and personal but very simple question for all my soft-outer hard-inner Martial Talk thinkers

Good Idea.

Just looking for a paragraph of inspiration I never quite seem to get what I want picking random books..... but anyway I found this and it is an exhortation to perform daily meditation on INEVITABLE death..... Hmmm and well that's the Hagakure for ya and yes right here Ch 11 if yous do not believe me and I know a very few of us would claim to walk a warriors path to that extent or anything like it but I think it is an interesting thought beyond its face value because maybe it is an exhortation NOT to be morose but because thinking of our death can shake us awake and make us realise what we are LIVING for.

This is true for many.

So.... if you have ever performed that meditation or had a passing thought for your own death.... Q: are you afraid to die, afraid of the WAY you might die, afraid of the what after?

Thank you for sharing
Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

I have thought about this. :asian:

Q: are you afraid to die,

No.

afraid of the WAY you might die,

I had read a story in High School about a person who as alive and yet could not move or communicate.

This used to bother me.

Then I went through a long period in HS where I watch my Mom die of Cancer. I thought about death a lot then. I realized there is no real nice way to be dead.

Although recently, with some older relatives and memory issues and also stroke issues and the loss of mobility has come back into my mind again.

I am debating with myself right now what is worse.

Loosing Memory and not knowing?

Loosing Physical Capability to move and ability to communicate, but to still have the capaibility to think and comprehend.

I am debating and thinking that it is the state of being aware but unable to move and or communicate with others.

afraid of the what after?

No, I have lived my life the best I can. A small joke I have with a friend of mine:

Friend: In Heaven ready to go to earth, Hey look there is a short line over there?

Me: What is it?

Friend: It says Job.

Me: Hey who needs a carear anyways lets go for the Job.

*** Welcome to the Life of JOB. ***

No disrespect to religions or Christianity, just a small joke between friends.

 

[Jenna]

I don't believe I am afraid of death. I don't feel as though I have to "do things" before I die. I am content with what I have experienced. However, it breaks my heart to think of the sorrow my loved ones will feel when that time comes. At the very least I hope that I remain long enough to see my son become an adult so that I know my job of preparing him for the world is finished, although, I prefer to meet death peacefully as an old man with my loved ones around. Lastly, I hope I can leave my loved ones with plenty of fond memories to last them the rest of their lives.

Hey David
Yes I agree the pain of the ones left behind is the hardest thing to get a grip on and so how much worse for you thinking of your son. But life does go on somehow and I do not think it is a bad thing to think on our deaths as a reminder perhaps not to treat our loved ones and friends as unfairly or even plain badly as we sometimes do for we may fall out the one day and have no one to make up the next.

I think you are spot on though regarding the perpetuity of memories these never leave us and even though they fade or blur they are still imprinted in us like old files on your PC you might think you deleted them from out of the recycle bin but they are never truly gone until the disk is wiped Thank you for sharing this!

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

I'm not really afraid of dying, I'm more afraid of how I'll die (being a vol firefighter I've seen all KINDS of bad deaths ) and the impact it will have on my wife.

Hey mister fireman00
Man! So you are another one out there risking your neck for all of us. That makes you something special and I think it is just WAY too easy to overlook guys like you out there with no greater thought than preserving life. This is amazing and thank you for making me think about what you are doing.

I would love to not be afraid of dying but find that an incredibly difficult one to grasp. I wonder how you have managed to do that yourself? But yes there are many gruesome and horrible ways to die between accidents criminality and disease so much to choose from huh? But this I would wish to make us think on the here and the now and stop wasting time and words....

I wish God speed you home to your wife and the old pilots' adage is true about any landing you walk away from... I wonder do pilots really have that belief or with all their technology and reliability is it just lipservice? As you are in extreme situations I guess quite a lot do you have a similar "any landing..." viewpoint? Thank you!

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

Good Idea.



This is true for many.



I have thought about this. :asian:



No.



I had read a story in High School about a person who as alive and yet could not move or communicate.

This used to bother me.

Then I went through a long period in HS where I watch my Mom die of Cancer. I thought about death a lot then. I realized there is no real nice way to be dead.

Although recently, with some older relatives and memory issues and also stroke issues and the loss of mobility has come back into my mind again.

I am debating with myself right now what is worse.

Loosing Memory and not knowing?

Loosing Physical Capability to move and ability to communicate, but to still have the capaibility to think and comprehend.

I am debating and thinking that it is the state of being aware but unable to move and or communicate with others.



No, I have lived my life the best I can. A small joke I have with a friend of mine:

Friend: In Heaven ready to go to earth, Hey look there is a short line over there?

Me: What is it?

Friend: It says Job.

Me: Hey who needs a carear anyways lets go for the Job.

*** Welcome to the Life of JOB. ***

No disrespect to religions or Christianity, just a small joke between friends.

Hey big Rich Thank you for this. Yes I too watched a very close and dear friend die from cancer days after his 23rd birthday he was just over six months from diagnosis to his last breath. This is a disease I despise so I can relate to the horror you must have gone through with your mother. But yet you came through you are still here and so the conclusion is time is a healer after we are gone for those we leave is this how you see it?

There is really NO pleasant state of vegetation mental or physical I believe this would be the hell for many people of seeing a face but not being able to reach out or of recognising a voice but not knowing who was speaking to you. Nope I will take a lightning bolt or better yet dies peacefully in sleep at the age of 120, LOL.

Actually is there anything to be said for living fast and dying young? You strike me as someone who might have a view....

Oh and one other pertinent question Rich, what happens to you personally when you go?

Thank you again for sharing

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

Personally, I don't see the point in being afraid to die. No matter how much you want to, you won't be able to prevent it. Nor am I particularly afraid of how I will die, since once it happens, that won't really matter.

I hope it's not through my own stupidity, and try daily to remove that potential cause, but we all have those moments...

In the end (pun intended), I guess it's true that you need to plan for the future but live each day as if it's your last. Don't hold grudges, especially against those you love, and let them know you love them at every opportunity. You never know when your last opportunity to tell them might come.

Hey Nomad
You are quite correct fear serves no purpose whether in a fight or when facing death. Fear however has a way of breaking any fences you might put up to keep it under control don' t you think?

Ahh, live each day as if it is your last. I love this sentiment and I wish I could abide by it would I be here doing what I am doing all the mundane stuff or would I be off exploring the world exploring myself seeking knowledge and enlightenment and fun and thrill that would be great but like most of us I do not do these things or live my life as if tomorrow I die. And the reason? I do not believe I will die tomorrow. I almost WISH for a crash believe me and god forgive me for it but I have sat on a plane and wished forit to come down and to survive it because aircrash survivors must have a calmness and a sense of no fear that few of us will ever have. Odd maybe but well....

But yes the live each day as though it were your last is a nice thought but maybe not workable for most of us.

oh btw are you a nomad with a direction or are you wandering aimless like Kane in Kung Fu?

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

I am afraid of the many nasty long pain filled ways I might die but I accept the fact that it will happen someday and will face it as bravely as i can. Actualy i am interested to see if any thing comes after but Im not in any rush to find out.

Hey tshadowchaser
So you so not know what comes after? What do you believe? Maybe soul and spirit really is nothing more than electrical sparks across neural synapses and once that stops a blank maybe and a ceasing to exist? Or maybe you will reincarnate and maybe you are already a reincarnation who knows. What do you think?

btw, what does your username mean please?

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[Jenna]

"So live your life that the fear of death can never enter your heart. Trouble no one about their religion; respect others in their view and demand that they respect yours. Love your life, perfect your life, beautify all things in your life. Seek to make your life long and its purpose in service of your people. Prepare a noble death song for the day when you cross over the great divide.

Always give a word or a sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, even a stranger, when in a lonely place. Show respect to all and grovel to none. When you arise in the morning give thanks for the food and for the joy of living. If you see no reason for giving thanks, the fault lies only in yourself. Abuse no one and nothing, for abuse turns the wise one to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.

When it comes your time to die, be not like those whose hearts are filled with the fear of death, so that when their time comes they weep and pray for a little more time to live their lives over again in a different way. Sing your death song and die like a hero going home." -Chief Tecumseh

:asian:
​

Hey mister green meanie
This is a very thoughtful quote thank you. Is this an otherwise random thought or have you chosen this as a reflection of how YOU live YOUR life and face YOUR death? Will you "sing your death song and die like a hero going home"? Because those you leave behind will they be grateful for a heroic death song? And you will be too overcome with sadness at leaving them for acting like a hero. Is this right?? Me? it will inevitably be more a whimper and a gasp than a rebel yell.

Still this is a provoking and meaningful quote and I would not wish to take that away from you. Thank you sincerely for sharing.

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

 

[lonecoyote]

My father taught me how to die. Brave, kind, last three months after his bypasses, amputations, and kidney removal were some of the best of my life. He became fearless, somehow manifested a fearless heart, let all the love he had show right on his sleeve. I used to wheel him out to the seawall and we would talk for hours, also stopping and talking to folks, strangers who would stop and were somehow drawn to him. His death was slow and painful, but also like the most noble movie you've ever seen or book you've ever read. Amazing and transcendant. Not too many drugs, he bore the pain as an obligation, not too much sadness, a little crying here and there mostly with a hug. When it was time to go, he fought like hell, not because he was afraid but because he said that is what you're supposed to do.

 

[green meanie]

Hey mister green meanie
This is a very thoughtful quote thank you. Is this an otherwise random thought or have you chosen this as a reflection of how YOU live YOUR life and face YOUR death? Will you "sing your death song and die like a hero going home"? Because those you leave behind will they be grateful for a heroic death song? And you will be too overcome with sadness at leaving them for acting like a hero. Is this right?? Me? it will inevitably be more a whimper and a gasp than a rebel yell.

Still this is a provoking and meaningful quote and I would not wish to take that away from you. Thank you sincerely for sharing.

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

The quote seemed very much in line with the question asked. If anything is gained from it I hope it's the acceptance that for better or worse this is the life we've been given and we should try to make the most of it. Sometimes we're dealt a crappy hand but what the hell, play it anyway -'cause playing and losing is still better than not getting to play at all. Regards.
:asian:

 

[green meanie]

Here's another. Enjoy:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

 

[Rich Parsons]

Hey big Rich Thank you for this. Yes I too watched a very close and dear friend die from cancer days after his 23rd birthday he was just over six months from diagnosis to his last breath. This is a disease I despise so I can relate to the horror you must have gone through with your mother. But yet you came through you are still here and so the conclusion is time is a healer after we are gone for those we leave is this how you see it?

Time is a healer for those left behind. It is longer for some than for others. My mom was diagnosed and had surgery and the could not identify it and closed it backup. The Sloan-Kettering Research facilty in New York ended up getting the data and determining it was Adrenil Cancer and they wanted her out there in a couple of weeks. She lived in lots of pain and suffereing for just over three years of treatments and procedures.

My Brother was younger than I and I think it took him longer than me to recover as he was upset when 7 years later My dad wanted to re-marry.

There is really NO pleasant state of vegetation mental or physical I believe this would be the hell for many people of seeing a face but not being able to reach out or of recognising a voice but not knowing who was speaking to you. Nope I will take a lightning bolt or better yet dies peacefully in sleep at the age of 120, LOL.

Dying at an old age would be nice if I know who I am and can get around still.

Actually is there anything to be said for living fast and dying young? You strike me as someone who might have a view....

Given my stupidity from my younger years I think I am living on borrowed time now. Which may explain why I am into fast cars and driving them as such. I have a cruiser bike but thinking about the Kawasaki Ninja ZX, only I have to pay off some bills first.

Oh and one other pertinent question Rich, what happens to you personally when you go?

Thank you again for sharing

Yr most obdt hmble srvt,
Jenna

Well since I have not burst into flames when I walk onto holy ground, I assume my Zen like beliefs will allow for further contemplation on a higher plane of existence. I said Zen Like, as I walk my own path, but do not find a religion that fits. Maybe have a beer or two with old friends, and discuss the meaning of existence. Maybe spend some more time re-incarnated back on earth not truly sure.

Although I would like to have an old fashioned Cremation with a huge fire and roaring logs. Think Norse or Celt like.

This way my atoms are returned into the enviroment to be used again, and not sealed in the ground in cement. (* Just my thoughts and as I said this is my path and thoughts not trying to say it is right or wrong or if other should follow or not, just making a statement. *)