The parrot

[Grenadier]

[FONT=verdana, arial, helvetica]Taken from another forum:[/FONT]
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[FONT=verdana, arial, helvetica]A woman went to a pet shop & immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot..

There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00.

"Why so little," she asked the pet store owner.

The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to live in a house of Prostitution and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff."

The woman thought about this, but decided she had to have the bird anyway.

She took it home and hung the bird's cage up in her living room and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said "New house, new madam."

The woman was a bit shocked at the implication, but then thought "that's really not so bad."

When her 2 teenage daughters returned from school the bird saw them and said, "New house, new madam, new girls."

The girls and the woman were a bit offended but then began to laugh about the situation considering how and where the parrot had been raised.

Moments later, the woman's husband Keith came home from work.

The bird looked at him and said,

"Hi, Keith!"[/FONT]

 

[shesulsa]

Pwned!!!! :lfao::rofl::lfao:

 

[bydand]

:lfao: That is too funny. :lfao:

 

[Xue Sheng]

:lfao:

And then it became the Monty Python Dead parrot sketch

 

[terryl965]

That was too funny

 

[Shaderon]

Fantastic

 

[Lisa]

:lfao:

 

[JBrainard]

:lol:

 

[bluemtn]

Uh- oh!!! That was great!

 

[Kacey]

Shortly after which, the parrot enters this joke:

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]A guy named Keith received a parrot for his birthday. The parrot was fully-grown, with a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren’t expletives were, to say the least, rude.

Keith tried hard to change the bird's attitude and was constantly saying polite words, playing soft music, anything he could think of to try and set a good example. Nothing worked. He yelled at the bird and the bird yelled back. He shook the bird and the bird just got angrier and ruder.

Finally, in a moment of desperation, Keith put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird squawk and kick and scream. Then suddenly there was quiet. Not a sound for half a minute.

Keith was frightened that he might have hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Keith's extended arm and said, "I believe that I might have offended you with my rude language and actions. I will endeavor to correct my behavior. I really am truly sorry and beg your forgiveness."

Keith was astonished at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what had made such a dramatic change when the parrot continued, "May I ask what the chicken did?"[/FONT]