Dallas Cowboys to change team name!

Bob Hubbard

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=====

Dallas, Texas

Dallas Cowboys WR, Terrell Owens silenced critics today by putting up STUNNING numbers. In an unprecidented performance, he had 5 receptions for 45 yards, 3 touchdowns, with his longest play for 21 yards. Dallas defeated the 1-4 Houston Texans 34-6.

Owens has been quoted in several interviews, saying "That's what happens when you throw me the damn ball!" Since the finish of the game, all NFL affiliates have been showing brilliant montages of the star's spectacular performances. He (Owens) has also mentioned a sequal to former Cowboys/Buccanneers/Jets and current Panthers receiver, Keyshawn Johnson's book entitled Just Gimme the Damn Ball to be released around January, 2007.

The Cowboys, so thrilled with Owen's brilliant performance today have stepped up and offered a deal to their all star receiver. The team will change their name from the Dallas Cowboys to the Dallas Terrell Owenses. The stipulations of the deal are as followed:

A...The team will be renamed the Dallas Terrell Owenses.

B...The star on the helmet will be replaced with a likeness of Terrell Owens.

C...Players on the Dallas Terrell Owenses will legally change their names to reflect the respect for Terrell Owens.

D...Since Houston is in the same state as the Dallas Terrell Owenses, the Houston Texans will have to change their name to the Houston Texowens.

NFL Commisoner, Roger Goodell said that he agrees with the decision, and that this all star receiver finally be paid his due.

Several team members have spoken since this deal took place. Dallas QB, Drew Bledsowens said "I think its great. We have all united around him (Terrell Owens) and we are finally ready to take the next step."

Dallas kicker, Mike Vanderowens said "We are very glad that this gifted star has taken us under his wing. Maybe now, we can win a Superbowl!"

But, the most emotional speech came from the Dallas Terrell Owenses coach, Bill Parcowens. With a tear in his eye, he said "Terrell (Owens) has ressurected my coaching carreer, and for that, I am eternally grateful."

Dallas Terrell Owenses owner, Jerry Jowens was unavailable for comment, as he was busy treating Terrell Owens to a 2 million dollar bottle of wine.

Our team of reporters caught up with the star, and asked him what was next for the Dallas Terrell Owenses. "Well, I've thought all along that most teams need a Terrell Owens in their lineup. Since I can't play for every team, I've been in contact with (local cloning company) Clone 'a' Corp. I'm going to clone myself, and sell my clones to other teams for 20 million each. Teams like the Texowens could have 3 of my clones, and get to the Superbowl. The catch? Glad you asked." (We didn't ask.) "The catch is that if a team buys one of my clones, they have to change their name to represent. Like, if the Cleveland Browns bought a Terrell Owens clone, they would have to change their name to the Cleveland Browens. Also, if the team is using my clone, and they play the Dallas Terrell Owenses, the clone has to sit out that game. Know what I'm sayin?"

We do know what you're saying, Terrell Owens. And, we wish you and the Dallas Terrell Owenses the best of luck.
 

terryl965

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Man I knew Owens will start his crap like always what a waste of talent
 

Hand Sword

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Found elsewhere...
=====

Dallas, Texas

Dallas Cowboys WR, Terrell Owens silenced critics today by putting up STUNNING numbers. In an unprecidented performance, he had 5 receptions for 45 yards, 3 touchdowns, with his longest play for 21 yards. Dallas defeated the 1-4 Houston Texans 34-6.

Owens has been quoted in several interviews, saying "That's what happens when you throw me the damn ball!" Since the finish of the game, all NFL affiliates have been showing brilliant montages of the star's spectacular performances. He (Owens) has also mentioned a sequal to former Cowboys/Buccanneers/Jets and current Panthers receiver, Keyshawn Johnson's book entitled Just Gimme the Damn Ball to be released around January, 2007.

The Cowboys, so thrilled with Owen's brilliant performance today have stepped up and offered a deal to their all star receiver. The team will change their name from the Dallas Cowboys to the Dallas Terrell Owenses. The stipulations of the deal are as followed:

A...The team will be renamed the Dallas Terrell Owenses.

B...The star on the helmet will be replaced with a likeness of Terrell Owens.

C...Players on the Dallas Terrell Owenses will legally change their names to reflect the respect for Terrell Owens.

D...Since Houston is in the same state as the Dallas Terrell Owenses, the Houston Texans will have to change their name to the Houston Texowens.

NFL Commisoner, Roger Goodell said that he agrees with the decision, and that this all star receiver finally be paid his due.

Several team members have spoken since this deal took place. Dallas QB, Drew Bledsowens said "I think its great. We have all united around him (Terrell Owens) and we are finally ready to take the next step."

Dallas kicker, Mike Vanderowens said "We are very glad that this gifted star has taken us under his wing. Maybe now, we can win a Superbowl!"

But, the most emotional speech came from the Dallas Terrell Owenses coach, Bill Parcowens. With a tear in his eye, he said "Terrell (Owens) has ressurected my coaching carreer, and for that, I am eternally grateful."

Dallas Terrell Owenses owner, Jerry Jowens was unavailable for comment, as he was busy treating Terrell Owens to a 2 million dollar bottle of wine.

Our team of reporters caught up with the star, and asked him what was next for the Dallas Terrell Owenses. "Well, I've thought all along that most teams need a Terrell Owens in their lineup. Since I can't play for every team, I've been in contact with (local cloning company) Clone 'a' Corp. I'm going to clone myself, and sell my clones to other teams for 20 million each. Teams like the Texowens could have 3 of my clones, and get to the Superbowl. The catch? Glad you asked." (We didn't ask.) "The catch is that if a team buys one of my clones, they have to change their name to represent. Like, if the Cleveland Browns bought a Terrell Owens clone, they would have to change their name to the Cleveland Browens. Also, if the team is using my clone, and they play the Dallas Terrell Owenses, the clone has to sit out that game. Know what I'm sayin?"

We do know what you're saying, Terrell Owens. And, we wish you and the Dallas Terrell Owenses the best of luck.

Well it's about time! How 'Bout Them Cow Boys!
 

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