Certain time. Certain places?

[IcemanSK]

I've been training for nearly 25 years & have no trouble going at it hard on the mat or in the ring. I'm very proud that in that time, I've never needed to use my physical skils outside of the gym. In college (no thanks to "RoadHouse") I did spend way to much time trying to "protect" friends in need. (It took me a while to realize they brought trouble on themselves). At 39, I have neither the time or energy to ever play the "tough guy." I tell you this only to share my background.

I had a conversation yesterday with some co-workers at a conference. I work as a case manager with homeless folks. The subject of security came up. The place I work now is the only place I've worked (in 8 years of this work) that has security staff. For me, it's never been a thought, honestly. One gal told of co-workers being stabbed by clients in the past & the need for others to be aware that it can happen & protect one'sself against such things.

It got me thinking whether I tend to compartmentalize my training for a certain time, place & attire. I want to be able to protect myself and/or coworkers, if needed. Being aware & ready for something to happen is one thing. Being paranoid is another.

Does anyone else struggle with this trying to find this balance?

 

[SFC JeffJ]

I have and still occasionally do. Really about the only advice I can give is be alert to your surroundings but not worried. I know, easier said than done.

 

[morph4me]

Think about it the same way you think about walking across the street, looking both ways doesn't make you paranoid, it shows that you are aware of the possibility of being hit by a car. That same mindset works in your daily life, awareness of the possiblity that you can be victimized doesn't make you paranoid just aware, and that's a good thing, and if anything happens you'll be in a position to take appropriate action.

 

[Infinite]

I find I have a pretty good balance actually. It came to me naturally so I'm not sure if I can help you find it.

Basically I work off of triggers. If there are no triggers I tend to be pretty mellow but as the triggers increase you see my alertness increase.

So an example,

Proximity Trigger
Speed Trigger
Motion Trigger

Basic ones I use to determine if someone is approaching me in a way that makes me unhappy. Bearly anyone over my life has ever triggered these I'm usually pretty mellow

How ever when suddenly my perception keys in on "That guy is moving faster than he needs to" I start to look for other triggers. Such as where is he going? Does he have a reason to be moving that fast?

So I guess evaluation is the key. If you are reacting to stimuli with no evaluation you are paranoid. If you evaluate it at each stage then you are not paranoid you are effecient.

my 2 cents.

--Infy

 

[Carol]

Whether you are a martial artist or not...there is a lot to be said for common sense. When I was in college I used to scoff a bit about going out after dark or being out late.

Now that I work 2nd shift and I'm always on the road after midnight, I see first hand that the advice is totally sound. There is a lot of bad stuff...even in "safe places" that goes on those hours of the night that doesn't happen during the evening or during the day. It really surprised me. Crime statistics don't tell the whole story either.

 

[IcemanSK]

Whether you are a martial artist or not...there is a lot to be said for common sense. When I was in college I used to scoff a bit about going out after dark or being out late.

Now that I work 2nd shift and I'm always on the road after midnight, I see first hand that the advice is totally sound. There is a lot of bad stuff...even in "safe places" that goes on those hours of the night that doesn't happen during the evening or during the day. It really surprised me. Crime statistics don't tell the whole story either.

I try to be aware of what may happen. I'm keenly aware of it at my job. We had one client who barracaided (sp?) my coworker (a smaller, younger female) into the office with him. She called 911 & told them what was going on with no hestitation (yeah for her!). The client was removed by the police & expelled from the program! When this chuckledhead wanted come back in & explain to me why he should be let back in, I politly got in his space (but I was very polite) & told him that he was tresspassing & needed to leave immediately.

He got the message & left. I have no tolerance for someone who pushes around those who are perceived as "weaker" or can be "easily intimidated."

 

[The Kidd]

Sounds like you answered your own question, you have a perception, you are in a helping field which requires compassion and certain amount of trust but you realized that there was a situation that needed handling and you did it. It seems to me you are more conscience of things around you than you know. I run in the same circles I am in a helping field and it requires a great deal of patience and compassion but it can be violent at times. Using a "Roadhouse" reference I am nice until it is time not to be nice anymore.

 

[IcemanSK]

Sounds like you answered your own question, you have a perception, you are in a helping field which requires compassion and certain amount of trust but you realized that there was a situation that needed handling and you did it. It seems to me you are more conscience of things around you than you know. I run in the same circles I am in a helping field and it requires a great deal of patience and compassion but it can be violent at times. Using a "Roadhouse" reference I am nice until it is time not to be nice anymore.

The situation I refered to wasn't an "in the moment" kind of thing. It was at least a day of two after the initial incident w/ my coworker. Honestly, I had quite a head of steam going in reference to him. I'd heard the story of the time before & wanted to let him know he wasn't welcome. I was anything but calm on the inside. I kept smiling the whole time to remind myself to not thump him.

I'm just not sure that, if I were talking with a client who pulled a knife, that I would handle it the way I wanted to. Cuz I'm not wearin' my pj's & am well stretched.

 

[Infinite]

The situation I refered to wasn't an "in the moment" kind of thing. It was at least a day of two after the initial incident w/ my coworker. Honestly, I had quite a head of steam going in reference to him. I'd heard the story of the time before & wanted to let him know he wasn't welcome. I was anything but calm on the inside. I kept smiling the whole time to remind myself to not thump him.

I'm just not sure that, if I were talking with a client who pulled a knife, that I would handle it the way I wanted to. Cuz I'm not wearin' my pj's & am well stretched.

So one of the great things I love about MA is the concept of forget what you know. Learn what you must and forget what you've learned.

Take for example the one time someone threw a punch at me that was a sucker punch. I high blocked stepped in and pushed with both hands to send the dude onto his back. I then got the heck out of there!

What I remember is, Sorta blocking and shouldering the guy and backing up. I had to actually go back and retrace this all in my head before I figured out what I had actually done.

I'm sure you know this so I'm not sure why you don't trust it. If someone were to pull a knife on you don't you think all those years of training would kick in and you'd respond? I mean yeah after the adrenalin runs off you may have pulled a muscle or tore a tendon because you didn't stretch and went full bore from nothing.

I'd rather be sore and alive than dead

--Infy

 

[jks9199]

I've been training for nearly 25 years & have no trouble going at it hard on the mat or in the ring. I'm very proud that in that time, I've never needed to use my physical skils outside of the gym. In college (no thanks to "RoadHouse") I did spend way to much time trying to "protect" friends in need. (It took me a while to realize they brought trouble on themselves). At 39, I have neither the time or energy to ever play the "tough guy." I tell you this only to share my background.

I had a conversation yesterday with some co-workers at a conference. I work as a case manager with homeless folks. The subject of security came up. The place I work now is the only place I've worked (in 8 years of this work) that has security staff. For me, it's never been a thought, honestly. One gal told of co-workers being stabbed by clients in the past & the need for others to be aware that it can happen & protect one'sself against such things.

It got me thinking whether I tend to compartmentalize my training for a certain time, place & attire. I want to be able to protect myself and/or coworkers, if needed. Being aware & ready for something to happen is one thing. Being paranoid is another.

Does anyone else struggle with this trying to find this balance?

It depends on what your goal in training is. If your goal is self-defense -- compartmentalizing it is a problem. If your goal is fitness and family fun on Tuesdays & Thursdays -- go ahead and compartmentalize it.

But you say your goal is self protection. You can't compartmentalize that. I don't stop being aware of my environment, even at home. I don't limit my practice to sweats, a gi or some other outfit. I've practiced with my duty belt; I've practiced with jeans, sneakers, boots, and so on. I know how each effects what I can and cannot do.

Sounds like you've got some work to do to break your training out of that shell... Good luck!

 

[Last Fearner]

I'm just not sure that, if I were talking with a client who pulled a knife, that I would handle it the way I wanted to. Cuz I'm not wearin' my pj's & am well stretched.

I think you bring up an excellent point here, Iceman! I can relate to a lot of what you are saying. When I was younger, I hung out with rough friends, in rough places. I prided myself on never getting into fights, but when there was trouble, or a threat to my friends, I was quick to intervene, and let the rival boys know that they were messing with fire. I've had my friends call me up at home, in the middle of the night, to come bail them out of a bad situation.

Having gone into Law Enforcement, and the Security Industry, I have applied my Martial Art awareness, and preparedness in ways that most others do not. Some have labeled it as "paranoid," but as Henry Kissinger said, "Even a paranoid has some real enemies!" I have had many of the same thoughts you are talking about with regards to what I'm wearing, what are the circumstances, and do I keep my mind on full alert even when I'm in a seemingly passive and safe environment.

I agree with what Infinite has said about watching for "triggers" or red flags so to speak, and responding accordingly, however I also believe that some things occur rapidly, with little or no warning. I also agree with Infinite that your many years of training will likely kick in, and you will be able to respond, and handle these kinds of situations better than you might think. There is always a feeling of uncertainty until the first time it happens.

I would like to specifically address those questions of clothing, stretching to be ready, and your mind-set in different situations. First, clothing is always a concern. Our Martial Art uniforms ("P.J.s" as some would say) give plenty of room for moment. If you choose to wear tight jeans when casual or dress pants when at work, these might not allow certain kicks, or freedom of movement in all directions. Slick street shoes, or heavy boots can throw off your well-rehearsed defense tactics. I choose to dress in loose fitting clothes, or flexible material whenever I can (that's why Chuck Norris came out with the "kicking jeans" - :ultracool ).

In reality, you need to train at times in street type clothes, and practice doing effective defense with limited movements. Often, due to environment such as office furniture, slippery floors, or icy sidewalks (like our current winter weather here in Michigan) you have to adjust the type of tactics you would use. If you train regularly, you should be able to do most techniques while "cold," without a warm-up stretch, with the possible exception of a head-high kick, but you wouldn't need to do that anyhow.

The main thing is being mentally prepared. If you do let your guard down at all, because of the relatively calm environment, then you might be vulnerable to a surprise attack. How do you prepare your mind without becoming paranoid? Here is the difference in my way of thinking. I am always looking at everyone in every situation I am in and taking mental note of how they could possibly attack me, and what my response might be. At any given moment, in any normal daily situation, I might mentally run through a dozen different scenarios where a friendly person suddenly lunges with a weapon, or terrorists crash though a window with swords and automatic weapons. I briefly plan out my options, then move on with whatever task is at hand.

The difference between my constant state of preparedness and a paranoid mind, is that I know these things are very unlikely to happen, but I choose to be prepared for anything, whereas a paranoid person actually believes these things are going to happen. When walking down the street, a paranoid person is convinced that there is someone around the next corner waiting to attack. I, on the other hand, do not believe there is someone there, but I acknowledge that there could be, thus I prepare my mind to respond if there actually is someone there who attacks me.

It's a fine line, but an important one to go as close to the line as possible without crossing over it. Any gap between you and the line of possibilities leaves you vulnerable to some kind of danger - however rare that might be. Crossing over the line of paranoia, places you in constant stress and fear, which is another way to tell if you are on the wrong side of the line. I am always relaxed and calm when I imagine what could occur, and try to remain that way if anything does actually happen.

CM D.J. Eisenhart

 

[morph4me]

I'm just not sure that, if I were talking with a client who pulled a knife, that I would handle it the way I wanted to. Cuz I'm not wearin' my pj's & am well stretched.

You have experience going hard and fast, so you're familiar with the adreneline rush and you have the muscle memory, you're already aware, the rest will basically take care of itself. In situitations like that, you will react the way you train.

 

[MJS]

I've been training for nearly 25 years & have no trouble going at it hard on the mat or in the ring. I'm very proud that in that time, I've never needed to use my physical skils outside of the gym. In college (no thanks to "RoadHouse") I did spend way to much time trying to "protect" friends in need. (It took me a while to realize they brought trouble on themselves). At 39, I have neither the time or energy to ever play the "tough guy." I tell you this only to share my background.

I had a conversation yesterday with some co-workers at a conference. I work as a case manager with homeless folks. The subject of security came up. The place I work now is the only place I've worked (in 8 years of this work) that has security staff. For me, it's never been a thought, honestly. One gal told of co-workers being stabbed by clients in the past & the need for others to be aware that it can happen & protect one'sself against such things.

It got me thinking whether I tend to compartmentalize my training for a certain time, place & attire. I want to be able to protect myself and/or coworkers, if needed. Being aware & ready for something to happen is one thing. Being paranoid is another.

Does anyone else struggle with this trying to find this balance?

I wouldn't say that you're being paranoid, but given the unpredictable nature of the people you're dealing with, its good to be on a heightened awareness. Not sure what you wear to work, but if you havent already, it may be a good idea to workout in those clothes. I'd limit myself to the best techniques that you'd need, while wearing the clothes that you wear to work.

Training wise, I'd imagine the facility you work in has a policy in place of what you can/can't do. During training, it may be best to work on restraining techniques rather than something that may require you to break someones arm. That shouldn't necessarily be thrown out, but saved as a last resort. I'd work on that element of surprise also. Do some role-playing scenarios in your training. Have your workout partner play the role of a client. Have them suddenly rush you, take a swing at you, kick you, and even try to stab you.

Mike

 

[Grenadier]

At 39, I have neither the time or energy to ever play the "tough guy." I tell you this only to share my background.

Being aware & ready for something to happen is one thing. Being paranoid is another.

As long as you aren't jumping at every small detail, that's called wisdom.