Am I caring about others too much?

Discussion in 'Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu' started by onpoint123, May 1, 2019.

  1. onpoint123

    onpoint123 White Belt

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    So I've started training BJJ 7-8 Weeks ago, so you'd call me the new guy right? That's what I thought.
    However, I've been left stumped recently with my training and how well its going; let me give context.
    - I'm the only White Belt with no stripes.
    - I have previous experience in Karate and Kickboxing both on a national and international level.
    - I've coached for a few years in Karate before moving into BJJ.
    - I'm 22, 80kg and in decent shape.
    So the problem that I'm having is that I'm dominating my gym/level, which sounds strange, I know. I'm rolling with mostly white and blue belts; the odd purple which I seem to be able to go sub-for-sub with. All the guys at my gym are competing every 2 months or so, and winning more often than not. This is what bothers me.
    They get very frustrated with me, or themselves, but always after they roll with me. I fight very defensively, a counter-attacker if you would. I don't gas easily as I know my way around a mat and the ways to read people and I know when and when not to go all out. These guys go all out on me, and can't land anything and I fear I'm knocking their confidence.
    I've got to the point where I'm almost giving them my arm, neck etc. just so they get some gratification and its starting to beat on me that they're getting hit back each time they roll with me:- a guy this week cancelled his next fight because he couldn't sub me after we rolled for 5 rounds (He kept demanding to roll with me even after coach told him to just chill and roll with another guy. I subbed him 4 times and won by points in the 3rd).
    I've spoke to the coach and he gave me nothing but praise and re-assured me that I'm doing fine with my method and I should keep doing it.

    Am I just being a idiot and they should just get better, or should I change my game up to accommodate my team mates training better? Its really thrashing my head.

    Sorry for the long post, but I had to get it all out in full. Thanks! :)
     
  2. jobo

    jobo Grandmaster

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    eeer, stuff them, it's their problem if they are not good enough, your problem is you need better opponents to push you

    do you think iron Mike used to let his gym buddies take turns at winning
     
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  3. drop bear

    drop bear Sr. Grandmaster

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    Not sure. Seems a strange dynamic. We have had increadably physical guys dominate above their belt level. But to the extent you say just seems wrong.

    You may need to find a more competitive gym.
     
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  4. kempodisciple

    kempodisciple MT Moderator Staff Member

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    Yeah...kickboxing skills shouldnt transfer over that much. You should be able to beat the people with a year experience if you just dominate them phyaically, but the purple belts shouldn't have an issue with you.

    The only things i can think of are: 1. The school is advancing people too easily. 2: you're "defensive" play feels right because you're not getting subbed, and it feels like you're winning or going sub for sub, but your really just biding it out all the time. (Doesnt sound likely from what you said) 3: you're being unreasonably rough for practice so people are just complying with you. The guy who cancelled his fight could be super thickheaded, although id hope the coach would tell you to turn it down a notch, 4: they all just suck (hopefully not if they're winning competitions or matches fairly regularly) 5: something i didnt think of or 6: you're bored and made up a story for fun (doesnt seem like it, but you never know).

    Except that last one, my advice is largely the same. Don't worry about other people's reactions, unless its an issue. If its becoming an issue talk to your coach to see what's wrong. Go to some competitions, and if it seems like they're all getting thrashed, switch schools (probably to whoevers doing the thrashing)
     
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  5. dvcochran

    dvcochran Senior Master

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    This does seem odd. Why don't you see if you can train with some more advanced people at you gym, if nothing else to see where you fall in your gyms skill level? Certainly no harm auditing some other gyms to see if the same thing tracks there as well.
     
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  6. onpoint123

    onpoint123 White Belt

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    This has got a few idea’s in my head, so cheers. I’ll speak to my coach about letting me roll with people higher in the food chain. I must add though, I didn’t go into BJJ blind, I knew fundamentals. But again, thanks
     
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  7. kempodisciple

    kempodisciple MT Moderator Staff Member

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    Sounds smart. Let us know how it goes. And feel free to participate in the forum a bit, always good to get more perspecties :)
     
  8. Buka

    Buka Grandmaster

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    It's free.
     
  9. Headhunter

    Headhunter Senior Master

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    Honestly I'm finding it very hard to believe that your beating blue belts and experienced white belts with just kickboxing and karate. Unless those guys really really really suck
     
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  10. Martial D

    Martial D Senior Master

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    I see two plausible narratives here.

    1) your school sucks/grades way too lightly.

    2) you are some sort of 'ryan hall'esque prodigy at grappling.

    In both scenarios you need a more competitive school.
     
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  11. gpseymour

    gpseymour MT Moderator Staff Member

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    Man, I'd love to have someone like that to train with - either as an instructor or as a student (meaning me in either of those roles). Fitness and general athleticism goes a long way. And if you really learned body mechanics well in your other training (meaning controlling their body, rather than just how to spar with striking), then your training is contributing, too. Most folks in BJJ should understand that. They'll get over their frustration once they get used to the fact that it's you, not them. If I was a purple or brown belt in that school, I'd be trying to get some mat time with you, to see what it is you're doing that's working so well against the blues. That's useful information.

    So, keep playing defensive. When someone does something that works on you, let them know you enjoyed that. Ask the instructor if you can have some more time with the purples - he/she should be aware you're dominating in the group he'd normally have people working in. Also, challenge yourself. Pick your finish before you start sometimes, so you are only working toward an arm bar on this next guy, and it doesn't matter what else he gives you. The next guy, you gotta get RNC on, etc. This will give you more of a challenge and them more of a chance, without you having to actually go easy and give them openings.
     
  12. Headhunter

    Headhunter Senior Master

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    Or 3 he's over exaggerating his abilities. Not saying he is but...well the story is very unique. Even guys like Bj penn got beaten easily when they first started
     
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  13. jobo

    jobo Grandmaster

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    it doesn't seem that implausible that some one who is 22 and 180 lB of bones and muscle and good movement,can easily dominate a beginners class just on a few simple techniques and his superior physical capabilities, it rather depends on where his compatriots are in terms of fitness
     
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  14. PhotonGuy

    PhotonGuy Senior Master

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    I don't know the whole story but from what it sounds like, you might want to try going to a different BJJ school, one that might give you more of a challenge.
     
  15. Brian R. VanCise

    Brian R. VanCise MT Moderator Staff Member

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    Back in the day this would never happen. No athletic guy would come in and dominate blue belts or be even with purple belts. However, we have seen in my opinion an erosion of the quality of the belt levels in recent years in BJJ particularly at the lower levels. This is what happens when more and more BJJ schools grade to blue belt in a quick time period such as a year or year and a half. I have to assume that the school he is going to just sucks or has a lack of quality control.
     
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  16. jobo

    jobo Grandmaster

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    I think that's the modern world; people want instant gratification or at least reward in the short term. Running a school that measures progress in years rather than months is commercially challenging. If they keep getting belts, it matters little if they don't relate to ' quality'. Tell them it's going to take 5 years and they will go someplace else

    Though it may explain the reaction, that someone with mostly just athleticism is dominating them is something of a wake up call, that something not right !
     
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  17. JowGaWolf

    JowGaWolf Grandmaster

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    If you are a teacher, trainer, instructor..etc. then you are doing the right thing to care. If you are a student, then you are caring too much. As a student it's not your job to help your classmates with their confidence.

    Again, this is caring too much. As a student you should be focusing on improving your skill set. You skill growth will suffer if you are doing things like "giving openings." If people are that easy to beat then learn how to use different strategies. If you are a defensive and counter fighter, then switch it up to an offensive fighter counter fighter. For example, I'm a defensive - counter fighter by default, but I can also be offensive and press the fight if I need to. If I go against another defensive fighter, then I can easily turn to offensive strategies to take advantage of my opponent's unwillingness to strike first.

    Based on your coaches comment, I think he's right except for the last part. If you are doing so well that you start "giving opening"s then I would tell you to work on different strategies to broaden your skills, that way you will still be able to grow skill wise.

    If I were to take a guess, I would say that you haven't told your coach that you are giving openings on purpose so that your opponents can take advantages of you. I couldn't see him being ok with that, since that breeds bad habits as a student.

    Focus on your training and building a skill set. Use it as an opportunity to work on some things you are weak in. Experiment and work on valid strategies other than the one you depend on the most. Other than that. Just understand that your team mates should just get better.

    I wouldn't do any of the stuff you are doing unless I was training someone one. If I'm the student then all I care about is my skill growth.
     
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