So, I've been writing this story right...

CuongNhuka

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Here's an excerpt for you. Some changes had to be made (cussing, and font/format issues I cann't figure out) but it's fairly good. (note: equals about four pages on a works doc.)



Vidar had an idea. He looked at the heavy iron weight sitting on the workbench and the length of chain. He picked up the weight and examined it for a minute. Olivia sat watching. Vidar noticed that the weight was irregularly shaped, and in general would not be thrown very well. He looked around for another minute. There was a heavy enough vice, a blowtorch and a hammer. Perfect. Before he started working, He looked at the chain. Too short, too weak. It would rip apart under the load that it would be put under. But, it was an idea.
Vidar worked for a few hours, hammering away at the iron weight. When he was done it was about a foot long, about 5 inches around, and weighed a good 50 lbs. The chain was the next problem.
Vidar sat down after he finished and figured that because of how fast the Skoll could travel, the chain would need to be very long, otherwise, Skoll could simply hit him before Vidar could do much about it. Vidar finally decided that 100 ft would be just barely enough. He had Olivia buy 150 ft. being able to swing that much chain would not be easy. Vidar might need some more muscle then he had. He didn’t have the time or luxury to think about that.
When Olivia got the length of the heaviest chain she could find, Vidar finished his work. He attached the weight to the chain, and made a last minute touch on the weight and chain. And grabbed his Peacemakers.
As always, Vidar prepared himself for a hunt with a little karaoke. He felt that the song Bohemian Rhapsody applied. A classic song that included feelings of entrapment in an illusion, of regret, of death, of self destruction, of wanting to escape, of sorrow for hurting loved ones, of fear, of inquisition, of needing to escape or be let free, of never being let go, of being left to die, that nothing matters. And, of feelings that your life is pointless.

When Vidar felt ready he took his heavy chain with him to where he knew Skoll would be. The Demon Wolf inside him knew that Skoll would be there. Or, was that his human instinct? No matter the source, Vidar knew, just knew that Skoll would be coming. And soon.
The chain was laid out on the ground across the street that Vidar was standing on. His left hand was in a loop of chain, holding onto the single side. His right hand was rapped half way around about a foot and a half up the chain.
Suddenly, Vidar could hear a motorcycle in the distance. It was definetly Skoll’s bike. A monster of a bike, rolling along to death and destruction. Skoll doesn’t know that his bike is riding to his own destruction. Vidar shrugged his shoulders back until they popped. He rolled them out a few times. He adjusted his grip. He was killing time until his prey was closer. No, not his prey. His enemy.
Skoll Knew something was up, he probably saw the lone bystander on the side of the road. His bike slowed down until he almost stopped. Vidar smirked. The demon wolf was happy. This would be a fight worthy of his title, ‘the killer of Gods’
Vidar walked out to the center of the street, the heavy chain dragging slowly behind him. Vidar faced Skoll.
“You are Not who I wanted to see.” Skoll stated
“But, you are who I wanted to see” Vidar replied
“You have changed Fenrir!”
“That is no longer my name. Fenrir is dead, Vidar killed him. Again”
“You lie, Fenrir is still inside You! I know it! I will show you!”
at that a second, smaller bike road up along Skoll’s side. ‘That would be Hati’ Vidar thought to himself. Wait, who’s that?
“Your choice Fenrir, me, or the girl. You choose to get her, and I escape to kill and rape. You choose her, and Hati kills her. You cannot win. Admit who you really are! Admit that you are the demon wolf!”
Fenrir started to sing lowly to himself. The Animal I have become had become his theme song, almost. For some reason, singing it seemed to help him think. Vidar could feel what the Demon Wolf wanted. It wanted to kill Skoll, and help Hati kill the girl. But that was not what Vidar wanted. Not what his human side wanted. His claws gripped the chain tighter. His human conscious didn’t know what to do. It was completely lost. How to save the girl, and still stop (at least) Skoll.
“Come get me Fenrir. If you dare!”
It finally came to Vidar about half way through the song.
“Why don’t you come here, if you’re not afraid?” Skoll hated being called a coward. Vidar started over
“I can't escape this hell
So many times i've tried
But i'm still caged inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one will ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
somebody help me tame this animal”
Vidar wasn’t really singing. More like, shouting the lyrics with a singer’s voice. It got the message across though.

“Call me a coward, you betrayed yourself, that’s the worst coward!”
“So what if you can see the darkest side of me?
No one will ever change this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal I have become
Help me believe it's not the real me
Somebody help me tame this animal
Somebody help me through this nightmare
I can't control myself
Somebody wake me from this nightmare
I can't escape this hell”
Vidar was clearly taunting his enemy. He could almost hear his enemy growling with rage. A great hunter that one. No one wonder he keeps getting caught on camera.
“Well coward, are you coming or not?”
With that final remark, Skoll started his bike, and burned rubber towards Vidar. Vidar instantly drew his handgun, letting go of the chain with his right hand. He aimed in. the blade aligned perfectly with the wedge on his sights. Perfect sight alignment. The sights were perfectly aligned over the target. Perfect sight picture. This should be easy enough. He hoped.
Squeeze.
Bang.
Thud.
Vroom.

Vidar hit his target perfectly, but the bike was still coming towards him, like a possessed man, or some feral animal. Not like He had been aiming for Skoll. He perfectly hit Hati in the shoulder, causing him to drop to the ground in pain.
Vidar had barely enough time to grab the chain, and with all his effort swing it at Skoll. Vidar took a step forward, and began to run to his left. He could see the heavy weight swing towards Skoll’s neck. Somehow, the heavy chain managed to rap perfectly around Skoll’s neck.
Skoll took his hands from his bike and began to pull at the chain. This made it so he began to swerve. Shortly after he passed were Vidar was, the chain went taught. Vidar was ready. He braced himself, and began to pull with all his might on the chain. He pulled the chain so hard he felt that his muscles were going to tear off the bones they were attached to. He could feel his very bones breaking.
Everything was moving in ‘slo-mo’. He could see Skoll begin to lift, slowly at first, off the bike. He could see his legs swing up, and his boots get caught on the handlebars. He saw the bike try to continue forward, even while being pulled up. For an instant he watched the rider less bike do a wheelie down the street until it finally crashed into a million pieces on the ground.
Vidar was losing his strength when Skoll’s body began to fall to the ground. Vidar noticed that he was wearing a helmet. That was unusual. So was the new jacket. Weird…. Skoll was falling predictably, his upper back was going to hit first.

Thud.

There was a horrifying crash as Skoll landed. It would have horrified anyone but the Demon wolf, who only smirked.
Vidar approached the, possibly dead body of Skoll. No, he wasn’t dead. He had too much strength to be dead. Vidar knew it. The Demon knew it.
Vidar looked over the broken and battered body of Skoll. The former thug had grown up a lot. He was no longer a punk ripping off cars. Too bad. He grew up, just in the wrong direction.
Vidar removed the heavy links of chain. He sat down the head of his enemy. His helmet was all ****ed up. It probably took most of the impact that was meant for Skoll’s head. That would explain why to was basically broken in half. Vidar bent down. He felt a strange sense of regret, or morning about what he was seeing. And satisfaction. And relief. He carefully removed the snap on the helmet, then slipped it over the head of the body.
“You are still alive” Vidar knew it as he approached, but this confirmed it. The eyes, those brown eyes rolled over and looked at Vidar. They had the same feelings in them that Vidar had. Morning, satisfaction, and relief.
“You… think… I’m… going…. To…. *Cough cough* … just…. Roll…. Over…. And…. Die…. Like… that?”
“No, no Skoll, I didn’t. You’re too stubborn.”
“are… you… *cough cough* …. Going… to finish…. It… then?”
“Yes”
“Good…. This…. This…. This…. Isn’t…. for me….”
“I know. I know Skoll”.
At that, Skoll closed his eyes. He might have been asleep, dead, or preparing himself for what he knew Vidar was about to do. Vidar stood up.
Vidar pulled out his other peacemaker. Standing over Skoll, he pulled the trigger.
Vidar’s lower body was covered in gray matter, blood, and some pieces of bone. The smell reminded Vidar of the old days. Of Fenrir. The demon got excited. Vidar had to struggle to keep him contained.
Vidar holstered his weapon, brushed off some gore, and reached into his pocket. He pulled out the small note he had written a few days earlier.

“Fenrir is dead. I killed him.

I am Vidar, the enemy of Wolves.

Let me help.

Let me make up for what happened.

Two Demon wolves down.

One to go”

Vidar walked over to were he had laid out the chain and gathered it up. He picked up his Peacemaker. And walked towards were Hati was. It was only a step before Vidar realized that he had escaped. It was only a shoulder wound, so it’s not like Vidar was extremely impressed.
Vidar ran over to were Hati was. He stopped at the pool of blood. Definitely were he was. The girl was gone. There was no real way to tell if she had escaped, or if Hati still had her.
“*!!!!!” Vidar kicked at air in his rage. He thought he might have gotten them both. Only one.
“If she’s with him, may God have mercy on her. Hati wont” Vidar began to think of what all he might do. Hati was pretty ****ed. He might leave her alone, torture her to death, kill her outright, or rape her until he gets bored.
 

terryl965

<center><font size="2"><B>Martial Talk Ultimate<BR
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Yes always carry on, I would love to read the whole thing or when it is done.
 
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CuongNhuka

CuongNhuka

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Yes always carry on, I would love to read the whole thing or when it is done.

It's in production. I'll post an announcement when it's finished. the next step would be getting it published.... I'll need lots of encouragement then.
 

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