Top ten things you'll never hear a woman say

[Gary Crawford]

Top ten things you'll never hear a woman say

10. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me.

9. That girl's wearing the same outfit I am! Cool! I'm gonna go over and talk to her!

8. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again.

7. You're way smarter than my father.

6. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" all the time -- then you won't have to mess with it anymore.

5. I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want'em?

4. Honey, did you leave that skid in the toilet bowl? Good one!

3. My mom's going to take care of the tab -- order another round for you and your friends.

2. While you were in the bathroom? They went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover.

...and the Number One thing you'll never hear a woman say...

Oh no...not the mall again! Why don't we go over to Home Depot instead?

 

[TigerWoman]

Oh, Gary, your're risking that... you know... the subjects, the women, will revolt and overthrow the king.

10. Goes both ways
6. Never, an issue
7. I have actually said.
3. Not an issue
2. Not an issue
1. Go to Home Depot, Menards, Lowes, Fleet Farm more than the mall!!!

TW

 

[Gary Crawford]

Maybe I'm better suited for Court Jester

 

[shesulsa]

here's one:

Nice fart - do it again!

Nah, don't take a shower - I like your natural odors after class - it turns me on.

 

[The Kai]

How about

You sit down I'll cut the grass

 

[Gary Crawford]

I love the way your old favorite shirt looks on you,no need to change just because my parents are coming over!

 

[Tgace]

How about...

Yes dear, your right.
(ducks and runs....)

 

[Gary Crawford]

Tgace,you're braver then me. BTW-they are organising a search for you right now!Better run!!!

 

[Tgace]

I move swift...I move silent....I move deadly. I can run like @#$$!!!

 

[TigerWoman]

Where ARE my cohorts when I need them. Vacationing I suspect. I guess you are safe for now, we are distracted.... TW

 

[Rob Broad]

here's one:


Nah, don't take a shower - I like your natural odors after class - it turns me on.

I had a strange acquaintence that kind of liked that smell. But I knew she was wierd.

 

[Rob Broad]

How about.

You don't need to pull over and get directions, whenever we arrive will be fine.

 

[MA-Caver]

What about: Sure you can bring the guys over for an all night poker-game and pizza and they can smoke their cigars and fart all night too. Oh and here are those pornos that you wanted to watch.

 

[bignick]

how about this one?

"......................................................................"

silence is golden

 

[bignick]

p.s. Tgace...got any good hiding places?

 

[Gary Crawford]

Your mothers will cry when they find out what TW will do to you when she catches you!

 

[hardheadjarhead]

Here is one:

"If you stop and ask for directions, I'll be embarrassed beyond belief."



Regards,


Steve

 

[bignick]

Your mothers will cry when they find out what TW will do to you when she catches you!

i feel safe right now...strength in numbers and all...i think TW is still looking for backup...than i'll put my running shoes on

 

[TigerWoman]

Gosh, we are in diminished numbers tonight... Sarah, Fuzzy, Triwahine....

How about...

Sure honey, go on that vacation...all by yourself! maybe I would...

Oh that hurts, let me do it again...

Sure, I would love to have your mother for a month, let me ask her...

Why don't we ask your boss over for dinner and a few of my girlfriends...

TW

 

[shesulsa]

Why don't we invite my sister over and have a threesome?

I don't think seven is enough - have another beer.

MMM Bald is soo sexy.

There's just no way I could ever be as smart as you.

I'll change out the clutch myself - you just keep watching the game.

Here - let me clip your toenails for you.

I'll go do my shopping - you just sit here and watch the pretty girls go by.

I sure wish your mother would teach me how to clean house - she's so much better at it and I just don't have a clue.

Are you kidding? I never fake it!