Top ten things you'll never hear a woman say

G

Gary Crawford

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Top ten things you'll never hear a woman say

10. You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me.

9. That girl's wearing the same outfit I am! Cool! I'm gonna go over and talk to her!

8. I'm so happy with my new hairstyle, I don't think I'll ever change it again.

7. You're way smarter than my father.

6. Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" all the time -- then you won't have to mess with it anymore.

5. I've decided to buy myself a boob job. How big do you want'em?

4. Honey, did you leave that skid in the toilet bowl? Good one!

3. My mom's going to take care of the tab -- order another round for you and your friends.

2. While you were in the bathroom? They went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still cover.

...and the Number One thing you'll never hear a woman say...

Oh no...not the mall again! Why don't we go over to Home Depot instead?
 
Oh, Gary, your're risking that... you know... the subjects, the women, will revolt and overthrow the king.

10. Goes both ways
6. Never, an issue
7. I have actually said.
3. Not an issue
2. Not an issue
1. Go to Home Depot, Menards, Lowes, Fleet Farm more than the mall!!!

TW
 
Maybe I'm better suited for Court Jester
 
here's one:

Nice fart - do it again!

Nah, don't take a shower - I like your natural odors after class - it turns me on.
 
How about

You sit down I'll cut the grass
 
I love the way your old favorite shirt looks on you,no need to change just because my parents are coming over!
 
How about...

Yes dear, your right.
(ducks and runs....)
 
Tgace,you're braver then me. BTW-they are organising a search for you right now!Better run!!!
 
I move swift...I move silent....I move deadly. I can run like @#$$!!! :)
 
Where ARE my cohorts when I need them. Vacationing I suspect. I guess you are safe for now, we are distracted.... TW
 
What about: Sure you can bring the guys over for an all night poker-game and pizza and they can smoke their cigars and fart all night too. Oh and here are those pornos that you wanted to watch.
 
how about this one?

"......................................................................"

silence is golden
 
Your mothers will cry when they find out what TW will do to you when she catches you!
 
Gary Crawford said:
Your mothers will cry when they find out what TW will do to you when she catches you!
Click to expand...
i feel safe right now...strength in numbers and all...i think TW is still looking for backup...than i'll put my running shoes on
 
Gosh, we are in diminished numbers tonight... Sarah, Fuzzy, Triwahine....

How about...

Sure honey, go on that vacation...all by yourself! maybe I would...

Oh that hurts, let me do it again...

Sure, I would love to have your mother for a month, let me ask her...

Why don't we ask your boss over for dinner and a few of my girlfriends...

TW
 
Why don't we invite my sister over and have a threesome?

I don't think seven is enough - have another beer.

MMM Bald is soo sexy.

There's just no way I could ever be as smart as you.

I'll change out the clutch myself - you just keep watching the game.

Here - let me clip your toenails for you.

I'll go do my shopping - you just sit here and watch the pretty girls go by.

I sure wish your mother would teach me how to clean house - she's so much better at it and I just don't have a clue.

Are you kidding? I never fake it!
 
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