What is the most important part of self defense?

[Gwai Lo Dan]

In high school, before I started martial arts, I liked reading Black Belt magazine. Having zero martial arts experiences, I had to laugh when guys would write letters like, "I studied x-do for 3 years, got my black belt, and when I got in a fight, I just froze, not knowing what to do".

That always stuck in my mind, If you are in a fight....FIGHT!.

 

[ralphmcpherson]

That's a story I'd like to hear - please give the long version!

Its a funny story actually (only funny because it ended well ). I run about 30 or 40 kms a week and I always run with my german shepherd who is a big male and very protective of myself, my wife and my kids. When I map a run I always have to factor in a drink break at some point of the run for my dog becase they dehydrate very easily on long runs in the heat. Anyway, on this particular afternoon I was on a particularly long run and was passing through an area I wouldnt usually frequent (not because its a bad area, I just dont normally go that way). I saw a toilet block at the back of a park and stopped off in there to let my dog get a drink. My dog knows to just wander into a cubicle and drink from the basin (the tap is motion activated so he sticks his head there and the tap comes on). This left me standing alone in the entrance waiting for him. Suddenly, from out of nowhere a very dodgy looking guy appeared who asked if I was alone (which sent alarm bells ringing). He was talking to me and pressing forward and checking out my shoes and ipod and was basically backing me into a corner. It certainly didnt take great awareness to realise this guy was going to try something any second. Anyway, my dog cruised out of the cubicle and was uncomfortable with the situation (my dog wont let anyone stand toe to toe with me, he will always stand between me and another person, he actually barked heatedly at a mate once while we were doing sd in my backyard, and he knows and loves that particular friend of mine). My dog pushed his way between me and the other guy and just stared at him. The guy then said "gee he's a big boy isnt he, is he yours?", I said "yeah he's mine", and he replied "he doesnt look happy, I wouldnt want him messing with me", to which I replied "believe me, you dont want that to happen". The guy then looked panicked and instantly backed off and left the block saying nothing. I have no doubt that had my dog not been there it would not have ended that well, he could have had a knife for all I knew.

 

[WC_lun]

Do not be too hard on those who freeze when confronted by a self defense situation. Everyone reacts differently when it comes to the stress and adrenaline dump of a real self defense situation and no one who has not been there will know how they will react until it happens. Good training must mimic as close as we safely can to real situations, but it is never the real thing. I have seen a shy, retiring, middle school teacher with only a moderate amount of training turn into a freaking beast when he was threatened. On the flip side, I have seen a confident, powerful, respected, successful kick boxer melt when confronted by violence. Most people are in between. Giving the advice to fight when it is time to fight isn't really helpful and does not take into account the myriad of different variables. There are some people who will just freeze when confronted with violence. It isn't that they are cowards, it is just how thier body and mind react to the stimilus of violence. Good training helps, but everyone is different.

 

[Gwai Lo Dan]

There are some people who will just freeze when confronted with violence. It isn't that they are cowards, it is just how thier body and mind react to the stimilus of violence.

Agreed. I am just saying to keep in mind that people DO freeze, and tell yourself to keep going and NOT freeze if you find yourself in the situation. Any defense is better than no defense whatsoever.

 

[Dwi Chugi]

The best self-defense is to have no enimies.

But all the answers above are great if you are attacked.

 

[sfs982000]

I have to agree that situational awareness and not putting yourself in situations or locations where trouble can get started is probably the most important part of self defense, but then again situations can happen anytime anywhere so being able to react calmly and confidently is also important.

 

[sopraisso]

Agreed. I am just saying to keep in mind that people DO freeze, and tell yourself to keep going and NOT freeze if you find yourself in the situation. Any defense is better than no defense whatsoever.

But sometimes a defense doesn't need to be physical. Instead of starting to fight, someone can try to de-escalate the situation into a non-agression point, or even -- if the agression has already started -- let the agression stop instead of increasing it. I can imagine situations where it is better to freeze than to start fighting. Suppose you're at a bar and an aggressive person, for some reason, punches or slaps you in the face. In this situation, sometimes it could be better not to react -- even if you can pretty much "defeat" the attacker --, because the agressor could have accomplices that would make things much worse behind your back. Not to mention the legal annoyances after it. In the other hand, maybe if you let it go (even after having been "beaten"), things won't get any worse.

I don't mean we should never physically defend ourselves under any situations. There are times when it could happen. But in most people's case it's just very unlikely. Just to make my point a little clearer (and drop my two cents without much effort), I'd like to paste here part of a response I gave in a related thread:

[...] where I live it's almost impossible I go into a real fight. Why? First, because I don't work in an environment where it could happen more often (like being a LEO or a bouncer). Second, because if someone attacked me, there would be 0,1% chance my best option would be fighting back.
Why would ever someone attack me? Where I live, there's almost one only reason: to rob me. But where I live a robber would never attack me without circumstances that would put him in great advantage like: 1) the assailant has a gun; 2) he's got me alone against him and his partners (even so, rarely they would be unarmed); 3) there's a fragile and beloved one with me, like my wife or my daugther. Why would I ever, in such situations, choose to risk my life and/or other people's lives instead of only giving my money and going back home safely, after it's over? It's a very complicated choice, and there are many variables involved.

So I do believe fighting is an option, but it's the last option. Seriously, if you live in a hard environment, maybe you should buy a gun (anyway, you have to understand fully the responsibility of having one). Furthermore, self defense begins much sooner. Start watching out for your back when going on the streets. Avoid going out alone and walking around dangerous places (it many times depends on what time it is). Beware of the surroundings, trying to detect people with bad intentions. Try to walk in a way you don't look like a convenient target. Remember women and children are the favorite targets of assailants, so you have to take particular care with your loved ones. A person concerned with self defense maybe should try to learn to have how to talk to an agressor, how to avoid a fight with using words (example: not to stimulate or increase an agressive response from another person). One more thing: we have to remember that an agressor could be much more prepared to deal with stress over violent situations than a martial artist, once the first can already be used to deal with alike situations, while the later is used to train in a safe, controled area.

We have to remember that martial arts were created in a reality totally different of ours today, and in that time it was immediately meant to be used as self defense -- and they were more useful, because there weren't or there were not so many fire guns like today.

Adding to that quote, I've recently read that when karate was developed in Okinawa all kinds of weapons were forbidden. So it makes a lot of difference when thinking about using karate in that context or in a totally diferent one. I believe the same applies to any martial art designed in the past and in different places as a means of self-defense. Things can get even worse once today martial arts are just not "tested" and "proved" as often as they used to do in the past. Not to mention we hardly understand the praticallity of martial arts the way they used to do. Even martial arts recently created and aimed towards realistic self-defense have this same issue of not being tested very often.

However, different environments/contexts ask for different tactics regarding to self defense. A physical fight can be the same today and in the old days of China/Okinawa/Japan/Korea/Phillipines or wherever, but an agression/self defense situation today and where we live is definitely different from what it was when and where most currently practised martial arts were developed.

 

[Instructor]

its a funny story actually (only funny because it ended well ). I run about 30 or 40 kms a week and i always run with my german shepherd who is a big male and very protective of myself, my wife and my kids. When i map a run i always have to factor in a drink break at some point of the run for my dog becase they dehydrate very easily on long runs in the heat. Anyway, on this particular afternoon i was on a particularly long run and was passing through an area i wouldnt usually frequent (not because its a bad area, i just dont normally go that way). I saw a toilet block at the back of a park and stopped off in there to let my dog get a drink. My dog knows to just wander into a cubicle and drink from the basin (the tap is motion activated so he sticks his head there and the tap comes on). This left me standing alone in the entrance waiting for him. Suddenly, from out of nowhere a very dodgy looking guy appeared who asked if i was alone (which sent alarm bells ringing). He was talking to me and pressing forward and checking out my shoes and ipod and was basically backing me into a corner. It certainly didnt take great awareness to realise this guy was going to try something any second. Anyway, my dog cruised out of the cubicle and was uncomfortable with the situation (my dog wont let anyone stand toe to toe with me, he will always stand between me and another person, he actually barked heatedly at a mate once while we were doing sd in my backyard, and he knows and loves that particular friend of mine). My dog pushed his way between me and the other guy and just stared at him. The guy then said "gee he's a big boy isnt he, is he yours?", i said "yeah he's mine", and he replied "he doesnt look happy, i wouldnt want him messing with me", to which i replied "believe me, you dont want that to happen". The guy then looked panicked and instantly backed off and left the block saying nothing. I have no doubt that had my dog not been there it would not have ended that well, he could have had a knife for all i knew.

good dog!!!!!!!

 

[Instructor]

The best self defense is not putting yourself in a situation to need self defense.

 

[Gwai Lo Dan]

Suddenly, from out of nowhere a very dodgy looking guy appeared who asked if I was alone (which sent alarm bells ringing).

I always thought this clip was interesting. When thugs say something to Clint Eastwood, Clint doesn't really answer; he just says his own thing. It seems that answering someone's comments can be construed as weakness, in that you are then having HIS conversation, not your conversation.
(I can't seem to get the clip to show -

)

 

[WC_lun]

Using a movie script to extrapolate on the interactions between predators and possible prey is not very realistic. In my old nieghborhood, if an old man acted like this toward a few bangers, one of two likely results would happen. They would laugh at him for being crazy or they'd beat the hell out of him or shoot him for "dissing" them. Real life is not a movie.

 

[Aiki Lee]

True, but you also do not want to be stuck in thinking brain by having a conversation with someone who might attack you. Don't ignore them, but don't get into a discussion either. Stick to your statements of "leave me alone" or "What do you want?" to prevent yourself from being set up by attackers. If you are caught in "thinking brain" you will not be able to act very quickly.

That said the most important skill for SD I think are de-escalation and ukemi.

 

[msmitht]

Quick reaction and practical moves. Improvisation is a must.