skribs
Grandmaster
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Timmy was on the bus on the way to his first day of school. He heard some of the older kids on the bus whispering swear words to each other and giggling, as kids of that age often do. He'd heard most of the words before, but there was one he hadn't: "purple flower". So when Timmy got to his class, he goes up to the teacher and asks, "Mrs. Johnson, what does Purple Flower mean?"
Mrs. Johnson gasped in horror and clasped her hands up to her mouth. When she regained enough composure to speak, she shrieked "I cannot believe you would use that kind of language in my classroom! Go to the principle's office right now!"
Timmy grudgingly complied and headed down to the principle's office. The principle was very busy, as it was the first day of school, so Timmy had to wait for a while. When the principle got back into his office, he says, "it's the first day of school, why are you in my office already?"
Timmy, who's face was red from crying, said "I don't know! I just asked Mrs. Johnson what Purple Flower means, and-"
"Language like that is not tolerated at this school!" The principle yelled, interrupting young Timmy. "You're expelled! I'm going to call your mother and tell you to pick you up and find you a new school."
Timmy had to wait once again for his mother to come pick him up. She yelled at him all the way home. "First day of school...how could you do this to me..." She even drove slow so she could get more yelling in. When they got home, she calmed herself down enough to ask his side of the story. "Okay, hon, what happened today?"
"I asked Mrs. Johnson what a word meant, and she sent me to the principle's office, and he sent me home, and I still don't know what 'purple flower' means!" Timmy explained.
At the word "purple flower" his Mom's eyes grew wide. "You're grounded!" she yelled. "Go to your room. You get no dinner tonight, and your Dad is going to hear about this."
Luckily for Timmy, his Dad was able to vent at work, and was calm by the time he got home. He went into his son's room and said, "I heard you had a rough day. Want to tell me what happened?"
Timmy had figured out by now that the word "purple flower" would get him in trouble, so he said, "I just heard a word on the bus and I didn't know what it meant. So I asked Mrs. Johnson, and instead of telling me she sent me to the principle's office, and he sent me home, and Mom sent me to my room!"
Timmy's Dad said, "well, that sounds innocent enough. You're supposed to ask questions at school. So tell me, what was the word?"
Timmy had no choice now but to say, "purple flower."
His Dad didn't yell or scream. He simply said as calmly as he could, "I will not tolerate this in my house. Get out." So here Timmy is, 6 years old, and he's kicked out of his house. He started begging for money on the streets, and quickly earned enough money to start paying for private school. He worked hard in school and earned a scholarship to college, and as an adult quickly worked his way up through the corporate ladder to vice president. He even got married to his high school sweetheart and had a few kids. Life was going good for Tim.
One day the local news station was having a slow day, and Tim's net worth had just hit ten million dollars, so they decided to interview him. "Ivy league education, beautiful wife and kids, and enough money to do whatever you want," the reporter summed up. "Have you always had it this easy, Tim?"
Tim chuckled. "No, actually I was expelled on my first day of school and kicked out of my house over a horrible misunderstanding. I can laugh about it now, but that was the worst day of my life. I guess I should be thankful for that day, though, because I learned to work hard and take care of myself real quick after that. The funny thing is, I still don't know what 'purple flower' means." He regretted saying the words as soon as they were out of his mouth. He had said "purple flower" on TV. The news report spread like a wildfire on Youtube, garnering more hits than a funny cat video. His company fired him. His wife kicked him out of the house, divorced him, and took everything he owned. His riches, his job, and his family were all gone in a matter of days.
A month after the news incident, Tim is sitting on a park bench next to another bum. Tim asks him, "why are you homeless?"
"Drugs," was the simple answer. "What about you?"
Tim sighed before telling his tale. "I'm haunted by my first day of school. I got expelled just for asking a question, and then my parents kicked me out."
"That's rough," the bum said.
"Well, I actually made it work," Tim continued. "I worked hard, got through school and got a great job and had a great family. Then I threw it all away again, for the same stupid misunderstanding. And the worst part is, this word has ruined my life, and I still don't know what 'purple flower' means!"
When Tim said the word "purple flower", the bum gasped in horror and ran across the street, got hit by a car and died.
The moral of the story: look both ways before you cross the street.
Mrs. Johnson gasped in horror and clasped her hands up to her mouth. When she regained enough composure to speak, she shrieked "I cannot believe you would use that kind of language in my classroom! Go to the principle's office right now!"
Timmy grudgingly complied and headed down to the principle's office. The principle was very busy, as it was the first day of school, so Timmy had to wait for a while. When the principle got back into his office, he says, "it's the first day of school, why are you in my office already?"
Timmy, who's face was red from crying, said "I don't know! I just asked Mrs. Johnson what Purple Flower means, and-"
"Language like that is not tolerated at this school!" The principle yelled, interrupting young Timmy. "You're expelled! I'm going to call your mother and tell you to pick you up and find you a new school."
Timmy had to wait once again for his mother to come pick him up. She yelled at him all the way home. "First day of school...how could you do this to me..." She even drove slow so she could get more yelling in. When they got home, she calmed herself down enough to ask his side of the story. "Okay, hon, what happened today?"
"I asked Mrs. Johnson what a word meant, and she sent me to the principle's office, and he sent me home, and I still don't know what 'purple flower' means!" Timmy explained.
At the word "purple flower" his Mom's eyes grew wide. "You're grounded!" she yelled. "Go to your room. You get no dinner tonight, and your Dad is going to hear about this."
Luckily for Timmy, his Dad was able to vent at work, and was calm by the time he got home. He went into his son's room and said, "I heard you had a rough day. Want to tell me what happened?"
Timmy had figured out by now that the word "purple flower" would get him in trouble, so he said, "I just heard a word on the bus and I didn't know what it meant. So I asked Mrs. Johnson, and instead of telling me she sent me to the principle's office, and he sent me home, and Mom sent me to my room!"
Timmy's Dad said, "well, that sounds innocent enough. You're supposed to ask questions at school. So tell me, what was the word?"
Timmy had no choice now but to say, "purple flower."
His Dad didn't yell or scream. He simply said as calmly as he could, "I will not tolerate this in my house. Get out." So here Timmy is, 6 years old, and he's kicked out of his house. He started begging for money on the streets, and quickly earned enough money to start paying for private school. He worked hard in school and earned a scholarship to college, and as an adult quickly worked his way up through the corporate ladder to vice president. He even got married to his high school sweetheart and had a few kids. Life was going good for Tim.
One day the local news station was having a slow day, and Tim's net worth had just hit ten million dollars, so they decided to interview him. "Ivy league education, beautiful wife and kids, and enough money to do whatever you want," the reporter summed up. "Have you always had it this easy, Tim?"
Tim chuckled. "No, actually I was expelled on my first day of school and kicked out of my house over a horrible misunderstanding. I can laugh about it now, but that was the worst day of my life. I guess I should be thankful for that day, though, because I learned to work hard and take care of myself real quick after that. The funny thing is, I still don't know what 'purple flower' means." He regretted saying the words as soon as they were out of his mouth. He had said "purple flower" on TV. The news report spread like a wildfire on Youtube, garnering more hits than a funny cat video. His company fired him. His wife kicked him out of the house, divorced him, and took everything he owned. His riches, his job, and his family were all gone in a matter of days.
A month after the news incident, Tim is sitting on a park bench next to another bum. Tim asks him, "why are you homeless?"
"Drugs," was the simple answer. "What about you?"
Tim sighed before telling his tale. "I'm haunted by my first day of school. I got expelled just for asking a question, and then my parents kicked me out."
"That's rough," the bum said.
"Well, I actually made it work," Tim continued. "I worked hard, got through school and got a great job and had a great family. Then I threw it all away again, for the same stupid misunderstanding. And the worst part is, this word has ruined my life, and I still don't know what 'purple flower' means!"
When Tim said the word "purple flower", the bum gasped in horror and ran across the street, got hit by a car and died.
The moral of the story: look both ways before you cross the street.
