Discussion in 'The Locker Room Bar & Grill' started by rdonovan1, Feb 4, 2010.
So we have this:
And we have this:
Sir, I dub thee troll ... or ... manic.
Both the martial arts and the dating, mating and relating fields deal with people. If you don't understand people and how they think, act, feel, and believe then you how are you going to be successful at either one.
Both also require that you have a good knowledge of things like body language and that you are confident enough in yourself to believe that you can accomplish anything you put your mind to.
Stop and ask yourself as to how many Black Belts would have gotten to be Black Belts if they had just simply given up after the first time that they tried something new. Chances are none of them would have made it to Black Belt. You can't accomplish something new if you are afraid to try something new.
The body language aspect is also very important because when you are standing face to face against an opponent who wants to basically kick your *** just because he thinks he can. If you can't read his body language and predict what he might do then you are going to have no way of blocking his kick or punch.
It's also important to believe that you can carry out that kick or punch and that you know how to do so. Sitting around talkling about how you can kick someone's *** just because you might have seen it on tv doesn't mean that you can do so in a real fight out on the street where it really counts.
People may not like it at all, but the simple fact is that gangbangers like The Bloods, Crips, GKB gang, and even the Hell's Angels are out there and they really don't care about you. When they look at you they figure that you are nothing but a bug to be crushed and that is why you can't be displaying fear to them. You need to know that you can not only handle any attack that they might throw at you, but also to be able to have the courage and gumption to stand up to them and to be willing to defend yourself if need be with deadly force.
Whether we like it or not out on the street the mentality is kill or be killed. Some people are and will just simply be misguided and will not really pose much of a threat to you. In those situations you can and you should try to de-escalate the situation using things like influence, persuasion and other conflict management skills up to and including humor as those people generally are not really much of a threat to you.
You also need to know how and when to use deadly force if need be against someone that might be armed and intent on killing you. If you don't know that then you have no way of really defending yourself when it truly matters. Everything is based upon the intent of the attacker and the type of attack. Simple common sense says that you are not going to shoot someone just because they call you a name that you might not like. Doing so would make you guilty of murder in the eyes of the law and you would be tried and convicted of murder.
If however someone were to break into your house while you are home and threating you or your family or if they were to use something like a gun or a knife then you would be justified legally in using deadly force depending on where you are at and what the local laws say.
In most states you have the legal right to defend yourself and to even kill someone if someone enters your home and causes you to fear for your life. That is called the Castle Doctrine under the law and in most cases you would be aquitted of any and all charges of murder.
Some places like the L.A. area are not so kind to you. I once had a friend who lived in the L.A. area that told me about a case in which a burger broke into someone's house in that area while the people were home. The owners of the house shot and killed the burgler, but were arrested and charged with pre-meditated murder and they were sued by the burglers family.
That is just an example of how crazy some of the laws can be. We also have a little thing that the Constitution of the United States of America and the Bill of Rights in which you have the legal right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. You are also supposed to be innocent until proven guilty in a court of law and you are supposed to have the right to remain silent.
You are also guaranteed the right to free speech as well. This is all stuff that every American has been given by the founders of the United States of America and by lawmakers since then and even though there have been cases challenging it in court nine time out of ten those cases have been ruled unconstitutional by the Supreme Court. There have also been laws that Congress has passed that the Supreme Court has declared unconstitional.
I don't know if anyone has ever really taken the time to look at the types of laws that they come out with, but some of them can be relatively downright stupid. One example of this is a law that pertains to the State of Minnesota. It's an old law, but one that is still on the books and is generally unenforceable. The law basically says that it is unlawful for someone to cross the border from Minnesota into Wisconsin with a chicken on their head.
There are other laws like that which are just as stupid in other states. I however am not going to go chasing down those laws for people. That is something that yoiu will have to find on your one time using something like google.
I'm studying this because of a number of legal issues that I have encountered and because my father is an attorney and more than often I end up talking the law with him than anything else.
I've tried to get him to understand as to how the martial arts has effected me and as to how I have gotten into it and even as to how it relates to the whole dating, mating, and relating thing but unfortunately he like most peopel will not listen because he thinks that he knows everything and can't admit the truth to either himself or to others.
I see. So as long as martial arts remain legal... I can has women?
Women factor into the picture. because they tend to expect you to protect them and to be the man.
I don't know about you, but I don't know of too many women that find a coward and a wus attractive at all. Most women tend to feel that is a turn off and that is why it's important for people to learn to think positive and to be willing to stand their ground.
It doesn't mean that you have to be a jerk about it. It does mean though that they do expect you to be a man and to be a gentleman. Being a gentleman doesn't mean that you have to be gentle. It just means that you have to be smart enough to be the man in the relationship.
The martial arts is in my opinion an important aspect of that as it requires you to think on your feet and to always be aware of your surroundings. That's something that everyone that really knows the martial arts is taught. Awarenes of your surroundings is the first key of self defense and it is a legal requirement as well.
Under the law if you study the martial arts you are considered a lethal weapon and as such you are required by law to always be in control of the situation. If you use too much force then the law can say that you used excessive force and if you use too little force then your opponent can and will take advantage of that.
Everything in the martial arts, in life and with the law is about balance and about knowing both yourself and your opponent. If you are out of balance or if you don't really know either yourself or your opponent then you are sure to lose the fight. That principle has been discussed time and time again by people like Sun Tzu and Miyamoto Mushashi.
One of the things that you have to stop and think about with the dating scene is as to whether or not the girl that you might be talking to has a boyfriend or a husband. Sometimes they will tell you that they do just to throw you off and sometimes they won't and in some situations you may end up coming across and meeting either a jealous boyfriend or husband that believes that you are trying to do something that you shouldn't and sometimes they may even just simply like to fight and may choose to pick a fight with you just to prove themselves. That kind of stuff can and does happen without warning and it is something to be aware of.
There's also going to be times where the girl herself may be playing games with you for one reason or another. Sometimes she may be scammer, sometimes she is a player, and sometimes she is either taking drugs or just plain crazy. I've come across all of it before at one time or another and I still do to this day. I am however trying to stay away from the scammers, the drug adicts, and the crazies by as much as possible. The players I don't mind too much as that is just part of the game and that's why you need to keep your wits about you and it's also why you need to pay attention to the law as well because if you don't then you can get in trouble with the law big time and that is something that most people that I know of don't want as that can be one giant nightmare, especially in today's litigious society where you can be sued for just about any reason.
Through my own studies of the law I have learned that more and more the law is awarding large sums of money over the stupidest things. One case involved an 80 year old woman who was awarded over $1 million dollars because she spilled hot coffee on herself while at a McDonalds. The company knew that the coffee was 20 degrees hotter than most other places and did nothing to correct the issue and even though it was really her fault she won the lawsuit against the company under a claim of negligence on the part of the restaurant.
Another case that I read about involved a group of Mexicans that crossed the border into the United States illegally. Several of their party died in the desert because they did not bring enough water with them. As a result they turned around and sued the United States Government for a lot of money and won because according to them the government should have known about this ahead of time and should have installed drinking fountains in the desert for them to use.
I personally that is stupid and that it is the fault of the Mexicans as they should have known that it was the desert. That's just simple common sense. Most normal people know that the desert is hot and that there is no water out there and that you should take precautions to protect yourself from the elements. If you don't then that is basically your own fault for what happens as nature is not and will not care. Lack of simple common sense in some place like that is just not a valid defense against mother nature and whether we like it or not she can be pretty nasty when she wants to be as it's her world and her law that we all must abide by first and foremost.
People that fail to remember that can and will be exterminated by mother nature herself and whether we like it or not there is nothing that we can say or do about it as her law is final.
It's too bad that a lot of people just have not figured that out as of yet. I personally think that it's even funnier when so called martial artists haven't figured it out because it is part of just about every martial art that there is. It's especially true of the asian martial arts.
I think you really should stay away from the crazies! The more you associate with them the crazier you become!! :erg:
Great point. We're all tryhards and wannabees!
True! We all have our hands registered. How about you? BTW can you jog my memory? I'm not sure I've actually seen that legislation. I must remind my white belts how lethal they have become!
Applies to the mind as well! Don't forget to keep taking the tablets.
Sound advice. They probably read Nostradamus' predictions that said it was likely to happen about this time. BTW. How are your chickens? No swine flu in the flock I hope.
You father is a wise man! It's a pity you have not been more attentive grasshopper.
In the past 24 hours I have read more crap than in the past four months total. We hang around this forum to discuss MA and if we don't have something to say we don't spurt drivell!
You have had 21 posts in the past 24 hours and not one has anything to do with martial arts. :asian:
rdonvan ... how old are you?
It's got everything to do with the martial arts because the martial arts is supposed to be all about things like strength, courage, and the wisdom of knowing when to fight and when not to fight.
I don't know what things were like for you when you were growing up, but for me I had no choice but to turn to the martial arts for guidance and support because my father was never around for me and because I was always picked on by other kids and I am not the only one that has experienced stuff like that as Chuck Norris mention that in one of his books about his life.
I've tried to run and hide from myself for a long time and I've tried to believe that I could out run and hide from it all, but that is just not very realistic at all.
Because of the legal issue that I am currently dealing with and because of everything else that I have either studied or come in contact with I've been forced to deal with the concept of conflict resolution and self defense.
This forum is supposed to be about that very topic. Unfortunately for some reason a lot of the people that I have so far encountered and talked to far seem to have other ideas about that. What good is the martial arts if you are afraid to stand up for yourself and to defend what you believe to be right and morally just.
It also does no good to study any martial art if you are consumed by fear. It's one thing to teach people to defend themselves, but at what price does that involve. So what if you have a good spinning back kick. It's not going to make a bit of difference out on the street if you can't apply it.
I'm talking about the real world here. Not some made up fantasy stuff.
If you don't have the proper mindset and attitude then no amount of physical training is going to do you any good.
Just a suggestion, but the first couple of lessons that you should teach your students is how to think positive, be confident, believe in themselves and awareness. If you are not teaching them those basic skillsets then you are failing them as a teacher because none of what they learn from you is going to do them any good if they don't have those things down.
They should be learning the most basic lessons about what the martial arts is really all about before they even learn to punch or kick because if they don't have the proper attitude and mindset then they will either lose the fight or they will end up being bullies. The martial arts is supposed to be about self defense. It's not about who's right or wrong or who's better.
They also need to learn how to focus and to pay attention to both the big picture and the details. If they are not learning that then they are not progressing and really earning the belts that are receiving.
Unfortunately the martial arts community as a whole has become very commercialized and has lost focus of what the martial arts is truly all about. No days it's common to hear martial arts students say that their teacher can beat up so and so's teacher. Who really cares about who's teacher can beat up whose teacher. That is not the martial arts as it was originally intended. It was originally intended to protect life and limb not to go around acting like you are the villian from the Karate Kid movies.
Mr. Miyagi was right in the movie 'The Karate Kid' that it does not matter what belt you have and it does not matter how big you are as a belt is only meant to hold up the pants and out on the street a belt is not going to make one bit of difference to someone who is intent on killing you. It's not what's around your waist that matters the most it's what you know and as to what your intent is.
If the teacher is out of balance, then so shall the students. It's that simple.
I can guarantee that if you were to hang around some of the people that I have met they are not and will not care about what you have around your waist or even as to who your teacher was. To them that makes no difference at all because they really could care less about that.
Because of those people I have learned to not care about what belt you have or who your teacher is. The only thing that I care about is as to whether a certain tactic or technique really works out on the street in the real world against people whose only goal and purpose is to separate your head from your neck using any tactic or technique that they can and some of the people that I have met have been or are in things where it really does matter like law enforcement or the special forces. I've also met gangbangers who really could care less about whether you know this or that or who your teach was as many of them can and do carry guns and have heavy duty connections with professional gangsters, mercenaries, and any other sort of trash that you can think of.
It's especially obvious in third world countries like Mexico and Nigeria where the government and the drug cartels rule. I don't know if you've ever seen any of them before, but I have and I know for a fact that they are not going to care about whether you just won some tournament somewhere. That means nothing to these types of people because they are thinking only about themselves and they are running on things like pure adrenaline, drugs, and or instinct.
It's the age old survival of the fittest concept. People may not like it, but it is a jungle out there and it really does no good to hide from it because it can and will catch up to you at some point. That's why you have to have a better and stronger mindset than they do. If you don't you will lose for sure.
Fair question. I'm 40 years old and I have seen and experienced quite a lot. What I have not experienced I have studied.
When you bring experience and education together then you have true wisdom and that is something that all of the martial arts masters have been aware of for centuries.
When it comes to things like the martial arts, business and the law I tend to have the mindset of a Marine. When it comes to things like love and having fun I am usually a lot more relaxed, but still guarded because I have been burned before on a number of occasions and because of that and what I have studied I have learned to take things with a grain of salt because you can never really be sure as to who are really dealing with unless you really know them and even then people can change at the drop of a hat.
It's good to be optimistic about things, but it is not good to be so optimistic that you are naive about it. It's also not good to be too negative about things as that can and usually does backfire on you. The best approach is with caution and an open mind while at the same time being as positive and upbeat as you can be.
It's also a good idea to constantly challenge yourself and to set new goals for yourself because if you don't then you tend to become stagnant and stale. You won't always have all the answers and you may disagree with people, but if you can't be flexible enough in both your behavior and mindset then you lose before you even begin.
Dude, you spout an awful lot of stuff about idealism but never any truth.
What I see in your posts is a general disregard for other people who've been doing martial arts for a very long time and who have been through some serious ***** and you don't want to listen to their advice.
So, Daniel-san ... I suggest you go find your own Miyagi ... but then when you start questioning him ... I wonder what he'll do ....
I'm gonna say that I don't think you intended this to be a discussion, rather a platform for your manifesto which you have been delivering to us piece by piece.
Your frames of reference are a few classic film stars and some mind-control kooks ... and you're telling US we aren't challenging ourselves?
Look ... I grew up in LA. I've been on the wrong side of a knife, a gun, and the hands of people who were supposed to love me. I'm certified in Reiki, I've earned a black belt and I've seen less ***** than many others here who are giving you good advice.
If you're not finding what you want here, then you need to move on and keep on looking. I'm done wasting time on you.
I'm not talking about some clean room dojo stuff where everyone is given a few techniques to try out and if they don't work then it's ok.
I'm talking about the real world the way it really is. I'm not sugarcoating it to make it more palatable to people because the real world doesn't care about what one person thinks or feels.
The street is a lot different than the dojo. In the dojo and in tournaments there are safeguards and there are certain rules that are supposed to be followed. Out in the real world there are no rules and I think that is something that a lot of people are forgetting.
Like most people I tend to prefer peace and I do respect the rules, but when it comes to the real world and real fights I chuck all of that out the window because it cannot and will not help me at all.
Unlike a tournament there are no referees out in the real world to tell you when to stop and start. That's something that you have to know already because if you don't then your opponent can and will use that against you.
Maybe you and other people don't take real world self defense very seriously, but I do because I have to deal with it every day. Where I live and where I tend to go there usually is no one around to help me with anything. I have to rely on myself to get things done and to deal with all of the things that I see and hear. Sometimes I meet some really nice and honest people, but often times I tend to run across people that really don't care about anyone other than themselves and for that reason I have learned to be hard and to not take their crap at all.
Maybe you might have different ideas than I do, but when I am out and about and when I am dealing with people that I don't know and trust my mind is thinking about what I am going to do if someone like a gangbanger comes up to me with a knife or a gun.
I try to be nice when I can, but when things like that happen you have to have the mindset of a warrior and you have to be willing and able to kill that person if it means either your life or his. If you are not congruent and if you show fear then they can and will pick up on that and will use that against you without any remorse or mercy.
It's really not that hard to understand and that's why I tend to have trouble understanding as to why a lot of people on this forum tend to have trouble understanding and dealing with that properly.
There's a big difference between being prepared and unprepared.
Everything that I am talking about comes basically from experience. Living in one little city where you may know everyone is one thing, but when you travel to more than one city and when you deal with a lot of people that basically don't give a damn about anyone than themselves then you quickly realize that a lot of what is taught in most dojo's just is not up to par with the real world.
Stop and think about it for a minute. Have you ever had one of your students deal with real gangbangers, criminals, and crazies in your dojo like the police deal with on a daily basis. Somehow I doubt it. I also tend to doubt that any of your students have to deal with large corrupt corporations either.
As I've said before I did not come here to fight with anyone or to irritate anyone. I came here because at the moment I am dealing with a lot of unpleasant bs with people like I have just described in real world situations and because of that I have found that the only and best way for me to deal with that is to dig deep inside of myself and to dig out the warrior within me that does not hesitate to take action when needed and because of my previous exposure to the martial arts my best bet is the martial arts because that teaches things like how to deal with more than one attacker while at the same time maintaining your composure.
The attacker does not have to always physical in nature as attacks can come in other forms as well and that is what the martial arts is supposed to teach.
If people here really do know the martial arts then they should be able to understand as to where I am coming from and they should be able to help me to come up with some better defense strategies than I currently have as that would be a lot more productive than sitting around arguing all the time about stupid and useless things.
I know that most people here can't do a thing to help me with the legal issues, but they can offer advice as to how to better deal with the verbal and psycholgical attacks as well as the physical and they can take the time to understand me a lot better instead of automatically judging me. That would be a lot more appropriate, productive, and civil. Assuming things just doesn't work at all. The only thing that does is to make asses out of both people.
Simple common sense, courtesy, tact, and good people and communication skills and and usually do tend to work wonders.
You don't read ANYTHING anybody else posts, do you?
I have, but instead of hearing positive things I have only heard negative things from people and quite frankly I don't have time for it as I have other more important things to deal with like trying to win the lawsuit that I am currently involved with, finding a different job in a bad economy, trying to start several different businesses, and of course trying to do things like play the dating, mating, and relating game with women while at the same time trying to prepare myself for one of the most challenging things that I will ever end up having to deal with.
If my past is any indication of my future, then there is a good chance that I will probably end up seeing an ex-girlfriend that I once knew and loved and if I am understanding things corrently then there is a good chance that I am going to end up meeting the guy that she is currently with and that is something that I am going to have to deal with because if he is anything like a lot of people that I have met then chances are he is going to assume a lot of stupid things about me and will probably even want to fight me.
I personally don't want to fight anyone if I can help it, but if push comes to shove then I will. Ideally any kind of physical confrontation that I might end up in I'll be able to deal with by simply moving out of the way and using the least amount of force possible but I just can't count on that at all. Between the two I am not really sure as to who is going to be worse him or her.
In either case I am going to have to really think on my feet and I am going to have to really prepare for the unexpected as I really don't know as to what they are or will throw at me should I see them like I believe I will.
IMO, the govt. should concern themselves with the things that they know, not things that they dont, such as the martial arts. There are things that are not MA related, that're dangerous.....should the govt ban them as well?
And I can find a thousand other people who know nothing of the MAs, and think that they're bad. I've had people ask me what I train in. I tell them I train Kenpo, and they ask me if thats like TKD or like what Bruce Lee does.
Its highly unlikely you, me or anyone else will change the views of people, so IMO, no sense in worrying about it. Go about your training.
Perhaps you're getting honest answers, but they're answers that YOU dont like! IIRC, we've gone down this road with you, in past posts. You departed here for a while, came back, and seem just as unhappy as you were before.
What do relationship issues or something like 90% of the rest of this have to do with a potential law to outlaw martial arts? There's been no documentation supporting that law... Maybe we can return to it?
Otherwise -- I'll lock this thread, too.
NM. I was gonna reply to him but this guy seems like he's seriously out of his tree, sexist, and a waste of my time.
It has a lot to do with it because there are a lot of politicians out there that tend to believe what they see in the movies and as a result they like most people tend to make assumptions as to what the martial arts are really all about. It's a matter of perception just like it is with guns or cars and there are a lot of varying opinions as to what parts if any or all of the martial arts should be regulated because they tend to believe that if you train in the martial arts or even own martial art weapons they are a dangerous weapon.
What they seem to forget is that it is all a matter of intent. The martial arts and the weapons associated with it are not in of themselves bad.
A good analogy that one can compare it to is a gun. By itself is nothing more than an inanimate object. It can't jump up off the table and shoot you on it's own. In the hands of a someone that is properly trained in the use of a gun it can be used for self protection and food procurement, but in the hands of someone like a GKB gangerster it can can be used to kill someone.
How one trains in the martial arts and how one uses the martial arts is something that many legislators do not take into consideration because most of them really don't have much exposure to the martial arts and when they do hear of a negative story about someone who may have used the martial arts or a martial arts weapon in the wrong way they automatically tend to assume that everyone who has anything to do with the martial arts and that the martial arts itself is in and of itself bad.
Legislation has been proposed and passed relating to the martial arts for that very reason. It's not really much different than it is with the gun laws. The only difference is that unlike the gun laws you don't really hear about it as much as you do with the gun laws because the martial arts community is a smaller group than gun owners.
Because of the training lawmakers tend to hold you more accountable for your actions than then they do of someone that has never studied it before. Some of their conclusions are based upon fact and some of their conclusions are based upon what the media tends to portray of the martial arts.
Contrary to popular opinion the martial arts is not merely just another way for two people to beat the crap out of someone else. If you look back at the history of the martial arts then you will come to realize that while it does have military connotations it is not necessarily military in nature as not everyone who practiced it was a solider.
Some people like the Shaolin Monks believed in things like peace, harmony and spiritual, emotional and psychological growth and were generally a very peaceable people. To them the martial arts was meant to be a way of keeping the body healthy and in good shape.
The Ninja of ancient Japan tended to believe the same way. Unlike what the media tends to portray of the ninja where they are nothing but assassins their primary concern was to protect themselves, and their families from the Samurai. Yes, some of them did hire themselves out to do espionage and assassination activities, but they are in the minority and not the majority. The concept that the ninja being nothing more than assassins is a myth that has been perpetuated by Hollywood in order to increase sales.
Anyone that has done any real study of the martial arts will also know that all of the (DO) versions of the martial arts were developed primarily for sport and spiritual development. That does not mean that they can't be effective on the street. It does however mean though that because of the sport aspect much of the more deadly stuff that was orginally part of the martial art was willfully and deliberately removed in order to make it safe for tournaments and things like that.
That has had both a positive and a negative aspect. It's good for the tournament ring in that it makes it safer for the competitors, but it's also bad because it reduces it's effectiveness out on the street.
I personally have nothing against any of the DO versions, but when it comes to the street I tend to look more towards the versions that were orginally meant for combat and that have not been watered down or commercialized at all. That's why my first choice of martial arts is Ninjutsu and Special Forces type stuff as I know that stuff has not been turned into a sport like most of the other martial arts have and is therefore more effective out on the street or on the battlefield.
That's how I tend to approach the whole thing. Other's may have other choices that they believe work better for them and that they like and I respect that. All I'm saying not to forget the street aspect and the real world because ultimately the real world is where things are at.
Face it, Troll + Head up *** + Agenda here.
I'm not a troll so don't start that with me. What I'm sayingis simple common sense as it applies to the street.
If you think that some mugger or rapist is going to stop and wait while you get into some karate stance out on the street then you are seriously deluded because that just doesn't happen.
No one on the street is going to care what you study, who your teacher is nor are they going to sit and wait while you get into some Karate or Kung Fu stance and that is something that you need to stop and think about.
You also need to stop and think about what the law is going to say as well because if you do use what you have been trained in out on the street in a real fight and assuming that you are successful at winning the physical fight you are still going to have to deal with the law and what they say as there is nothing to say that the person you just beat up is not going to go to the police and file assault and battery charges against you. That's just simple common sense and given whatever amount of training that you might have there is good chance that the law can and will prosecute you if you do not excersize good judgement when it comes to self defense and the law. If you don't believe that then you can ask any attorney or police officer about that.
That's not to mention the civil penalties that can be brought against you as well by either the person that you just beat up or their family.
Separate names with a comma.