loki09789
Senior Master
They are not pseudonyms for parental laziness and inattentiveness (qualify that to say that at least in the clinical/medical community ), there is clinical information to explain the physiological differences between a normal range of development and an ADHD/ADD type of development in a person's brain. The problem is that, like many medical terms, what currently is called ADHD/ADD has had many other names through history.MACaver said:Ok but how do we KNOW for 100% sure that a child has ADHD or ADD? Do we really understand exactly what those two are. Or are they just a pseudonym for parental laziness and inattentiveness?
Another thing to consider is, if you were to compare driving a car to child rearing for the sake of analogy, if your child is more of a factory model car to represent the 'norm' range of development then the holes in parenting skills won't be so apparent. If your child is more of a high strung dragster or race car (not to imply superiority to the 'norm' but as example of 'out of the norm') that requires a more skilled touch, then the fact that your parenting skills are limited to folk levels of instruction (what you learn by watching your parents, others but not based on actual research and formal education) will become VERY apparent.
It takes more training/understanding/emotional control and a lot more personal awareness to raise an ADHD/ADD child and it takes some personal coping/preparation to deal with the internal experience as well because the children with a handicap need more.
The real 'miracle' is when parents of misdiagnosed children get the training and improve their parenting skills and the child suddenly is 'cured' of ADD/ADHD....which only leads to the mythical status/invalidity of how real ADHD is.
There is a clear prejudice/non acceptance for mental/developmental handicaps in the general public because ADD/ADHD/Clinical depression.... aren't as physically obvious as blindness, paralysis.... The general attitude I have come across is "there isn't anything wrong with those kids except for bad parenting and a swat across the bottom wouldn't cure." Though I agree that parenting skills need to be as passionately developed as some of us pursue our martial arts training, I don't think that ignoring the reality of ADD/ADHD and other mental handicaps helps. It leads to some serious false expectations of what these kids are and are not capable of and can really increase the negative self image that can come with knowing you are different.
I deal with these kids everyday and they know they are different. Their self perception/esteem depends quite a bit on how the world treats them and their condition. I constantly tell them that they are different (but even the 'normal' people are), but it isn't an excuse to quit, lower your life goals or to be bad. I also tell them that the meds are a helper, but not an excuse either. They are ultimately in charge of themselves. They may take longer, have to work harder in some areas than other kids, but they can be as accomplished as anyone else. I even cite how, after scientists have poured over bios of these people, some of the most successful people are folks who have channelled their 'handicap' into success like Einstein, Hawkings... and others who (though not in all cases ADD/ADHD) presented the same poor behavior, boredom, creativity... they just needed the right venue to express it in so they could shine.