In middle school I decided I wanted to try a combat sport, as I was a very combatively-minded, naturally aggressive person (still am). Wrestling was available.. so I jumped at it. It was borderline-traumatic for me. I was terrified going into every match and dreading every practice. I was completely miserable the whole way through. It utterly broke me. Fast forward to today, I still desperately want to learn how to defend myself and gain some physical/mental toughness. I have an appointment this Monday with some guys a couple towns over from mine to talk about me getting into their mma gym. I'm really excited and I think this is my chance to become the person I've wanted to be since I first developed an imagination. But I can't help but wonder if history will repeat itself. Here's what I want to think (and what I hope is true): Back then I simply did not have the emotional control, maturity and tolerance of loss to handle the demands of anything competitive and full-contact. Now that I am much, much older, more mature and less sensitive to hardship.. I am far more ready now than I ever was then, and possibly ever will be. But I really don't know. I'd like more thoughts on this, more perspectives and all that. Thanks in advance.