Conan the Barbarian

Yeah, kinda off topic... Was Solomon Kane any good?
I read one of Kane's novels and thought it was pretty good at the time... I guess I'd have to read it again.
Marvel did do a mini-series that were sometimes found in the back of SSOC mags and Gil Kane did the art work (and I'm not a big fan of his pencil)... they were basically Conan with a gun and sword as he was some type of Puritan avenger or something like that.

THIS is something we hope and pray to Crom, Ishtar, Mitra and even Set that never ever comes out...

Introducing... Conan, The Barbarian... the musical?? :barf:

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For the love of peanut butter! I hate this remake culture we're in now. MAybe you could get away with some, but others are untouchable. How can anyone be Conan beside the governator???? It's not possible!


Thing is, there are 2 cultures with Conan... the people who saw the movie, and the fans of the original novels. The way someone else can be Conan is to do him correctly.

Heck, when Rolf Moller played Conan in Conan the Adventurer, they intentionally tried to make him (conan) the same as the Conan from the movies. That was a mistake, IMO.
 
Thing is, there are 2 cultures with Conan... the people who saw the movie, and the fans of the original novels. The way someone else can be Conan is to do him correctly.

Heck, when Rolf Moller played Conan in Conan the Adventurer, they intentionally tried to make him (conan) the same as the Conan from the movies. That was a mistake, IMO.

Yes, I agree. I come from the old school of literary Conan (much like my love for literary Bond) and what's thus far been presented on screen has been a whole other animal (again, in the cases of both Conan and Bond).

I would never class this film as a remake as some are, considering Conan has yet to be "made." So far the closest portrayal in spirit to Conan has been (and I hate to say it) Vin Deizel in the Pitch Black movies. Not in look, but in just every other conceivable way.

As for the Conan TV show. That was born of the mid 90's syndication thing when there were a million bad shows on following Hercules and Xena. But for what it was, it was fun. I still watch an episode from time to time on Hulu.
 
As for the Conan TV show. That was born of the mid 90's syndication thing when there were a million bad shows on following Hercules and Xena. But for what it was, it was fun. I still watch an episode from time to time on Hulu.

Yeah, I feel that way about the Saturday Morning Cartoon they did.
 
So I saw the first trailer for this today in front of Battle LA.

I hope its better than the trailer...
 
Saw the trailor online. He said the like from "Queen Of The Black Coast!" I am officially freaking out with glee. Ok, back to may REH collextion

I thought the quality of the trailer was poor. It looked like a promo for a Syfy original film.
 

Here is the Trailer, btw.
 
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I thought the quality of the trailer was poor. It looked like a promo for a Syfy original film.


It's a teaser man. For the Dark Knight all you saw was a burning bat logo and the sound of Joker laughing. They get even more obscure from there.

What I saw were The Picts looking just how REH described them, Conan swinging his sword and saying a line from a Conan story.
 
It's a teaser man. For the Dark Knight all you saw was a burning bat logo and the sound of Joker laughing. They get even more obscure from there.

What I saw were The Picts looking just how REH described them, Conan swinging his sword and saying a line from a Conan story.

It wasn't how little they showed It was the quality of the Graphics and the cheap fade-in fade-out effects that I used to do back in the late 80's on my Commodore Amgia that I have an issue with... it looked totally amature. I can honestly say I have seen better work by kids on Youtube, and if I had seen that on youtube instead of in the theater, I would have thought it was one of those cheesy fan trailers people are always posting.
 
Ok, if you say so. I personally can't really judge a movie based upon characters moving in mists and shadows. But I do recognize who they are meant to be and I know what story Conan's line comes from so I'm happy.

Call it amateur if you wish, but I've seen enough to make me happy.
 
"I have known many gods. He who denies them is as blind as he who trusts them too deeply. I seek not beyond death. It may be the blackness averred by the Nemedian skeptics, or Crom's realm of ice and cloud, or the snowy plains and vaulted halls of the Nordheimer's Valhalla. I know not, nor do I care. Let me live deep while I live; let me know the rich juices of red meat and stinging wine on my palate, the hot embrace of white arms, the mad exultation of battle when the blue blades flame and crimson, and I am content. Let teachers and philosophers brood over questions of reality and illusion. I know this: if life is illusion, then I am no less an illusion, and being thus, the illusion is real to me. I live, I burn with life, I love, I slay, and am content." - Conan. REH, Queen Of The Black Coast.
 
Ok, if you say so. I personally can't really judge a movie based upon characters moving in mists and shadows. But I do recognize who they are meant to be and I know what story Conan's line comes from so I'm happy.

Call it amateur if you wish, but I've seen enough to make me happy.

I wasn't judging the movie, I was judging the trailer. I said in my OP that I hope the movie is better than the trailer.
 
Well I am hoping that this version will remove the bad taste I've had in my mouth ever since I sat in the theater for the first showing of the Ah-nold version of the barbarian. It was so bad that I never bothered to watch the second all the way through... I did NOT see it in the theater because I didn't want to waste my $$... nor did I see Red Sonja when I heard it was Bridgett Nielsen playing the part and then Ah-nold doing some other beefy character.

All the films were a quest to make $$ and the hell with the story.

One HOPES that this time around it'll be a quest for a great story.

Wonder if they're going to waste the first 15-25 minutes on introducing Conan?
 
Well I am hoping that this version will remove the bad taste I've had in my mouth ever since I sat in the theater for the first showing of the Ah-nold version of the barbarian. It was so bad that I never bothered to watch the second all the way through... I did NOT see it in the theater because I didn't want to waste my $$... nor did I see Red Sonja when I heard it was Bridgett Nielsen playing the part and then Ah-nold doing some other beefy character.
All the films were a quest to make $$ and the hell with the story.
One HOPES that this time around it'll be a quest for a great story.
Wonder if they're going to waste the first 15-25 minutes on introducing Conan

Yup, they are. The kid playing Young Conan is the kid who played Young Snake Eyes in GI Joe. The kid's got good Karate and TKD so it might make for some interesting scenes. I hear they are also using the same BS reasoning as the first one where the Cimmerians are killed and he is getting revenge.

My ideal Conan movie would be this. Opening scene we see a battle on the Steppes, in the middle of all this a woman gives birth. Skip ahead to when he's 16 and going on raiding parties to other villages and becoming the genius strategist and leader he is. Next he's struck by wanderlust and stories of wealth in the south from his southern grandfather so he leaves his village to take on the world ... then right into the story. All that can be done with no dialog, almost a montage and you get Conan's real story.

The Cimmerians were never defeated. The movie people seem to think that since they don't figure into the story after he leaves his village that they must be dead, or they think it's easier for the general audience to understand a revenge motive rather than the wondering samurai/mercenary/pirate/thief motivation.

John Milius' Conan got so much wrong, but I don't blame him. He never read a Conan book, he admitted as much and he was highly influenced by Frank Frazetta's art, which as great as it is, made Conan too big. After all, you don't end up looking like The Oak growing up scrambling over rocks, shooting arrows and riding horses. He was big but not that big. He frequently faced enemies way larger than him but he wins because of his smarts and unmatched skill.

{As an aside, if you check out Robert Jordan's Conan novels he is described at "giant," "massive," etc. But one has to take that with a grain of salt since Jordan's first book was Conan The Destroyer, the novelization of the movie. If that's your starting point then of course the whole series is gonna be screwed, heck, his Conan time-line of events does not even match up with REH's time-line, which is funny since his books are written in a way to have taken place in the gaps between REH's stories. Kinda like when Raymond Benson took over writing the James Bond series from John Gardner, suddenly IFP forced him to write to books closer in line with the movies, ad the female M, and just generally suck for his entire run.}

I would like to see Conan the eloquent speaker, the Napoleon meets Art Of War battlefield mastery, his charisma that turns even enemies into allies.
 
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