maxkawasaki
White Belt
- Joined
- Feb 15, 2023
- Messages
- 8
- Reaction score
- 3
I wanted to create a forum to hopefully allow people to share their thoughts on their mantra/beliefs and how you find yourself actually sticking to it in everyday life/impacts on your mental health.
I started to read the subtle art of not giving a f***, interesting book. But one thing that resonated with me the most was where the author had highlighted that if you choose what you give a f*** about (lets just say care), you will live a much better life than those who choose to focus all of their energy worrying about everything in their life, whether they can control it or not.
My life motto for so many years was 'it is what it is' every time something bad happened, and to be honest, it was my coping mechanism for a good portion of my life, lots of bad things would occur, plenty of failures but this approach in itself failed me. I ended up finding myself building this mound of issues in my head that would leave me feeling overwhelmed and stressed to the point where I would have a mental breakdown.
When I had read this book, for the first time, I just took a pause and really gave it some thought. I needed to stop worrying about so many things that I realistically could not control in my life. So I started to practice this, I started to choose where I would focus my energy on things that I had an influence on and I would acknowledge the bad things that were happening in my life but also acknowledged that there was nothing I could do to change this in the mean time.
For example, I was putting myself down a lot for gaining some weight over Christmas but I was so burnt out from focusing my energy on all these issues in my life that it felt overwhelming to even focus on how I could actually make a difference to improve my overall health and fitness. When I was receiving bad news about trying to sell my house, I had to acknowledge that this was going to be a long process, and that I should not focus my energy on worrying everyday about what the outcome COULD be, because realistically, it was out of my control and in a months or so time I would find out, so I would deal with it then. By choosing what I care about more, I actually started to find myself feeling much more relaxed at work and at home, and more energetic where I finally found myself looking at martial art gyms again and eventually signed up. Something I didn't think I've ever have the motivation to do.
Another insight I came across was 'are you living, or are you alive?'. This one also had an impact on me where I noticed for years, I just go to work, come home, go to gym, cook dinner, sleep, do it all again. Saving money for what is expected of an adult my age to be buying houses, thinking of super (mind you im only 25) and so on.
It turned out, I was miserable. I wasn't doing any of the things i really wanted to do, whether it was due to money concerns or just general fear. I had been wanting to travel to Egypt for well over a decade, and I had been wanting to learn BJJ for years too. But I was 25 and had nothing to show for it aside from a patch of dirt that was draining my bank account. So one day, I decided that was it, I will continue to save, but not at the cost of dying with dreams. I booked a trip to Egypt a week later, and a few months after that, I did a free trial at an MMA gym and took my first ever BJJ class (to which I am now hooked). There has been so many additional memories I have made in the past year whether costly or just taking the leap, and I am so much better for it.
So the question is, have you ever had to switch up your mindset? And how has did it impact you/your life?
I started to read the subtle art of not giving a f***, interesting book. But one thing that resonated with me the most was where the author had highlighted that if you choose what you give a f*** about (lets just say care), you will live a much better life than those who choose to focus all of their energy worrying about everything in their life, whether they can control it or not.
My life motto for so many years was 'it is what it is' every time something bad happened, and to be honest, it was my coping mechanism for a good portion of my life, lots of bad things would occur, plenty of failures but this approach in itself failed me. I ended up finding myself building this mound of issues in my head that would leave me feeling overwhelmed and stressed to the point where I would have a mental breakdown.
When I had read this book, for the first time, I just took a pause and really gave it some thought. I needed to stop worrying about so many things that I realistically could not control in my life. So I started to practice this, I started to choose where I would focus my energy on things that I had an influence on and I would acknowledge the bad things that were happening in my life but also acknowledged that there was nothing I could do to change this in the mean time.
For example, I was putting myself down a lot for gaining some weight over Christmas but I was so burnt out from focusing my energy on all these issues in my life that it felt overwhelming to even focus on how I could actually make a difference to improve my overall health and fitness. When I was receiving bad news about trying to sell my house, I had to acknowledge that this was going to be a long process, and that I should not focus my energy on worrying everyday about what the outcome COULD be, because realistically, it was out of my control and in a months or so time I would find out, so I would deal with it then. By choosing what I care about more, I actually started to find myself feeling much more relaxed at work and at home, and more energetic where I finally found myself looking at martial art gyms again and eventually signed up. Something I didn't think I've ever have the motivation to do.
Another insight I came across was 'are you living, or are you alive?'. This one also had an impact on me where I noticed for years, I just go to work, come home, go to gym, cook dinner, sleep, do it all again. Saving money for what is expected of an adult my age to be buying houses, thinking of super (mind you im only 25) and so on.
It turned out, I was miserable. I wasn't doing any of the things i really wanted to do, whether it was due to money concerns or just general fear. I had been wanting to travel to Egypt for well over a decade, and I had been wanting to learn BJJ for years too. But I was 25 and had nothing to show for it aside from a patch of dirt that was draining my bank account. So one day, I decided that was it, I will continue to save, but not at the cost of dying with dreams. I booked a trip to Egypt a week later, and a few months after that, I did a free trial at an MMA gym and took my first ever BJJ class (to which I am now hooked). There has been so many additional memories I have made in the past year whether costly or just taking the leap, and I am so much better for it.
So the question is, have you ever had to switch up your mindset? And how has did it impact you/your life?